Chapter 9 : All or Nothing

*William*

I laced up my shoes and grabbed my earbuds for my 6:00 AM morning run. I saluted Frank, my doorman of twenty years, who was busy finding an umbrella for a guest. It was hard to believe we’d known each other that long. Now nearing seventy, Frank moved quickly to hold the door for a lady and her stroller, then winked at me.

“Watch out for the rain puddles, sir.”

Though he’d lost roughly an inch in height with rounded shoulders, he was still a spry older man with a considerate nature. Frank had been there through all the momentous occasions in my life; my marriage to Victoria, Eva’s birth, my father’s passing, and my divorce. He never forgot my birthday or Eva’s. I thanked him and headed out.

I was a man of rituals. I’d run in rainstorms, icy conditions, and even during the dank, sweltering summer months. Running was my time to unplug from the world and clear my head.

I crossed the park and leaned on a bench to stretch my legs, noticing two policemen standing near a man setting up his food cart for the day.

We New Yorkers were ready for spring after an ungodly cold winter with more snow than we’d had in decades. We relished even the hint of sunshine. A light breeze carried the floral scent of the cherry blossom trees that varied from pearly white to pale pink and deep magenta. With the harsh winter looming behind us, the blooming promised a bright, hopeful future.

I longed to take Lily there and wondered if she biked. My mind drifted to her often as I started with a light jog, then picked up the pace as I crossed the Bow Bridge. Once I got Lily on my mind, there was no going back. Like a computer chip playing the same repeated programs, I saw her face and her portraits, and I heard her light laughter.

I relished our brief kiss and what was to come. If she didn’t get scared off by my age, or my daughter, I hoped my future included Lily.

Wanting to be respectful, I had offered an overtly chaste peck goodnight at the end of the evening, then regretted it when I saw the dismay on her face. I was at least wise enough to know that some things were worth waiting for, and Lily was one of them.

Few people were out this early, just a handful of vagabonds and a few other runners. The high-performance commuters who hit the office by 7:00 AM speed-walked through lights with Starbucks cups, and women wearing suites and sneakers trekked downtown, already making deals on the phone. The tourists didn’t hit the park until later.

I paused to get a quick drink at the same fountain I stopped at daily before recrossing the Bow Bridge and then heading back to take a shower.

I wondered if Lily was up this early. It had only been a few days, yet it felt like I’d known her much longer. Our date night had been perfect, minus running into Elaine, but part of me was glad it had happened.

I wanted Victoria to realize I was dating again, not that I wanted to hurt her, but just to quash all these crazy romantic notions Eva had about us getting back together. We’d been separated for ages, but the divorce dragged out forever. The last twenty months had been a painful battle, with lawyers bickering over real estate and fiscal numbers. I had finally told my attorney I wanted it to end; just give Victoria whatever she wanted.

Surprisingly, the peace only lasted about four months before she started up with her demands again. Lily was the complete opposite of my ex-wife and most women I knew; she was so damn down to earth and unfazed by material things. She still seemed like a dream. I couldn’t believe how lucky I was to have found her.

The sun was fully up now, lighting up the streets. A chorus of birds chirped in song, and the city came alive with sirens and horns.

Just as I entered my highrise, I got a call from Eva, which could only mean one of two things–she wanted more money for her trip, or she had already spoken with her mother, who had talked to Elaine and wanted to know about my date. I cringed, then figured I might as well get it over with.

“Hi, Daddy. I’ve decided to take you up on your offer,” she said in a chipper tone.

For a moment, my mind went blank, and then I remembered the social media app. “Oh, you have?” This was unexpected.

“I’ve decided to help you with your little innovative social media app. But it will have to wait until I get back from Belize.”

“Excellent. I’ll have Marsha from marketing reach out to you,” I said.

“I’ve already gotten some ideas. Where are you?” she asked.

I had turned on the shower to get the perfect steam going. “Eva, I’m about to jump in the shower.”

“Where is my painting from the gallery? I haven’t gotten it yet.” She had a pouty tone to her voice.

“Oh, I’ll take care of it for you.”

“I talked to Lily, and she’s being kicked out of her apartment. It sounds like she might have to move back to Kansas City or wherever she’s from. She seemed a little desperate and even asked if I knew anyone looking for a roommate.” She sighed, and I could imagine her rolling her eyes.

“Well, what is she going to do?”

“I don’t know, not my problem. I asked her to go on the trip with us, but I knew she’d say no. It’s not her scene. All she does is work and paint.”

“Eva, I have to go. Have a great trip, and we’ll talk when you return.”

“Okay, I’ll send pics from the beach. Ciao.”

My wheels were already in motion devising a plan for Lily. We had to have an opening in one of our buildings. I knew she couldn’t afford the rent, but she might say yes if I offered it to her like she’d be doing me a favor or if I commissioned her for her artistic abilities. I only hoped she wasn’t packing her bags to head back to the Midwest as Eva suggested.

Eva’s lack of empathy really astounded me at times. But I needed to do something to help Lily. That was of the utmost importance.

***

*Lily*

I hustled down the block past several food trucks and restaurants that made my mouth water. I’d had one of Adam’s cappuccinos in lieu of breakfast and was now officially starving. My blood sugar dropped with every block, and my hands felt unusually jittery as I tried texting Tony.

