I wake up with a raging headache and groan. I can see it's dark outside, meaning I slept all day. Which I kind of expected. When I got home yesterday, I had trouble falling asleep without Roman. That, and I simply couldn't turn my mind off. I kept spooking myself into thinking I was being watched by one of the vampires. Have they been watching me this whole time? Just waiting? Waiting for me to become available to snatch me up?
I snap myself out of my thoughts and get out of bed before I can freak myself out all over again. Roman's scent is barely in the room, meaning he didn't come to bed either. I sigh. I could really use him right now to calm my anxiety, but I won't bother him. I look at my phone, 8:24pm, ugh. I'm going to be up all night now!I get out of bed to shower but I can't get this whole thing out of my head. Even while I'm standing in the hot water I don't feel relaxed.'Amara, you need to read that letter from mom. It might tell us something' Tamisra telI felt it before I heard it. I was finishing up some extra sparring, when the entire ground shook violently, causing all of us to fall on our asses. Then a growl so deep and sinister filled the air, paralyzing everyone except me. I looked around at my warriors frozen and unconscious on the ground, the realization that only a demon's powers could cause this hit me. Amara. Not even a second later I see her jump off her balcony, a black mist carrying her body to the tree line where she shifted into her wolf before she took off on foot at a speed unknown to the creatures of the Earth. I didn't waste any time, calling Adonis and my own demon powers forth. I took off after her.Even in my demon-wolf form I couldn't catch up to her. She ran straight through trees, boulders, and foliage, turning them all into dust in her wake. I could feel my ears start to bleed as she let out howl after howl of pure agony and hatred. Though, the pain in my head was nothing compared to the pain
Sparks. Intense sparks, dancing across my skin are the first thing to pull me towards consciousness. I slowly start to come to. My sense of smell is the next thing to come back and I'm overwhelmed by lavender and bamboo, like Roman's scent, but a million times more intoxicating and intense. It surrounds me, like I'm bathing in it. As soon as I realize what's happening, my eyes snap open and I shoot up. I must startle Roman because he is immediately wide awake. As soon as my eyes lock with his, the bond snaps into place."Mate." I whisper, my hands trembling for a second. Then I'm instantly overcome with a hunger for him that's so intense, I need him, I will die without him. I jump at him so fast that I barely even realize what I did and smash my lips against his. When he takes control of the kiss, I growl and push him back. I look at him, my eyes clouding over with a black hue"Amara, baby, come back to me" he whispers, running his hand up and down my body, grabbing my bre
I blink my eyes open, no idea how long I had slept for again, but it didn't feel like very long. It took me a second before all the events of yesterday hit me. Overwhelming sadness flooded me, my parents...tears pricked my eyes."Hey hey, it's okay baby" Roman coos, interrupting my thoughts. Oh yeah, I had my walls down. I put them back up and he frowns at me"Put them back down" he says, narrowing his eyes at me."No." I answer coldly. "What time is it?""10am" he says, I nod. I don't remember anything after I was running in the woods up until I woke up before, but I feel different. I felt different when we had sex but I was too distracted to notice. I have a pretty good idea of what happened"I broke the barrier spell?" I ask him and he nods'Tami? How do you feel?''I feel...I don't know. Stronger, but weird, it's like a weird buzzing. It's hard to control, we need to get it under control' I don't respond. Well my brand new dad will come crawlin
I know she's hurting, I can feel it. I can feel her guilt, her anguish, I can feel the worthlessness she feels. But we have to deal with this now, I can't lose her. We both shower in silence, me washing her and her washing me. I can feel her love through the bond too, which is a nice little silver lining in the turmoil of her feelings.Once we're done, we head downstairs to my office. I already linked Seth and Aston to be there. Max would be doing training today so I'll fill him in later. He's not up to speed on everything, considering he doesn't even know I'm a hybrid. When we walk into my office, Aston, always the dimwit, speaks."Hey Luna!"I have to laugh because I feel confusion, anger, and then realization run through her emotions. I guess she forgot she was mated to an Alpha. She glares at me and I pretend to choke on a cough, very unconvincingly.She cracks a smile, but any amusement she had dies the second she locks eyes with Seth. Guilt. Overwhelming gu
After Roman dropped me off with the girls, I'd done my best to try and simply hang out with them, to talk with them, to enjoy their presence. But the darkness swirling inside me didn't let up, I had to count my breaths a couple times when black started to swirl into my vision. They had asked me a couple times what was wrong, noticing that I wasn't my usual cheerful, goofy self. Each time I'd simply smiled and said all was well, just that I was missing my mate. They nodded in understanding, but they didn't actually understand. They would be filled in eventually, by their mates, or in Violet's case, by Gemma or Roman himself. I wonder if they would fear me. I wouldn't blame them if they did. I feared me, feared what I was capable of.When I couldn't take it anymore, I stood up and went back to Roman's room, saying that I was feeling unwell and needed to lie down. They probably knew I was lying, but they didn't protest. Tami didn't say anything, I think she was actually trying to
