Chapter 4

[Alexander]

I didn’t mean to walk in on her like this. Even after last night when I had seen her at her very worst, the thoughts I had back then were modest in comparison to what I was thinking now. The parts of her body that weren’t covered by the towel glistened with pearls of water. The paleness of her skin from last night had turned to a soft golden tan - which meant she was very much alive. I took a step forward and trained my ears to her beating heart. Steady, but the closer I moved towards her, the more rapid her heart beat. It gave me somewhat of a kick to watch the way she froze on the spot, her mouth standing slightly agape as if my presence shocked her and my good looks seized her tongue.

I then realized why she was here in the first place, and the fact that she was anywhere but in bed, resting off the effects of her injuries, made me mad. Amelia was nowhere to be seen either, and she’d get an earful for leaving this woman alone.

“Why aren’t you sleeping?”

I must have hit an octave too deep - the voice I would usually keep aside for when I was giving orders - because she looked up at me with big brown eyes like a deer caught in headlights and a trembling bottom lip. I didn’t mean to scare her, but I was genuinely upset because I cared. I had to fight the urge to reach out and run my thumb across her lip to stop it from quivering.

“Wh-who are you?” she murmured softly, and I realized that it was the first time she had ever spoken to me. It was also the first time I heard her gentle voice.

“I’m Alexander. I brought you here. You’re hurt.”

She shook her head and a hand touched her ribs over the towel, “I’m not hurt anymore.”

I clicked my tongue and took another step, but this time she moved away. I really must have scared her. But if she could smell me the way I could smell her -

“Nonsense! I saw what those things did to you. You’re hurt and you should be in there.” I pointed at the bed.

“I swear I’m fine.”

I was not convinced. She was probably playing it down and I didn’t have time for games. “Show me then.”

Her jaw dropped and her hand pulled tighter on the piece of the towel that was tucked in at her chest. She frowned, but saw the determination on my face. “Let me get dressed first.”

I took a deep breath and nodded before I walked out the door, when I realized something. I turned my head and grabbed the handle. She was standing in the very same spot, and I chastised myself mentally for being harsh on her.

“What do I call - I mean, what is your name?”

“Valerie.”

I closed the door with caution this time, in case I startled her even more than I had already. I blamed her potent scent for messing with my head and took a seat on the couch to recollect my thoughts. In an hour, James and Misha - my two fallen members - would be laid to rest with a proper ceremony. There was no way that I would make it for the ceremony, but if I drove out in time, I would make the burial. A part of me wanted to forego both just so that I could stay here and watch her - Valerie. A sweet name for a sweet girl.

The light screech of the door hinges made me snap my head up in the direction of the sight for sore eyes. Valerie now wore a flowing blue dress I recognized belonged to my sister, but I had never imagined that she’d look like a goddess in something as simple as my sister’s clothes. Her dark brown curls, still damp from her shower, clung in parts to her face and the soft ends touched her bare delicate shoulders where the dress hung off. I blinked hard, willing the blood that coursed through my veins into my manhood to stop in its tracks or I would do the unthinkable. I clenched my fists as my mind fought with baser instincts, then unclenched the second I realized that Valerie was already cautious of me.

“D-do you want to see?”

I got to my feet before the full question left her heart-shaped lips. She extended her arms so that I could see that the purple and blue blotches that flawed her smooth skin had completely disappeared. Frowning, my eyes followed the curves of her body and settled on her torso.

Valerie closed her eyes and turned her face away as she peeled the bodice of the dress down, exposing one cupped breast. I forced myself not to linger too much, and forced myself to look down. And to my surprise, her smooth skin was just that; smooth and flawless, as if the night before was just a figment of my imagination. On impulse, I reached out and touched her, just to make sure that my eyes weren’t deceiving me. Not even a scar or bump to prove that she’d been on the brink of death.

“How?”

“I don’t - I don’t even know.”

“It’s a miracle Val!” I bit my lip when I heard my own mistake out loud. “Valerie.”

Her eyes locked with mine, and I swear I saw her bite her bottom lip as if coaxing me into the clutches of her sweetness. My hand still flat on her skin, I felt goosebumps erupt into my palm. It was as if she was staring into my soul, her nostrils flaring as she inhaled and I hoped. No, I prayed that my own scent grew as intoxicating to her as hers was to me. I inched forward, and call it ‘saved by the bell’ or disturbed by the insistent ringing of my cell phone, because Lord only knows what I would have done if I’d felt her lips just once.