I was late for lunch with him, which only worsened my situation. Tony wanted me to sign a contract with him, but I wasn’t ready to do that yet.

Butterflies swarmed my mid-section as I sat in the wooden booth by the window. “Tony, I am so sorry I’m late.” I removed my trench coat and pulled my ponytail out of my sweater. He jumped up and kissed in the air toward my cheeks.

He was wearing a silk shirt and black pants, and his black hair seemed extra slicked back. “Lily, my girl. How are you?”

“Good, great. How about you?” I smiled.

“Things have never been better. There was more press than I could have hoped for from the showing. I keep finding articles online about my three rising stars!”

It made my heart happy to have him so happy.

“Any luck finding a place?”

“Not yet. I have a ton of feelers out there.” I sighed. It was a frustrating situation.

Just then, a girl with a nose ring and black dramatic catlike eyeliner asked to take our order. I ordered the cobb salad, and Tony ordered a hamburger without the bun. “Still watching my carbs.” He touched his abs. “Ready to get back to work?”

I cleared my throat. “Tony, I’m sorry, I can’t sign with you quite yet. I can’t start working until I get this apartment thing sorted. I’m really in dire straits. I have to find a place to live soon. If not, I may have to move back home.”

His smile disappeared. “Lily? Are you kidding?” His voice cracked at the end. “You can’t leave now. Your work is the talk of the town. You’re on the verge of a budding career.”

“I’ve spent all morning boxing up my things. I have to be out by the end of the month, and I can’t afford a place on my own.”

“You’ll find something! You’ve got the commission from the sales coming,” he reminded me.

Even though my undergrad degree was paid for, I had taken additional art classes over the past year, equating to around ten thousand dollars in student loans. “I was going to use that to pay my school debt.”

“Would your parents help out?”

“No,” I answered right away. “They won’t help me if it reinforces my decision to stay in New York.”

“How’s your next project shaping up?”

“I haven’t gotten very far. I have this apartment thing hanging over my head. I’ve had to start packing up my belongings. My easels and paint are all in boxes. The realtor is already starting to show the place, and she wants us out.” I ran a hand through my hair in frustration.

“Wow, those guys sure didn’t give you much warning.” He shook his head.

“It’s not their fault. They were waiting until after the gallery opening to tell me.” Maybe it was an excuse, I didn’t know. But he had a point.

Patrick and Adam had promised me I could stay in the guestroom of the new brownstone for as long as needed, but I hated to impose. I knew they would want to christen the place and start a family. They had already begun planning for a nursery. I didn’t want to become a burden and have them start resenting me.

“So, do you have any ideas for a new collection once you’re settled? You mentioned a carnival theme.” I loved Tony, but he was a workaholic and expected everyone around him to be one too.

Before I could answer, my phone started vibrating. The call was from a local number, but not someone I knew. “I’m sorry, Tony. I have to take this. It may be about an apartment.”

I walked outside to take the call since the restaurant was bustling with servers clanking glasses, loud voices from the surrounding tables, and loud rock music playing through the sound system. I held my finger in my ear.

“Ms. Matthews, my name is Grace Kim. I’m William Shaw’s assistant.”

“Hello,” I said, pausing, wondering what this was about.

“Mr. Shaw has a proposition for you to commission a new art collection for a trio of buildings he’s purchasing in Toronto. He also offers an apartment that can be a studio for you to paint in.”

I walked by a man spraying the cement in front of his restaurant and turned up the collar on my coat as the spring showers cascaded down in sheets. Stepping under an awning, I was unable to believe what I was hearing.

“William Shaw is offering me an apartment and job to commission a series of paintings for him? How much is the rent?” I asked.

“Mr. Shaw will cover the rent while you paint,” she replied.

“A free place where I can paint all day long.” I had to say it out loud to make sure it was real because it sounded incredible, a dream come true. The only problem was that it meant I might have to leave Tony. I wasn’t sure how I could work for them both. How did William know?

“Grace, can I think it over?”

After the briefest of pauses, she said, “Of course.”

“Thank you.”

“Why don’t you come by the place and check it out? It might help you make your decision,” she offered.

“Yes, thanks.”

“I’ll text you the address,” she said as we continued our conversation.

I hadn’t accepted William’s proposal on the spot because I had a great deal to consider. The heart of the matter, and what I was most concerned with, was that taking the job and apartment would alter any hope of a relationship with William.

After his chaste kiss on the cheek last night, maybe he had second thoughts about us. Perhaps he wanted to spare Eva’s feelings and thought the age difference was too wide. On the other hand, what if he wanted me as some concubine and was using my artistic abilities as a ruse?

As if she read my mind, Grace reassured me that it was a business proposition and that William genuinely liked my art. She explained that William wanted to commission a collection for new office space, and having me stay in the apartment would make it easier for us to work together. It sounded too good to be true, and as my father always said, if it sounds too good, it usually is.

I made an appointment to meet her that afternoon to check out the space. I certainly couldn’t make a decision until I had seen it. Back inside, at the table, Tony was also on the phone. He moved his hands when he talked in a grand fashion. I slid into the booth just before our food arrived.