"How are you feeling, Fred?”I must have launched my worst or most desolate look in the direction of my psychiatrist, because his reaction was too immediate for my taste. I must have made the landscape face that was becoming my favorite mask in the last few days. I must have shown everything but the truth about the way I felt.Because I'd rather not feel it. I would rather hide and act like everyone else would like Friederich Hanson to act. That I didn't care about the life of another missing person. That I did not lose nights of sleep and days in a catatonic state, always waiting for news. But that Friederich Hanson was dead. He died the day Rebecca Smith disappeared."Well," I spoke as a feigned and very usual answer. "I think we are progressing in the investigations.”I didn't even know who I really wanted to deceive with that story of progress. It was obvious that there was no progress. Rebecca, the woman I fell in love with, had been missing for more days than I would like to tel
I knew it was all my fault, but the certainty only came on the day Rebecca's mother received the news. In fact, when she saw, watching the news, that her daughter was missing. I was still in hospital. I was still debilitated, struggling to leave the devices and look for it. But Rebecca's mother went to the hospital. And she visited me.Sophie Smith, the woman that Rebecca admired so much for having survived a toxic relationship, was desolate, broken, lost. Even inside a hospital, even surrounded by my family and medical staff, she screamed and blamed me. She cried and pointed her finger at me, while saying:"You promised, Fred! You promised you would take care of my daughter, and you took her away from me!”After that day, my dreams were invaded by Sophie's voice, by the image of what I thought Rebecca would be already dead in some abandoned grave. And then, sleeping or taming myself with medicines, became everything but a moment of rest. And I couldn't even deny it. Because I knew it
As I had no idea about the time, I couldn't tell if since my last date with those men a whole day had passed or a few moments. I knew, however, that something was more than wrong even before a distant door opened and lights were lit.For a long time, I blinked, trying to get used to the excessive light. I was getting used to the dark, especially considering that I spent most of the time surrounded by it. However, on that day, not only a light was lit above my head, but several.My first instinct was to look up, trying to find windows, or any possible passage through the roof. There was nothing, of course. We were in what seemed to me a huge shed, whose stairs and pilasters were made of old iron. I had never paid attention to the sound that men made when going down the steps, or they were careful that I didn't listen, because that day, the noise was too loud for me not to look.Everyone wore ski mask, caps to hide their faces, and black clothes. The fact that they took the trouble to c
I let a singing smile be sketched by my lips. I didn't make any positive gestures, but I kept quiet, watching him. The man frowned lightly, then walked away. At least the tactic of facing the kidnapper to the point that he thought that I would never allow myself to forget his features still worked. I held on not to ask why he didn't cover his face like the others.Instead, I waited until he sat down, started cutting his chicken again and faced the food again. The smell was driving me crazy. I had the impression that anyone would see me as an addict in the face of what had left him in abstinence. I could very well have eaten that wooden table, if a paint of salt and lemon was placed on it.However, something was wrong. The fact that the man ate the chicken did not mean that all the rest of the food was not poisoned. I doubted that they could have all that work to do with me, they could very well do it in the traditional way. On second thought, it wasn't even necessary to put poison in
"If you didn't want me to assault your ex-girlfriend, why the hell did you bring me here? "Questioned Madeleine, leaning back in the car seat."Because I would like a female company to confront her, and not physical strength," I explained for the thousandth time. I threw a look out, trying to see the dark, and watching an unknown couple go out through the doors of the establishment next door. "Besides, I don't want you to cause even more trouble for us, Maddie.”Madeleine laughed mockingly."Oh, dear brother, problems are what we have the most lately. And you need to stop this habit of acting diplomatically. If this crazy woman is with Becca, as you suggested to drag me here, then we will have to assault her so that she speaks. So, I do that, and it's good for you to stay away so you don't get arrested.”I sighed. Through the rearview mirror, Tyler gave me a fun look. Of course, for him, there was a tone of humor in that whole scene. It was not he who had almost had a heart attack whe
"I have no idea," she said, smiling nervously. Joana's eyes were wide, and her hair, stuck in an elastic band, was already beginning to be untied by her restless and anxious hands. "Fred, I have no idea who Rebecca is and where she may be from.I snorted, asking the universe for strength not to lose my reason. Madeleine mocked with a loud laugh, taking a step forward. I stopped her by putting a hand in front, but she also trembled, or maybe it was me. The situation was stressful. Rebecca was somewhere. She was alive, suffering. Or she was dead, and needed something worthy to be remembered.Joana knew everything. It was visible. The way she trembled, how she tried to lie looking into my eyes, reminded me of all the months we spent together. She was a girlfriend, not a submissive. Of course, he heard about my tastes and tried to adapt, but he didn't succeed. She was jealous of my relationship with Rebecca, and somehow still mysterious, managed to be in the same place as Rebecca, just to
