Sophie . . My stomach churned without mercy as my eyes locked with his—maybe nausea, maybe nervousness. His eyes softened, more like weakened. Clenching his fist, he squeezed his thumb. Although my heart pounded, it felt as though it might fail me any moment from now, with the way my chest burned. Alex exhaled and brushed his face with his palms. “I don’t even know how to put this.” “Put it in any way,” I responded. His eyes met mine again. “Remember I told you I was drugged.” I nodded as my hands sought solace from each other, clasping above my thighs. “It's an illegal drug; a banned drug, and I’m suffering from the side effects.” He leaned back on the chair, still squeezing his thumb. Side effects. My mind wandered to his panic attack. I bounced my foot; maybe I could generate a warmth that could melt the chill that had coursed down my spine. “What are the side effects?” There probably would be more. "I can’t remember all the side effects that Benjamin told me.” He rub
Alex . . The unintrusive white light bounced off the white walls. My eyes fixed on the digital clock, and my fingers drummed on the black visitor’s chair in the doctor’s office. The sterile scent hugged the air, yet it couldn’t hug me. No matter how hard I searched, I couldn’t find calmness. Guess anxiety and calmness can’t coexist. My phone beeped. Reaching out for it, there was a message from Sophie: “Tell me you are already at the hospital.” My lips broke into a smile, and calm warmth hugged my chest. It’s been a week since we gazed at the stars, and I could tell she wasn’t as distant as she was. If I knew watching the stars with her could have this effect, I would have done that years ago. The shutter of my phone’s camera disrupted the silence for a moment as I took a picture of the hospital and sent it to her. “I didn’t ask for a picture; a yes or no would have sufficed.” Another message came in. Despite the cold reply, another ripple of warmth still shot th
SOPHIE..Romi and I strolled down the aisle, our eyes fixed on the colorful array of products exhibited on the white shelves partitioning the supermarket. Our ears fixed on our conversation, filtering out the low chatter from other customers.Romi’s voice bubbled with excitement. “You and Alex almost had sex?” She dropped the red box of chocolate back on the shelves and picked another—a blue one—before she tossed it into the shopping cart. I blinked at her, resisting the urge to press her neck until she took my predicament seriously. She never took anything seriously. “I still don’t see the problem with that.” We proceeded down the aisle, and she took some packs of biscuits and placed them in the cart. “Besides, he is the father of the child in your stomach.”I exhaled the air that tightened my lungs. “But something happened.” My voice softened, and my eyes fell to the dull gray tiles that floored the supermarket.“Oh my gosh. You had sex with him.” Turning 180 degrees, her voice
Sophie..I don’t think my heart had ever pounded like this in my entire twenty-five years of living. It was as though a never-ending pit had been dug in my stomach. “Sophie.”My name echoed before I snapped out of my reverie. I faced Lucy sitting on the other end of our office desk. “Sorry. Yeah. Any problem?” A yawning escaped me.“So I was thinking of changing the design here.” She turned the laptop over to face me. “Like we should add some cultural elements to it.”I leaned in and drew the laptop closer to me. My weary eyes scrutinized the work. I stifled the burning liquid that threatened to crawl up my stomach. “Are you alright?” “Yeah.” I managed a nod.Alex’s voice filled the hallway, and my breath quickened as I tried to take in a lot of air to support my lungs. Lucy’s eyes were glued to me, and I tried to regain my composure. I was still trying to calm the rumors in the office. What if I tell Alex and he behaves like typical Alex, showering me with protectiveness? What
Sophie..“I’m done with the meeting. Let’s see.” My grip around my phone tightened, and if I had more strength, I could have snapped the phone in half. A painful smile crawled up my lips as I mocked how stupid I was. Well, I should end this once and for all. “Let’s meet at your office.” I texted back.If only my steps were as fast as the way thoughts ravaged my mind, maybe the walk to his office wouldn't have seemed any longer than usual. Time seemed to move slower and the air, thicker. I pushed the door open, and Alex’s soft blue eyes pierced through me. With the anger killing every emotion in my veins, flutters still dared to breathe life into me.“Sophie, are you alright? Alex asked with that voice that planted beautiful flutters, with the tone that made me cling to his foolish, blissful words.Crease lines formed on my eyelids as I tightened them, attempting to kill them—every flutter, every weakness. That’s the only way I could end this. But when I opened my eyes, they fell
Alex..“Are you sure this is the right place?” I questioned Benjamin for what felt like the fiftieth time. Benjamin had been taking turns for the past hour, and I swear, some of the streets did look familiar like we were here some minutes ago. A smirk descended on his lip as he took another turn. “We should be close.”I rolled my eyes and leaned back on the chair. My eyes fixed on the pale streets. This wasn’t the best part of Brooklyn. The atmosphere was gritty and lively but worn out. The narrow streets were lined with aging brick buildings. Hardship shrouded its hostile light over this part of the city.“Still not going to tell me, what put you in such a grumpy mood?” Benjamin glanced at me. “Just drive,” I said with a gruff tone. A lot of thoughts flooded my mind. I hadn’t even processed what happened with Sophie—her request, what she actually wanted to tell me—when Benjamin called and said we needed to meet the man Mia had been paying. Hours had passed by. Images of Sophie—
Sophie ..Before my doctor’s appointment in the hospital, I leaned on the walls of the hallways—a part where I could smell the quietness. My phone was glued to my ears, and my other hand was wrapped around my body.“I’m so sorry. I promise to follow you the next time. Work has been so hectic.” Romi kept apologizing; guilt chipped more and more at her voice. I tapped my foot against the floor; the soft, rhythmic thud echoed in the hallways. “We are both adults entangled in our own lives, I understand,” I remarked with a low, weak tone.“You sound happy. Did you tell Alex about your pregnancy?” Flutters of papers came from the other end, and I could tell she was still busy. Two days had passed since that day in Alex’s office. It's like I have been carrying a heavy weight on my chest. I don’t know if it was hope or disappointment. My chest tightened for a moment as I remembered that day. “No. Something came up. Cathy happened.” I scratched my forehead before wrapping my hand around
Alex..Benjamin and I strutted into my company. The air was filled with murmurs and footsteps of workers. “Good morning, sir. Good morning, sir.” A blend of female and male workers echoed as they passed by.I nodded acknowledging their greeting and returned to the conversation Benjamin and I were having. “I checked the file yesterday, and something was off.”“I thought you checked it two days ago.” Benjamin chipped in.I raked a glance at him. “Maybe if we had caught that man and I was able to get answers from Mia. I would have been okay enough to go through the file.” My voice tightened. Benjamin smiled. “You are still not out of your grumpy mood.”I rolled my eyes. “I have two weeks and five days to call off my engagement; I don’t know how to go on with that.” My throat tightened as I remembered the scan pictures of my son, and it felt so real like the pregnancy wasn’t some kind of joke. “The mother of my child drugged me, and the only way I could get answers without minding the