Chapter 5 - John

Logan had apparently walked to the cemetery, so I gave him a ride back with me. I should have let him walk. “I understand your concern that she’s a human, but it doesn’t change that she’s your mate, brother.” he shook his head. “No, I don’t think you do. And you should. You brought Suzu and Hana into our world. And it got Suzu killed, and Siegfried nearly killed Hana two years ago.” I pointed out.

My knuckles were turning white as I was gripping the wheel so tightly. “I will not place her in unnecessary danger.” I growled. I know Irving agrees, even if all he wants is to have her by our side. “Do not use Suzu and Hana as your fucking excuse to be a damn purest coward!” Logan roared. Even after all this time, Suzu is a sore subject for him. I know it, but he has to see where I’m coming from.

I slammed the brakes and glared at my brother. His Alpha aura was in full force, and his eyes were rimmed with Jericho’s blood-red as they otherwise flickered between Logan’s natural blue and Jericho’s red. Irving was whimpering in my head. Even though I am also of alpha blood and Logan’s elder brother, my wolf still recognizes his alpha.

I was doing my damndest to ignore Irving’s need to bare his neck to Logan and Jericho. I am his older brother, god damn it. “FUCK YOU!” I shouted. It was all me at this point. Irving wasn’t lending any of his power to my words. He didn’t want to appear to challenge his Alpha. And I accept that. I don’t want to challenge Jericho or Logan, at least not in that sense. But I’m the big brother, and I’m not going to let him say shit like that to me

“How fucking dare you call me that! Which of us was the one that had to quell father’s anger and mother’s sorrow when you showed up from the gathering in Japan not with a mate but a lover? Oh right, that was me! I’m the one that took your beating because I told father if he was angry at someone, if he had to hit someone, it would have to be me because I wouldn’t allow him to touch my brother and alpha.” I ranted, unleashing years of frustration.

“You only heard whispers of disapproval and unrest amongst our pack when our alpha brought not just a human but a human who wasn’t his mate to live with us and practically be his Luna. I’m the one that was hearing the complaints and grievances about it. I was the one putting people in their place, telling them to let it go. I’m the one that shielded you, Suzu, and Hana from their mockery. So don’t ever call me a purest!” I continued to rant.

“I never cared that Suzu was human. I worried for her and Hana. I still worry for Hana. We are Kinsleys. In the supernatural world, that means we have enemies that look for any weak spots to exploit. And outside the supernatural community, we have enemies that would like to bring us to heel. If it weren’t Siegfried, it would have been someone else who went after her.” I sighed.

Logan was staring at me with a gaping jaw. I’m the reserved brother. I don’t lose my temper. “John....” he sighed. “I know, okay. I know you’ve always stood up for me. Even before I shifted, you were defending me because I was labeled the runt. I didn’t realize dad beat on you because he wanted to beat on me over Suzu. But John… you can’t ignore your mate. You cannot ignore the bond. Trust me.” he shook his head.

“I can. It’s for her safety.” I sternly said. And what does my brother do? He laughs! The asshole is laughing at me! “John, I know you like to think you have this willpower of steel or something, but nothing stops the mate bond but rejecting them. And you won’t reject her. Our pack doesn’t allow the rejection of mates. We are firm believers that the moon goddess doesn’t get it wrong and that we must uphold her will.” he sighed.

“For her safety, I can.” I grumbled, sure I could resist the pull. “Right. Like I was successful in resisting Aurelia when she was a camper, and I knew I should.” he rolled his eyes. “You were in the same place and could smell her. I’m in a completely different town than Sarael. I won’t have to see her.” I argued. “Wait… hold on. Sarael? As in our florist? She’s your mate?” he blinked. “Um. Yes.” my lips pressed into a thin line, trying not to frown. 

“You won’t be able to escape her then. Not with everything that’s going to go into planning this wedding. And now that we know Aurelia is pregnant, there will be doctor appointments, and you’ll have to meet with people in our stead.” he laughed. “Send Sybille then. It isn’t like pack business or our family company. Sybille is more than qualified to handle assisting with wedding arrangements.” I shook my head.

“Sybille has a toddler to chase after. She doesn’t need the workload.” he smirked. “It’s just the florist. I doubt even if I do assist you as you seem so keen on me doing, it will require me interacting with her much. Now knock it off before we get home. You cannot tell anyone about her.” I insisted. “What? Why not?” he frowned.

“Have you listened to anything I’ve said? I’m trying to protect her. News gets out that both Kinsleys have mates, and we paint a bigger target. I’m sure plenty are looking for a way to use the wedding to target us. And just like I’m sure you want to keep word about the pup from spreading too far for Aurelia and its safety, I don’t want word getting out and putting Sarael in danger.” I rationalized.

“I think you are overthinking this. But fine, I won’t announce that our Beta has found his mate.” he shrugged. “Good. You can’t tell Charles, Sybille, Silvercloud, Hana, or Aurelia either.” I added as I parked. “Wait. I don’t keep things from Aurelia. At least things that are surprises for her. Like I’m not telling her about getting plans ready to convert the room next to ours into a nursery. But John… you can’t expect me not to tell her that our florist is your mate.” he frowned. 

“I can, and I do. She’s the one that will deal with Sarael the most. I don’t want her pregnancy hormone brain to slip and say something she shouldn’t. So promise me, brother. Promise you will tell no one about my mate?” I turned my gaze to him as I extended my hand. He sighed but took my hand. “I promise to tell no one about your mate.” he vowed as our handshake slid to a wrist grip then to a fist bump. It was probably dumb, but it was our brothers' handshake.