“Good morning, sleeping beauty.”I got up in a jump, not knowing where I was. I had slept, apparently, for a whole night (or day). I was still in that place without windows and with a single iron door and, in front of me, sitting in a lonely wooden chair, was my tormentor; the man with the scar on his face.At the moment, he wasn't smiling. It was very clear that seeing me in a comfortable situation was not exactly the kind of fun he was looking for. Or maybe he stayed a long time in that same position, waiting for the moment when I would move and give signs that I was still breathing. Maybe he was hoping I wasn't.“What’s going on? "I asked with suspicion, diverting my eyes from him to the soft furniture below me. I was shocked to realize it was a bed."I brought gifts," he said, shrugging.I must have fallen asleep after eating, and that episode had been so unprecedented and exciting that I had exhausted my strength that was no longer that big. I didn't find the big table with the b
I sighed, indignant. I didn't know why the hell I bothered to ask a question, if the man always found a way to leave me in the dark and terrified. He had fun with that, it was a way to remind me all the time that my life was already ruined, inside or outside, it didn't matter. I would not forget him, everyone else, and would still have to deal with the feeling of impunity for never having a way to recognize their faces."What do you think so much about? "He asked, tilting his head lightly. "I get annoyed when you start to wander so much, it's not kind at all.”"Do you please wait? “I asked in a mocking tone. "I am locked up with strangers, who tortured me to arrest something that was no need, and now I know that I will never get rid of it. That I will never be free or dead. How can I be kind in some way? I'm tired of it.”“Do you prefer that I kill her? "He suggested, pouting.I rolled my eyes."I prefer you to just forget that I exist. All of you, and Elide's crazy girl too. By the w
I had woken up all sweaty and panting. I had had a nightmare like that.I found myself again in that terrible basement, and the smell was so putrid that my nose burned. The men who tortured me had faces. They were well-known men. Some good, others naturally bad. And they knew me too. They smiled when they tortured me, they screamed and laughed. And I, sitting in that chair, just wanted them to be fast, because I needed to sleep and wake up in a good place.There were days when nightmares didn't happen, but lately, they were constant. So, when I woke up in panic, I didn't need to count my fingers. I simply looked out the window and saw the landscape moving, felt the soft swing of the bed, and looked in the direction of the portraits that were glued to the walls so as not to run the risk of falling. I saw the child smiling with teeth still being born, with blond hair fluttering through the wind, and eyes similar to his father's. So I knew I wasn't dreaming.That day, I got up and looked
When I finally got to the hospital, I learned that even Tyler was fine. My mother was in a panic, but taking care of Madeleine, who seemed to be a reality show star who had just had one night like that. Raphael was with Becca's mother, because his family was still on their way to Seattle. Meanwhile, whether she wanted to or not, Rebecca was only accompanied by Pauline. My cousin's girlfriend left the room when I arrived, throwing me what seemed to be her first look of pleasure. I was surprised, but I thought it was just an effect of the madness of that day.“How are you? “I asked Rebecca.She was sitting on the bed, with her hands crossed on her lap and staring at the emptiness."I'm fine, just trying to absorb.”"Do you want to know his reasons? “I asked.Becca denied it with her head."I know they will never be enough. I've never done anything against him. And I should never have gone through what I went through.”Becca's voice became trembling at the end of her sentence, and I felt
Madeleine and Raphael were really at the place where Finley had sent me, but unfortunately the damn Donovan had set traps around the place. That day seemed to be the day I would die, or that the son of a bitch planned to be my end, but it wasn't. Luckily, or perhaps because they got tired of being incompetent, the police did their job of protecting me before I reached the destination that was supposed to be my end.As they found me, it would take me a while to know that it was because Mark was tracking me clandestinely. The damn investigator was suspicious of my steps "he still had that ridiculous idea that me or my sister were behind Joana's murder and trying to cover everything up," and that's what ensured that he would send a car to the scene. But I found out about the bombs in the worst possible way, watching the death of more innocents.If he were put on a paper, that day, Donovan would take at least a life sentence for the amount of deaths he had caused. In fact, it was those de
