30THEAThree years ago...Is it wrong to fall in love?Wait. No, my thoughts doesn't really only revolve on that simple question since my life is as complicated as a puzzle that's hard to solve.My question is more like.....Is it wrong to fall in love with a thirty-four year old man who has three sons from his previous failed marriage while you're still seventeen who works as a stripper and a private escort?Seventeen years of age gap.It sounds more complicated whenever I think about what has been going on with my life lately.After that night with Mr. Skarsgard, I was planning on not seeing him anymore because he was different among the rest and it scared me. He drove me home so he knew where I live. After we had sex, we showered together and we talked on my way home. He asked me what club I worked for so I answered him the place. He asked me if it was okay that he will visit and probably watch what I do and I said yes he can. I even told him he could meet and see new women from t
31BENEDICTPRESENT TIME...I have done so many things for her and I am eating this meal that doesn't even taste that great. It's like I'm eating tasteless foods but I'm still eating it. I usually scold people who serves me foods that taste as ridiculous as this but I'm enjoying it. I usually get mad because I find this disrespectful, yet I am eating it what Thea cooked for me. I just can't believe that she makes me do things like these that I don't even want to do and things that I haven't even done before.All I thought about was to make sure she was okay and that she wasn't feeling to hot because of her fever. To be honest, I worried about her right when that security guard told me rhat Thea wasn't feeling okay. All of a sudden I felt worried for someone from the opposite sex and I only have that kind of feeling towards my mother and my siblings. But that moment, all I ever thought was to come rushing here and buy her foods or fruits or anything that would help her.I know she does
32THEASEBASTIAN: I'm not giving up not unless you say yes to me :) please have dinner with me this 7?I sigh.I've been staring at his text ever since I received it two hours ago. He asked me to go have dinner with him and promised that it will be safe this time. No entering a closed company but just two people having dinner. I don't need to worry when I'm with him but he's friends with Benedict and I'm afraid that he will see me with Sebastian. I don't want him to think other stuff.It's only an hour left and my shift is finished. Only three days left before the new issue of Lure Mag will be out on Monday. I have so many things to look forward to and I have been trying to keep myself busy after a week of what happened between me and Benedict inside my home but when I reach my apartment all I see is the scene of how I pushed him out of my apartment.My phone vibrates again inside my pocket and of course it was Sebastian.SEBASTIAN: I'm picking you up after work? Please please have d
33"I want you to meet my date Benedict. This is Thea." Sebastian gestured to me.I don't know if I should smile at Benedict because his facial expression shows that he seemed displeased of what he his hearing and witnessing."Thea, I'd like you to meet the Alpha wolf of the pact, Benedict Saintclare." Sebastian says.Sebastian leans to my ear and whispered, "Have you interviewed him? Now would be a great time."Sebastian smiled. He was nice despite having that bad boy look that everyone sees him. He's caring and thoughtful. Bad boys should be mean, grumpy and moody but he's chill most especially when he's with his friends. I could see how he loves dearly these men on this table. I could see how he enjoys his time spending with them. I could see how close they are and it's beautiful to see this kind of friendship.I nod. "I did.""So Miss Thibault." Benedict's voice caught my attention. Now he sits right across me next to his beautiful blond.So I'm Miss Thibault again. He's setting b
34It has to be him. He has to be in the same elevator while I'm also heading back up to the rooftop.Are you playing with me, Jesus? You're making everything more awkward for the both of us. Most especially, for me. I have been trying my best to avoid him and yet you play with me.He stands there perfectly and handsomely as he leans his butt against the elevator's wall with his hands inserted inside the pockets of his slacks. His green eyes met mine the second the elevator opened while he looks at me under his eyebrows. Both of us froze when we saw each other unexpectedly and we were just silently staring at each other. I wanted to get in and ride the elevator with him but at the same time I don't want to because I'm too scared to be around him. I might say words that will hurt him again. Actually, I want him to go up first to the rooftop and then I'll take the other trip.When the elevator door was about to close, Benedict was fast enough to press a button which made the elevator's
35BENEDICTI sit on my favorite chair at home, the spot close to my infinity pool, after leaving Sebastian's party while I look far ahead in the view. After that incident inside the elevator and confessing to Thea, my mind was blank and at the same time I was tired even if I didn't do anything but I was damn tired. I was tired of everything that happened tonight. My heart felt heavy too.Why?Because I'm jealous of Sebastian.Yes.He's the potential boyfriend in every woman's dream because he is boyfriend material. As for me, I'm the potential fuck buddy or one night stand and women doesn't want a man like that.Fuck.He's a strong believer in love, growing old together with the one he loves and starting a family of his own. He's Romeo. He's a bad boy but he loves love. But I'm not Romeo. I don't like sugarcoating things. I don't romanticize. I don't give flowers, chocolates, teddy bear and other shit to impress women. I impress women through sex and that's it. That's the huge differ
36THEASebastian's car finally pulled over in front of my apartment but even if I was with him the entire time, I was still thinking about Benedict the entire time. Those words that he said to me before he left is still stuck inside my head."Because I think I'm already in love with you Thea Thibault."Please let that be just a joke."Thea?"I turned my attention to Sebastian who has been looking at me for a while now. I smiled at him but I wasn't really paying attention."I have been calling out to you but it seems like you're thinking about something else. Are you okay?" He asks curiously.I nod."Of course. Yes. I'm okay." I faked a smile.He smiles back calmly. "I thought something was wrong. So do you have any idea why Benedict left the party without telling me?"I gulped."Umm... No." I lied.I went quiet for a while. "I don't know. Sorry."He nods. "I have been trying to call him but he's not picking up."I think Benedict is mad at me. But I didn't do anything wrong. Did I? He
37THEAI froze when I was holding my fork when Benedict said those words unexpectedly.For a second, I dropped my jaws because I was immensely shocked, but quickly clipped it back together once I recovered. His eyes were looking at me intently, sorrily and sadly as if he had done somethint terribly wrong. That's when I knew he was serious with what he was telling me.He is willing to give way for Sebastian.I ran out of words with what he just said and all of a sudden I felt sad for no reason. I felt sad but I didn't know why. I felt sad even if I know I should not be. I know I should not feel sad because what he said just means he will not fight for me. It simply means that he will stop annoying me, he will stop asking me for more dates and he will stop persuading me to give him a response to what he feel. He will stop seeing me. He will stop coming over here. He will stop everything because he wants Sebastian to chase after me.Benedict will not fight for his love for me. The thoug