1

Where I am?

It's the first thing I think of when I open my eyes. I am in a totally white room and the light coming through the windows damages my eyesight. I have something on my nose that makes me hear my breath harder and something that pricks my arm. It is a dropper. I try to move but my muscles don't respond, I can't even lift my head from the pillow on the table.

I'm in a hospital. But what am I doing here?

At that, a nurse enters the room with a bag of transparent liquid in her hand, but when she sees me, she makes a surprised face and runs away.

How weird.

I focus all my attention on moving the fingers of my right hand, one by one, but voices interrupt the room. They are my mother and her new husband.

My mother sobs when she sees me and hugs me, drenching me with her tears.

Jim is crying too, I can see it, but he immediately wipes his tear with the sleeve of his shirt and smiles at me. It could be said that Jim was not to my liking at first, I remember that I just wanted my father to come back, and now my mother was going to have another man in her life. She was going to replace dad. Then I realized that they really were in love, so I accepted their relationship.

But seeing them cry in front of me makes me even more confused.

I do not understand anything.

- What ...- I am interrupted by myself when I am forced to cough, my throat is too dry and my voice comes out hoarse- What am I doing here?

- I can't believe you woke up- My mother takes a handkerchief out of her pocket and sucks her nose. She has huge dark circles and red and puffy eyes, I guess she has been crying. She looks ten years older than her the last time I saw her. The last time ... What was the last thing I remember? I feel my mother's hand caress mine. - You do not remeber anything?

I take a while to answer but I'm still too confused. My mind seems to be in a trance.

What has woken up? How long have I been asleep?

-Do not- I shake my head and lick my lips with the tip of my tongue. Jim watches the scene sadly from behind my mother. I don't think she dares to say anything. - I want to know mom.

-Oh honey ...- she caresses her face and then gives me a motherly kiss. - Everything will be fine, you'll see - but I feel that she is lying to me, I have a bad feeling inside me, a huge void that tells me that something is not right.

They've been testing me and giving me recovery medication all day and I'm feeling too tired so I decide to go to sleep.

I insisted that my mother and Jim go home to sleep now that they could be calm. Nobody has wanted to tell me anything about what happened all day, everyone tells me that first I should get enough rest, but I am beginning to get impatient and my head does not stop spinning thinking about everything that has happened to me.

I sigh and turn off the light bulb that illuminates the room.

I'm about to fall asleep when suddenly I start hearing noises. I slowly open my eyes and see the silhouette of a man, standing with his back to me, walking towards the door of my room. He has a very broad back and is tall. My heart begins to beat stronger.

-Who are you?- I mumble, squinting to capture more details. My voice seems to surprise him and he turns. I don't have time to see his face because he immediately runs out and jumps out the bedroom window.

I gasp and try to get to my feet as quickly as possible, but my legs don't respond well. I have them rigid and I can hardly move them.

I finally manage to get them off the stretcher and with some effort I stand up, but they weaken me and I feel tremendous dizziness. I hadn't gotten up from the table yet, which explains my inability to walk, but I still do it as fast as I can to the window, dragging the dropper and then leaning out. Then I realize that I am on the second floor. I look around the outside of the hospital hoping to see who it is, but there is no one there anymore.

I go back to the stretcher and lie down, hoping to fall asleep again, but it's impossible. I can't stop thinking about who that boy who had jumped out of the window was and what he was doing here, adding the fact that I am gnawing the desire to know what happened to me.

So I remember some of the typical words used by my mother:

"The hospital is poorly organized. There are too many employees during the day, some of them spend their day doing nothing and still get paid. And then on the night shift, there is no one to watch and they always pick me in case there is some emergency"

I remember her complaining every time she got the night shift, as she is a nurse and happens to work here at Middton Hospital. I always felt unhappy because she was the only person who had to put up with Mom's complaints, but I see that she has finally served me well.

I get up from the gurney again and look at the clock on the wall: four thirty in the morning. I have an hour and a half to go get my file, read it, and go back to the room without anyone seeing me dragging the damn dropper with me.