Me and Roman have very different definitions of what a cottage is. This looked like a fairy godmother's mansion. It was beautiful, don't get me wrong, but it wasn't a cottage. It was a gorgeous light stone house, it did have that cottage feel to it with its triangle shaped entrance, but it was...exquisite. I could see the garden wrapping around the entire house, stopping only at the porch. Different kinds of trees surrounded the property, but my favorite was the willow tree in the front yard. The porch was adorned in different plants, some hanging, some potted on the ground, and others from the garden that grew onto the porch. I must have looked starstruck because Roman laughed before he scooped me up again, and walked towards the front door."This was my mom's house originally before she moved into the packhouse. She loved gardening, I always thought maybe she was part witch. After she died, I had one of my earth witches, Paloma, come and help out with bringing the garden back
When I wake up the next morning, the bed feels empty and Roman's scent is faint. I groggily open my eyes, and confirm he is indeed not in bed with me. I'm confused for a moment before the smell of bacon reaches my nostrils. I sit up in disbelief, there is no way the big bad Alpha is cooking me breakfast. I throw one of his shirts on and walk downstairs. My eyes widen at the sight before me. He's standing shirtless at the stove, a dish towel thrown over his shoulder, a pile of pancakes and bacon next to him, Red Hot Chili Peppers is playing on the speaker and he's singing along. I admire the sight, how long did the Goddess have to spend sculpting this man to perfection for me?"You know you're supposed to have a shirt on when you cook, right?" I tease him as I walk up to him and wrap my arms around him"Good morning to you too, and that rule is for humans who cry over a little tiny grease splatter burning them." he says leaning down and kissing me"Well you're not allo
We spent 8 days at the cottage, the extra day happening after Amara used her tears and a couple other parts of her to convince me to stay. But unfortunately, we have to get back to regular life. Aston, of course, whined like a little baby whenever I told him we were staying one more day. We spent pretty much the entire 8 days having sex, and occasionally Amara would train. She actually would execute anything I had her do perfectly, so in reality we could have dived a little deeper into the training, if we hadn't gotten distracted. Yeah, we might have ended up fucking in the backyard a couple times. Now, after the run back, we're just walking into the packhouse"I'm gonna go find Violet! I'll stop by your office after." Amara says to me and kisses me quickly before running off. Ok then, I guess she isn't too upset about coming home. I chuckle and walk into my office.My eyes nearly jump out of my head when I see the pile of paperwork sitting on my desk. Fucking Aston! Did h
Surrounded by Violet, Serena, Cici, and Sophie, I look at myself in the mirror as Aylin finishes my makeup and Gemma does my hair. Aylin must hold more magic than I thought because she managed to cover up these bags under my eyes. I almost look like I did pre-motherhood, minus the breast pump milking me like a cow. Remind me why I insisted on having my Luna ceremony, the equivalent of my wedding, after I had Delaney? Because I wanted to drink at my own ceremony? It seemed so logical at the time. Now, I wanted to go back in time and slap me upside the head, Aylin style. Delaney screams in Sophie's arms in protest at how long it's taking me to pump. In the hospital, the nurses and pediatrician on the postpartum unit said she lost too much weight by the time she was 24 hours old. It was before my milk supply came in, so they put it down to lack of production, but when I filled up a syringe with colostrum, they had a lactation consultant come see me. She had said Delaney's latch wasn't ef
Three weeks laterI breathe through another contraction. They're coming every five minutes now, but I didn't exactly feel like going to the hospital just to be sent home for another false alarm like I did last week.'Uh, you going to explain why I feel like I'm being ripped apart from the inside every five minutes for the last two hours?' I hear Roman's voice come through my head as I feel the contraction start to come down'It's still early labor, probably. No sense in going to the hospital yet, if it even is actual labor.' I tell him'Alright, well, I'm coming back in and getting the hospital bag, so we're ready. The books said once they're every five minutes, we should think about heading in,' he reminds me.I don't respond just as I'm hit with another contraction and suddenly feel like I peed myself. Oh, good Goddess, here we go. I put my walls up so he doesn't have to feel anything.'Scratch that, my water just broke,' I say, and not even twenty se
One week laterThat's precisely what we did. We had funerals for those that wanted their loved ones buried and ceremonies for those who opted for them to be burned on pyres. Aston, being a ranked member, was burned on a pyre with the entire pack present. We put some of his ashes in an urn necklace for CiCi and then released him into the river.While I've seen Roman tear up, or get choked up, that night, he cried with his head in my lap. He fell asleep after hours, and I didn't dare move a muscle all night. My heart was already broken for him; Aston was Roman's Sophie, but something about seeing my brooding Alpha mate break down like that killed a piece of me.CiCi wasn't doing any better; one of us was still with her almost all the time. I spent a couple nights with her, but mostly Serena was staying with her since they were always connected at the hip anyways. It was an effort to get her to eat or even go outside, but I wouldn't give up on her; both she and Aston des