I nodded and followed him inside, secure in the fact my secret was safe. “Uncle John! Uncle John! Did you hear??!!” Hana shouted as she raced at Logan and me. “I’m going to be a big sister!” she announced proudly. “Yes. Your dad and I were talking about that.” I nodded, hugging her. Aurelia walked out of the kitchen, chomping into a banana. She didn’t look as thrilled as my niece or brother at the news.

“If you say ‘I told you so’ or anything along those lines, so help me, John, I will make you a eunuch and apologize to your mate when you find her by buying her a vibrator.” she glared at me, taking a large bite of the banana. I raised an eyebrow and glanced at Logan. Despite the rather aggressive way she just ate that fruit, his damn eyes were clouded with lust. 

I rolled my eyes. “I would never dare ridicule you, Luna.” I smiled, offering her the wildflowers. “I thought you could use some cheering up no matter what the doctor said. I also have the quote from Sarael for you to review and sign. She also said she emailed them to you.” I reported, offering her the quote. 

“Well, at least that’s good news.” she said, taking the flowers and the quote with a small smile. “Aurelia…” Logan frowned. “Are you saying our future alpha isn’t good news?” I arched an eyebrow casting a glance at her still, very flat stomach. She sighed, shoulders sinking. “No, I'm not saying that. It’s just the timing. I don’t want to have to choose my wedding dress based on accommodating a pregnant belly. I’ll be starting to show by November.” she frowned. 

I sighed, cocking my head. “No, you won’t.” I assured her. Her brow furrowed as she looked up at me. “I’ll be six months pregnant by the wedding. So pretty sure I’ll be showing.” she frowned. “You’re carrying a Kinsley.” I stated like that explains it all. “And that means what?” she demanded, hands on her hips. A few petals of the flowers fluttered to the floor with the movement.

“Despite how big an alpha typically is, Kinsleys tend to be small infants.” I explained. “Seriously?” she asked, eyeing me like she didn’t believe I was ever small. “Yes. I weighed a mere five pounds two ounces at birth and was only seventeen inches tall. Logan was born full-term but looked like a premi, being even smaller than I was. But my weight and height at birth were average for Kinsleys. Never understood why.” I shrugged.

Aurelia’s brow remained furrowed, her stand softened as she put the hand holding the quote against her belly. “Well as long as the baby is born healthy.” she conceded. “And our pup will be. They will be healthy and happy.” Logan promised, kissing her. The kiss started to take a turn to be more passionate as her arms snaked around his neck, petals now getting in his hair. 

“Okay, so while you two make out, I’ll put the flowers in water, you know, before you kill them.” I sighed, taking the flowers from her. Hanna snickered as she skipped along with me to the kitchen. Neither Aurelia nor Logan noticed or acknowledged what I said. “Isn’t it sweet that they are still so in love?” Hana sighed, leaning her chin in her hands. I rolled my eyes. “That’s the way of mates. As long as they don’t start having sex in the foyer, it’s fine.” I frowned, reminded of my mate who I will never be with.

“When will you find your mate, Uncle John?” she asked. I sucked in a breath because the question was innocent enough. Especially coming from my twelve-year-old niece. “Only the Goddess knows.” I sighed. She was frowning at me before suddenly hugging me as I put the vase on the counter. “You’ll meet her. I’m sure of it. And I know she will be a strong she-wolf that will be a good match for you and Irving. She’ll have to be perfect for you. She’ll be your soulmate.” she grinned up at me.

Oh, if she only knew. “I’m sure the Goddess has a plan.” I patted her head. “Now then, I have work I should be attending to. Find a good place for Aurelia’s flowers.” I smiled, leaving her to handle the flowers. Walking back out, I groaned because I briefly saw the bar back of my brother as he was tugged into his office, the door closing behind him. 

Seeing Logan happy and in love hadn’t bothered me as much before Sarael. ‘But it’s different. You are actively choosing not to be happy and in love.’ Irving oh so helpfully chimed in. ‘You know, bringing her into the supernatural world would put her in danger.’ I grumbled. ‘She’s our mate. The Goddess felt she could handle it. Don’t question the Goddess, John. We should be near our mate. We should be with her.’ he huffed.

I rolled my eyes and went to my office. I needed to keep myself busy, so I would stop thinking about her. It didn’t work very well. Irving was constantly thinking about her and bringing up mental images of her to taunt me. I wanted to clear my head, so I’d left the packhouse and shifted, letting Irving run. Such a bad idea. 

Every time I told him to turn back around, he ignored me. The next thing I knew, we were near the parking lot near her shop, watching her like a damn creepier. ‘Irving. This is stalker activity. We should not be stalking her.’ I argued with him as she seemed nervous looking around the parking lot. I swore she looked at me, and finally, Irving let me have some control, and we started to leave.

It didn’t last long. Irving was back in control, being a damn creeper as he followed her home. Settling into the rose bushes to watch over her. ‘She has a cat.’ Irving growled softly. He hates cats. I’m indifferent. ‘That’s not a mere cat. It knows we are here. I think she knows we’re here too.’ I commented, finding the way both looked out the window at us concerning. And then how she walked away from the room, her hips swaying, making me gulp down my desire to shift and knock at her door. To ask her to let me in. Into her house. Into her bed. Into her heart. I’m a goner.