I leave the room and check the dark corridor, there is light on both sides, but when I see a nurse pass through the back on the right side, I decide to go the opposite. I go barefoot and I feel the cold that the ground gives off contrasting with my feet, but it comforts me to feel something new, I have the feeling that I have slept forever.

Once I get to the bottom, I see to my right the reception on the second floor with the receptionist in her position. I can't cross without her seeing me.

I wait against the corridor wall without making the slightest noise while I think. I wish I had my best friends here, when we were little we always played spy and sneaked into the house of Mr. Benson, my neighbor, and although in the end we were always caught, we had a good time.

I have a somewhat risky idea but it could work. I go back a bit down the hall and enter the room where the cleaning supplies are kept, sneak inside and grab three cans of cleaning products with my free hand, then go back to the end of the hall dragging the dropper and lean out again.

The receptionist is going through some papers, her head bowed, and her eyes are closing. I take the opportunity to pick up one of the products and throw it with all my might towards the opposite side of the corridor where I have to cross. It causes a great noise and the poor receptionist jumps on her place with a scared face. Right now I want to laugh out loud but I can't. I see that she is bending down to get something and I take the opportunity to launch another of the boats. The poor woman gasps in fright and leaves her workplace.

-Who's there? -I hear you ask as she walks away, I'm sure I'm going to check what the hell is going on.

She lifted the dropper from the floor and entered the front desk to find the keys to the filing room. Once I find them, I run through the corridor until I reach the other end and bend down to put my spare cleaning can on the floor.

I keep walking until I reach the end and then I turn right again and just outside the front door is the file room. I put the key in the lock and turn it as slowly as possible so as not to make noise, and once inside I close the door and turn on the light.

I type my name on the computer and my medical history appears immediately. I open it without thinking more and start reading.

Lailah Gazt… 

There are several mentions of some allergies and the arm that I broke as a child, I keep reading below until I get to where I wanted to go.

Multiple bony bills, including the left arm and two ribs; several muscle tears and severe stroke from a severe blow to the skull caused by an unknown object ... 

I swallow hard. Has all this really happened to me? I don't know if I want to continue reading.

... caused by a car accident, along with two other subjects, which caused a three-month coma.

I blink several times and check if I have read it correctly or if I have the wrong history. But I see that it's me.

I've been in a coma for three months.

I close all the tabs, turn off the light, and leave the filing room, locking the door. I go back the way I came and once I am at the reception, I go to talk to the woman.

-Excuse me- My voice makes him shudder- Doesn't she have a calendar around here?

She looks at me with the face of few friends, surely she is wondering why I need a calendar at this time of the morning. While she looks for it, she leaves the keys to the files behind a flowerpot on the counter and without saying anything hands it to me. I look at the date that indicates.

September 3.

The tears threaten to come out but I hold them back. So I go back to three months earlier, the accident must have been in June.

I remember little by little and day by day my last days in high school. Until I find the key.

The tears threaten to come out but I hold them back. So I go back to three months earlier, the accident must have been in June.

I am remembering little by little and day by day my last days in the institute. Until I find the key.

The end of year dance.

-Are you all right dear? -the lady asks me from the counter, I must have a horrible aspect for her to look at me with that face of compassion.

I shake my head.

-Can I make a call, please? - She nods and hands me the landline of the hospital. I dial Alison's mobile number, but no one answers.

I decide not to call again so as not to wake her up, she always gets in a bad mood when someone wakes her up. So I decide to call Jason. I wait a few seconds until the fifth ring picks it up, confused.

-Who calls me at this time? - he asks with an annoyed tone.

-Jason, it's me Lailah.

Nothing is heard on the other line.

-Is this a joke? Why is she not funny- he says, almost offended.

-It's no joke, I'm calling you from the hospital. -A few seconds later, he answers him, releasing a big sigh.

-Oh my God, Lailah. I can see relief in his voice, maybe some disbelief. - Is it really you?

