Chapter Five

A little calmer, she carried the tea tray through to the sitting room. Jeremy was standing with his back to the fire, his legs splayed apart, cigarette between his lips. A faint haze of smoke permeated the atmosphere. 

Penny paused in the doorway, the picture striking her into immobility, it was as if she were seeing a stage set and most important of all, she knew that it was absolutely right. It was just as she had imagined it would be that afternoon when she realized her little flat needed a masculine presence and the smell of cigarette to make it complete, perfect. As suddenly as it had come, every trace of Penny's nervousness had left her. She felt curiously cool... Mistress of the situation. 

"You look very....domesticated" Jeremy said, coming towards her and taking the tray from her hands. "Where do I put this?" he asked. 

"Anywhere" Penny replied, happiness rising inside her in a bright frothy bubble. "On the table" 

Jeremy put the tray on the table and looked up at her over his shoulder. 

"Are you gonna sit or are you just gonna stand and stare at me?" he asked with a grin. 

Penny simply smiled and watched his thin, long fingers curl round the handle of the little orange tea pot. 

'He has beautiful hands' she thought. 'I will always love his hands'

Jeremy straightened up and handed Penny her cup and saucer. They sat down very close to each other in the sofa and drank their tea without speaking.

"That was wonderful" Jeremy said, and suddenly she was in his arms.

"Oh, Penny, darling" he whispered and rising quickly, he picked her up and carried her through to the peach colored room.

"We don't need a marriage service" she heard his voice as if in a dream. "Carrying you over the threshold makes you my wife"

Penny, eyes shut tightly, lay quietly on the bed where he had placed her, listening to his movements in the darkened room. He turned on the light and a faint light spread through the room, and now Penny could see his face, the dark shadow of his figure moving towards her.

"I want to watch you get undressed" he said, feeling her hands.

Obediently, Penny rose. She slipped her long dinner dress over her head and stood for a moment upright, a slender figure in her brief delicate underwear.

'I'm glad my figure is firm and young'. she thought. 'I couldn't bear Jeremy to be disappointed in me'

As in answer to her thoughts, Jeremy's voice came slow and husky from the other side of the room.

"God darling. You look beautiful. Beautiful" he said.

Knowing that he was watching her, Penny felt a sudden rush of shyness, and she stepped hurriedly out of her lingerie and pulled a transparent night gown over her head. She bent quickly to turn off the light, but Jeremy said :

"Leave it, Penny. The light on you is so lovely."

The shyness remained with her as she walked slowly towards the bed and slipped in between the smooth linen sheets beside him. 

The embarrassment was hideous.

"Are you alright?" Jeremy asked. 

Penny conjured up brightness to cover the oceans of humiliation. "Yeah I'm fine. I'm just really really nervous you know—"

The words were crushed under his mouth as he hauled her against him, his hands rough and his body hard.

"You don't have to be nervous. You are perfect" He spoke the words against her lips and his eyes blazed hot into hers. When she didn’t answer, he took her mouth, his kiss rough and demanding. His movements were jerky and unsynchronised and yet the desperation in his touch was more erotic than any of the smooth, choreo graphed movements of their previous encounters. The hands that dug into her hair shook slightly, and when he yanked at her nightie he fumbled in his desperation to strip her naked.

"How does this—?" he began.. Impatient, he tore it from neck to hem and she gasped, excited and nervous at the same time.

"Jeremy—" 

"I want you." His mouth was at her throat. Her head tipped back and her nerves exploded with heat. "I want you so badly …." His hands were rough as he scooped her up and deposited her on the bed but she revelled in the desperation she sensed in him.

For once, he wasn’t in control as he always seemed to be. This was about a primitive, elemental driving force that transcended everything. It was just about the two of them. And an explosive physical attraction like nothing she’d ever felt before. It felt real. It felt right.

His hands were in her hair, his hungry mouth awaking feelings so intense that she shook with the force of it. She ripped at his clothes and he helped her, his mouth still on hers as he tore it off so that she could touch him. And then he was crushing her against the bed. His fingers skimmed her body, exploring her intimately until fire licked through her veins and heated her skin. And she touched him too, fascinated by the dip and swell of muscle, by the contrast of sleek and rough. 

Sounds mingled in the night air. The swish of the sea on the beach, a soft sigh from low in her throat as his touch grew more intimate. The pleasure rose to burning excitement, every part of her trembling and quivering as she writhed in a fever of anticipation.

And then he was above her and she sobbed in desperation as she felt the hard heat of him against her. With a single thrust he filled her and she gave a sharp cry of shock because it was so much more than she’d anticipated. Holding herself tense, she was aware of his harsh breathing, of the tension in his powerful frame as he forced himself to hold still.

"Penny—"

"I—I’m OK … it’s OK. It's just been so long" she said. But she was afraid to breathe. She closed her hands over his hips. "Don’t stop. I don’t want you to stop …."

His head dropped to her shoulder and he paused for a moment, buried deep, his breathing unsteady. Then he lifted his head and his eyes burned into hers.

"Look at me." he said. And she did.