“I’m sorry.” I pulled my hand away reluctantly, “I have to take this.”

Valerie only nodded as she lifted the dress back up so she was decent. I sensed how awkward it must have been for her, and quickly turned to answer the call.

“I’ll be there in fifteen.” I assured Adam when he cursed at me for being the reason why they delayed the service.

“Valerie, I have to go.”

She looked too vulnerable, arms behind her back and watching her feet as if my having to leave pained her as much as did me. If my duties as Alpha didn’t matter to me as much, I would have turned my phone off and taken her into my arms. But I had to go. So I left without another word, turning back to look at the door of room 205 as if I had left my heart back there.

The Mystic Moon Pack Elder, Silas, said a few words for the family we had lost. We drank a mixture of rum and opium from a shared canister before the burial; a ritual that was thought to give us the strength we needed to say goodbye. My strength lay between the four walls of room 205 at The Lafayette, so the need to weep wasn’t as strong as the others. It wasn’t that I was a coldhearted bastard. It had taken me years to find my mate, and now she was mine. I had to make her mine in every sense of the word, and I knew that doing so would open her up to me.

As we gathered at the foot of the woods, and called upon our wolves, the fury of his powers overtook me. So did the fierce desire to go back. But we needed to feed tonight as part of the rites, so I led my pack to a herd of deer grazing nearby. My appetite was far less intense than the appetite of a healthy, human male.

“I need to leave.” I called out to Adam.

“Right now?”

“The rites are complete.” I bit off a chunk of flesh from the deer I shared with the Beta just to affirm my stance. I didn’t need to listen to him.

“The blood offering?”

I bared my fangs and snarled at him. How dare he challenge me!I knew my duties more than anyone in this pack, and owed him no explanation. I called out to the rest to go back to the den, and narrowed my eyes at Adam, lifting my jaw and towering above him. He whined and lowered his head apologetically, then followed the rest.

As we made our way back, the scent of my mate grew stronger. I renounced the emergence of her intoxicating perfume to the heightened senses of the wolf, and wondered if she felt the same. What would she sense when she invoked her wolf in front of me? Did she find me irresistible? If I went back now, would I kiss her lips and make her mine? She already is mine, I told myself. I just had to make it official. The fact that she’d healed so miraculously only made it easier to picture what that meant. If I closed my eyes, I could already imagine what it would feel like to have her soft curves pressed to my body.

The Carnwennan dagger - its silver engraved with the very same marking of the wolf that each of us bore on our shoulders - was passed around as we stood over the sacrificial basin in our human forms. We sliced our palms and offered each a drop of blood to Mother Selene for the release of James and Misha’s souls, as well as good tidings for those who remained. With the ritual complete, I bid my farewell to the rest of my pack and invoked my wolf to get to my car faster.

Valerie’s scent remained in my airways all through the drive back, even though hours had passed since she’d been close to me. The nagging need to get to her as fast as I could had me stepping on the gas as if my life depended on it. Even though she was healed, I couldn’t help but remember her vulnerable eyes just before I’d left. I would give anything to have her look at me that way again. Not because she was in pain, but because she needed me as much as I needed her. Only this time, she would do it in my arms, preferably naked, as I manifested the burning desire throbbing through my entire being into physical form.

The lift was occupied, so I took the staircase, skipping two steps at a time, even bumping into an old man and neglecting to apologize. My mind was set on what I hoped to achieve tonight, and by the end of the night Valerie would profess her love to me. The thought alone swelled my chest with pride. I had finally done it, when all hope had been lost. I had found my mate.

I swiped the keycard in the slot and burst through the door, calling out her name. The living room was empty, so I knocked on the bedroom door. But there was no answer. A shiver ran down my spine as the hint of the worst possible scenario came to mind. A relapse.

With fear dowsing my baser desires and draining the blood from where it pulsed to my core, I pushed the door open. Both the room and bathroom were empty. I rushed back to the living room like a mad man, as if I hadn’t already passed through, and called her again. The only response I received was my own voice echoing against the emptiness. STill, I persisted, going back and forth between the rooms and calling her until my voice grew hoarse and my throat felt dry.

Eventually I gave up. I tried finding an explanation as I dropped onto the couch, and failed. I shouldn’t have left her alone. If only I had stayed, I wouldn’t have lost her.

I just lost my mate.

Valerie was not where I’d left her.

I just lost my mate.