The weight of what I'd just done crashed over me like a tidal wave. My breath came in short, sharp gasps. "Hey, slow down," Astor said, catching up and gently grasping my arm. "Are you okay?" I turned to face him, my vision blurring. I tried to focus on his face, but panic clawed at my throat. M
I was exhausted. I’d heard people say they were bone-tired, but this went deeper than my bones. It was like my panic had reached inside of me and sapped something vital straight out of my soul, leaving me less than a whole person should be. Once the worst had passed, Elroy picked me up and carried
I shook my head, feeling torn. “I know I have to do better,” I said, “but a full day? We were so close to a breakthrough, and the victims can’t afford to just wait--” “If the situation were any different I’d be ordering you to take three days of bedrest and stay out of the office for a week in tot
Sunlight streamed through the gauzy curtains, warming my face. I blinked groggily, stretching my arms above my head as consciousness slowly returned. I’d told Elroy I needed a nap, and clearly I was right about that given how much better I felt already. I let myself come to slowly, then turned to
Some time after Elroy left and I finished my breakfast, I decided that ‘bed rest’ could be fudged a little bit. It would be fine for me to get out of bed if I was just going to get in the bath, right? The Pearl Room had an incredible claw-foot tub and I had been looking for the opportunity to take i
The idea of my child resenting me was heartbreaking. If this all really happened, then what would my baby know about me? What poison would Elroy and Rita tell them, if I was never there to prove my love? That was the last straw for me, and I curled into myself to cry. It was just too much. Astor a
I wanted to laugh. He loved me? We barely knew each other, the only time we’d ever spent together was done for the investigation, he’d never reached out to me or me to him. He dared to call that love, just because he learned how to tolerate me? My heart sunk. This wasn’t really about me. Astor did
Elroy’s POV After the monumental fuck up that the morning had been, the last thing I wanted to do was leave Olivia for even a second. I was thinking about her the entire end-of-quarter treasury analysis, and I was all but jogging back to our rooms when I was stopped by fucking Rita. She smelled
“So the baby looks good,” the ultrasound tech said, “exactly what we want to see at this stage. 2.47 inches long, so right on track. Do you want to hear the heartbeat?: “Yes,” I gasped, suddenly desperate for it. I needed that proof, that evidence that my child was alive, that connection—The tech
I hated medical facilities. I hadn’t always—I used to be fine with doctors’ offices, but after months of painful, pointless fertility treatments that I didn’t even need, the smell of antiseptic brought nothing but dread. It didn’t help that I was in the exam room with Elroy, another constant cause
The golden gate leads to freedom. That was the message hidden in the song, our supposed clue. None of us had any idea what the fuck it meant. Frankly, we didn’t even know if the message was meant for us, or that it had anything to do with the disappearance of the band members wife, or any of the
And my baby would always have me. Nothing Elroy or Rita or Astor or the council could do would stop me from making sure of that. "The Pearl Room," I murmured as we entered my office. "I want it different. New." Jordan paused in her ministrations, her expression determined. "Consider it done.”
Olivia’s POV The shattered remains of a crystal vase crunched beneath my feet as I walked through the Pearl Room, my hands trembling and my chest heaving. The once-pristine sanctuary now lay in ruins, a reflection of the chaos inside my mind. I wanted to keep screaming, keep ripping and smashing,
"How could you?" I snarled as I pulled back, my mind swimming in a cocktail of confusion, hurt, and fury. "We’re Mates—I thought things were getting better!" And wasn’t that just the kicker? I really thought we were getting somewhere, becoming closer, turning into partners who could have each othe
Elroy’s POV After the monumental fuck up that the morning had been, the last thing I wanted to do was leave Olivia for even a second. I was thinking about her the entire end-of-quarter treasury analysis, and I was all but jogging back to our rooms when I was stopped by fucking Rita. She smelled
I wanted to laugh. He loved me? We barely knew each other, the only time we’d ever spent together was done for the investigation, he’d never reached out to me or me to him. He dared to call that love, just because he learned how to tolerate me? My heart sunk. This wasn’t really about me. Astor did
The idea of my child resenting me was heartbreaking. If this all really happened, then what would my baby know about me? What poison would Elroy and Rita tell them, if I was never there to prove my love? That was the last straw for me, and I curled into myself to cry. It was just too much. Astor a