I laugh at his amazement.

-Yes, I woke up yesterday but nobody wants to tell me anything.- I explain. I feel the gaze of the lady at the counter on my neck.

-I'm going there right now. What room are you in?

Visitors are prohibited at night, so Jason could climb the same place that I suppose the boy who had jumped out of my room window moments before must have climbed. Because I can't explain any other way that he entered other than that, since being on the second floor he is not very high either.

But of course, I can't tell you all that in front of the lady, so I use a game that we used as children to speak in code.

-Jason, extreme sauce soaked little utensils have great reviews but really love them. Second for the spider, he has no friends. Two hundred eleven.

The lady at the counter looks at me as if she has gone crazy, I offer her a smile and hand her her phone, thanking her, and then return with the dropper to my room.

But what I've really told Jason is:

"You can climb, second floor two hundred and eleven"

It is a simple word game where you say random words and only take their initials, except for numbers or proper names. As children we played here in the hospital when my mother worked and there was no one to take care of us, so we knew the hospital by heart.

I wait about half an hour where I take the opportunity to stretch my arms and legs when I hear some noises. I look out the window and see my best friend's brown hair crawling up the pipe.

-Oh, Romeo. -whisper. He raises his head and smiles.

-Oh, Juliet. -He responds looking at me hopefully.

Once upstairs, I help him pass through the window. He stands in front of me, looking into my eyes with fascination and a halo of sadness. He runs a hand over my face and then pinches one of my cheeks. I frown, I don't understand what he's doing.

-Tell me I'm not dreaming- he murmurs. I lift my arms carefully and wrap them around his shoulders, hugging him.

-You are not dreaming- I whisper to him.

I notice how his arms surround me and he sighs. When we part, his eyes are wet.

-You remember? -Refers to the accident. I shake my head. I do remember something, but they are blurry memories.

-I woke up yesterday and did not understand anything, a few hours ago I went to the archives room and looked in my file. Two broken ribs and one arm, bruises, tears, stroke, and a three-month coma.

I recite it to him as if I'd memorized it- What happened, Jason?

His eyes get wet. A tear slides down his cheek and I wipe it away with my thumb.

-It was the day of the end of year dance. The three of us were on the way in my car, singing a song at the top of our lungs, distracted, when around the corner, a car coming from the opposite direction crashed into us. -Breathe deeply.- My car gave a full turn, my airbag jumped and prevented it from going off but ... 

His voice and hands are shaking. I don't like where this is going.

-Keep going -I encourage her. Although a lump begins to form in my throat.

-But not yours. You hit your head against the glass of the car and I couldn't see anymore because I lost consciousness, but I know you appeared outside the car.

I close my eyes and the images I remember from that day come to my mind. I already remember. Tears begin to fall down my cheeks, as does Jason, causing us both to cry.

-And Alison? - I ask, hoping that she's okay.

Jason doesn't answer me, he just stands there, looking guiltily into my eyes.

No ... no ... I shake my head. Taking out of this the thoughts that cross me and that do not carry anything good.

-What happened to Alison, Jason? -I repeat again. I hear a sob from his side and he rubs his eyes. He still does not answer me and I feel that something inside me breaks, I have a huge lump in my throat that does not allow me to swallow saliva and my legs are weak.- No, right? 

He already knows what I'm asking him and he nods.

-No no no. Jason no, please. It's impossible, my best friend can't ... She can't ... - I'm unable to say it.

Right now I just want to hug her and for her to tell me another of her stupid phrases, for her to discuss anything silly with me, or to force me to wear makeup. I don't care about everything, I just want to see her, I want to be with her.

-She didn't put the belt on, she didn't put it on and ... she shot out - Wait a few seconds. My breathing is failing at times. I feel like I can't breathe. A huge beep starts ringing in my ears- This is all my fault. I'm so sorry.

A swirl of darkness clouds my vision as the air I should inhale runs out.

-Jason. - It's the only thing I can say before my legs give out and I fall to the ground in a faint.