"Why are you doing this? "I asked in desperation, knowing that my voice would come out absurdly loud on the phone. "Madeleine never did anything against anyone. Raphael doesn't deserve any of this. If you want me, come pick me up.”“Oh, no, dog. I can't. Did you forget that you put me in jail? "He made fun of him, giggling. "And don't do so much drama, you just have to choose a name, and then it ends. At least that part, since I have some surprises for you after that.”"How the hell are you calling me if you're still stuck?”"I have some privileges.”"And how are you planning things if you can't get out of there?”"I'm still just the spokesman, dog," he said, looking so comfortable on the phone, that I swore I would be sitting with my legs up, and not in a police phone booth. It was outrageous that he had time for that kind of thing. I was outraged, but I couldn't prove it. "And I'm calling so you can decide which of your close friends should survive. Think about it, I could very well
"Can someone tell me what the fuck is going on here? "I besieged no one in particular, and I didn't even have an answer, because everyone was giving priority to surround me and try to take me safely to the car. Unfortunately, many of my security guards were being hit at that act. Everything to keep me alive, because the intention of the men who opened fire on us was simply to kill me. "How could this be happening?”"Stay behind me, boss," Tyler asked, shooting mercilessly at men who didn't even bother to wear masks, since they were really planning to end my life that day. "We were betrayed in some way.”Betrayed because only my team knew where I was going or coming throughout my day, and that team was carefully chosen to maintain the secrecy of my routine. And if those people were linked to my number one enemy, or to the gangs that wanted my blood every day, they were there, then that meant that someone from inside had passed on the news. In the midst of chaos, I felt my cell phone vi
"But how can I have my period normally? "I asked in despair, my eyes could barely see the test lines in Pauline's hand. I leaned even more against the door, ending up sitting on the floor. Suddenly, my stomach seemed not to know what its function was, and I felt extremely nauseous and with blurred views. “Pauline, that can't be true. Fred and I are barely having sex... I mean, we are, but not as often as before. In addition, pain remedies and antibiotics are too strong for a pregnancy to happen. The doctors told me about it in the hospital. In fact, they made it very clear that due to the lack of menstruation, I wouldn't ovulate. That's why Fred and I rely so much on not using any condoms, since I couldn't use the pill either. This is simply impossible to happen.”"But you told me that your period is in a much smaller flow and on irregular days," said Pauline, tilting her head lightly. I hadn't even noticed that she was sitting next to me, staring at the test as if he were the child h
"What is your real doubt? " Pauline asked, separating my medicines by schedules inside plastic coconuts."Well, I have several, especially about this virus," I explained after a long sigh. "I don't feel well, I had to end the self-defense class earlier today. I just wanted to lie down and be silent for as long as possible, but someone is always coming in to know how I am and if I'm still alive. I don't want to do anything in my life today. I think this is a very serious symptom.”Pauline laughed, moving away from the nightstand where she had put the medicines of the day. She only offered me a glass of water and baking soda, because I had complained about a strange feeling in the mouth of her stomach. It wasn't nausea or heartburn, but something so weird that I just wanted to lie down and complain all day.Moura didn't like that I had said I couldn't stand the stride of a full class, and left grumbling with Elijah who didn't know why he put her in situations of training people who didn
August Spencil was the dumbest man I've ever had the displeasure of meeting on the face of the earth.The worst part was knowing that he had some shares of my company and claimed to be a partner, but if everything depended on him, I would be bankrupt before sunset. I didn't know how Maddie had dealt with him in recent months, but I was already planning to buy a new car for her in thanks, because putting up with August was not an easy job for anyone. The man had such big shitty ideas that he couldn't take it seriously."It's just that you're not listening to me, Fred," said August, for what seemed to be the thousandth time. And I wished I wasn't in that car with him, I wished I wasn't going on a two-hour trip with him, and that I didn't have the blessed idea of giving a ride to that asshole. But no matter how big my will was, I couldn't make time come back. "I've already said that Canadians are trying to pass us back. They are almost infiltrating people in our company, just to know wha
The months seemed to pass absurdly quickly. In the blink of an eye, two of them passed by. Two months in which Elide remained trapped and saying that he would only recognize his accomplice if he heard his voice. The men who tortured me kept silent. They did not have lawyers, unlike Elide, who hired only the best of the entire state. Fred was also committed to listening to what Elide had to say, so he continually visited her on the days when the police tried to interrogate her.Meanwhile, my health improved, at least, on the one hand. Around two weeks before, I started to feel tired and with a ringing in my ear that didn't pass at all. I visited medical specialists, and everyone said the same thing: that it was probably something emotional, that there were no infections and no reasons for me to get so upset with that strange sound inside a single ear. The point is that I barely slept at night, and in the morning, I woke up very early to train with Elijah and Moura.Moura was a former s