Roman's POVI hated battle, but I hated the aftermath even more. I made a list of all the fallen I could identify, so I could visit their families later. The ones I couldn't, their family or packmates who saw them fall would have to report to me, and I'd go from there. Max and Seth took Aston's body to the morgue before we were even back.Fuck that hurt. My best friend since we were in diapers, the one who evened out mine and Max's broody demeanors with his stupid ass jokes. Gone. Fucking gone. What was the point? The point of all this death and destruction?I stopped in my tracks, shutting my eyes as they became glossy. His death will gut me until the day I die. The day I die? I'm immortal. Fuck. I could live another thousand years, and I wouldn't have seen him for over nine hundred and fifty of them. How is that fair? And CiCi. I have yet to find anyone who wasn't of Alpha blood, or royalty in Armaros' case, that lived past the first year of their mate dying. But we
I watch in horror as Silas grabs Adonis' face, Silas' red eyes glowing into the night, and Adonis...Adonis goes limp. I waste no time before concentrating on Silas' body and start burning him. He screams, and Adonis goes absolutely feral and proceeds to rip his own body apart. I pull my powers back immediately, and they both stop thrashing. Adonis' eyes are glowing red now, and terror, like no other, seizes me when Silas grabs him by both ears, twisting his neck, and Adonis does nothing to fight back.I look to my father, who is holding his own against the group of vampires attacking him, but can't help me or be distracted without risking his own life. Then, I look around for Aylin, Az, Seth, or anyone to jump in and help, but no one is around."No one is coming to rescue you this time, my sweet Amara," Silas hissesI only stare at him and then at my mate. Maybe...maybe...I slam my mental talons into Roman's mind, but he only whimpers and starts to thrash again.
It's been four days, and Roman's shadows still haven't found any evidence of Silas moving toward his home; it looks like he will be coming to us. He's been rallying all his people into one spot; even people from his kingdom were seen moving out, so everyone is on edge, including me. I suggested moving in once he had them all together, but Roman said it's better to let him think he has the element of surprise, and it will give us the "home-field advantage." I wanted to just get it over with; the stakes are so much higher now. Given that we're unsure if he will lead with those half-Kudde beasts he made, Roman had the security system expanded so my family and I would have time to take off and neutralize that threat.Thayer, Dahlia, and all the troops he planned to send are here. Roman called and updated him on the situation, and he said he'd rather come now if an attack is imminent, so they could get familiar with the land. It was no question whether or not we would be atta
"Let's hear it then. Start with his kingdom's main territory.""His kingdom is not far from here. While he does have armies there, their numbers could be better, and they're his lowest-ranking soldiers, all of his best he took with him. Since he's been tracking Amara over the last couple of months, his favorite Duke has been in charge over there. Outside the wall of the castle and its main village, you'll find crowded poverty. He allowed his people to starve, telling them it would start wars if we hunted humans, wolves, or fae after they stopped donating blood to us. In reality, he cut off all contact and trade with them, allowing his people to believe they were trying to starve us out. That's how he got most of his willing soldiers initially. From there, he made life for anyone who was his soldier comfortable. If you fought for him, you and your family could move over the wall, where you were given the bare minimum food and housing."The room falls into a disgusted silenc
I was finally discharged after my next ultrasound. My powers and Tamisra returned about two hours after my first ultrasound, so I insisted I was ready to go home. But considering it was already eight at night, Roman and the nurses convinced me to stay. I'm at least allowed to eat again, and goddess, I'm fucking ravenous. I feel like I can't eat enough. Roman and the nurse, Jess, tried to get me to slow down, but at my ultrasound, Dr. Crowen said as long as I can handle it, I should eat whenever I want to keep up with baby girl's growth rate.Speaking of, she gained another two ounces overnight. It didn't sound like a big deal to me, but I have no knowledge of anything in the medical field. Dr. Crowen said it was very significant, given that wolf pups are expected to gain two ounces weekly at this stage. Everything points to me going into labor at the end of the month, which I don't want to think about.But this isn't exactly something I can just block out. Thankfull
There's a knock on the door before it opens, and the same person who took me to my MRI, Justin, I think, comes in with a wheelchair. After my MRI, they brought me to a different room with a bigger bed that looked a lot more annoying to move.Honestly, I could have walked. Now that my supernatural healing kicked in, I feel fine. Starving, but fine. The doctors said I have to eat very slowly to get my digestive system working properly again and that if I ate an entire jar of peanut butter like I wanted to, I would just throw it back up immediately and feel like shit. So, my new best friends were crackers with peanut butter and a side of chicken broth."Hello again, Alpha, Luna. Dr. Crowen is ready for you in the ultrasound room," he says as he locks the wheelchair.I sit up and swing my legs around to get out of bed. Immediately, Roman and Seth jump up, trying to help me. I roll my eyes."I told you both, I'm fine!" I say, getting up and sitting in the chair