Legacy World 4.16 The Issue With Vanora's Aura

When Vanora woke up the next morning, BaoBao immediately informed how much time had passed.

/I slept for eight hours?/ She groaned inwardly. She did not like sleeping for that long. So, she immediately pushed herself off the bed. However, her body protested. /It doesn't feel like I slept for long though.../ While half of her wanted to get on with her day, the other half just wanted to curl up in a ball in the bed. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths to compose herself and get back her motivation and determination to carry on.

/Let's just get it over and done with. The day will be over before I know it./

Once ready, she woke Vlad for him to let go of her shirt. They went through their usual morning routine, with Vlad trying to strike up a conversation as well. This time, however, Vanora was colder and more detached than usual. Vlad assumed that she was still upset with him, so he decided to give her space. Having learnt from his mistake, he stopped bugging her, and intended to only speak when the opportunity presented itself. When he teleported, he even restrained himself from taking more liberties with her. He merely onto held her hand.

During her morning practice, Vanora quickly realised that her power had dropped back to the state it was before she fought the furless bear, then Vlad. /What's wrong with me?/ She frowned while she stared at her hands.

"I didn't know that having your own emotions power your strength was only temporary." She stated without looking up from her hands.

"It isn't. It shouldn't be." Vlad replied, knowing that she was actually asking a question.

Hearing his confusion and surprise made her even more confused. /Then why? Do I HAVE to keep my emotions heightened?/

"I've been meaning to ask..." Vlad cocked his head. "Are you... By chance, suppressing your emotions? Your aura's dim again. Normally auras stay stable. I've never seen someone's aura waver this way before. Or is there another reason for your state?"

Vanora stared at him with a poker face then looked away without answering his question.

Vlad raised his hands defensively. "I'm only trying to troubleshoot what might be the cause."

After another short silence, Vanora finally replied in a soft voice that was almost a whisper. "I know."

[Vanora? Is there something wrong?] BaoBao finally plucked up the courage to ask her, since Vlad had broken the ice.

/This world's much more vexing and tiring in a way that I didn't expect.../

[Vanora...] BaoBao felt very bad that he could do nothing to help her feel better besides cheering her on.

/Don't worry, BaoBao. I'll be fine./

She closed her eyes and readied her heart and mind for what was to come. Normally, she practiced almost mindlessly, with her full focus on the actions she took and what to execute next. This time, she allowed herself to think. She allowed her mind to wander.

While she went through the familiar motions, negative thoughts burst forth like it was the most natural thing to do.

/This won't do./

/This isn't enough./

/Still not it./

/Inadequate. I'm just no good. Why do I bother? No matter how many times I do this, I'm never good enough. I'll never be good enough. Who am I kidding? I'm tired. I'm sure anyone else can do this better than me. I'm a failure and I'll always be a failure. Dad, Mom, Big Brother, Erica, WHY? Why do you still love me? How do you still have hope in me? I don't want to let you all down. I know I will, but I really don't want to. What should I do? How can I get stronger so that I won't have to rely on anyone? I-/

Vanora suddenly froze with her body lit up by her hellfire. Her eyes were open wide in shock.

/I haven't improved at all. I've been relying on someone from day one. BaoBao's always here for me. I needed LongFei's help in the previous world. And now I'm relying on Vlad in so many ways. I knew it. I can never make them happy and proud. I'm scum./

Tears sprung forth, but Vanora tried her best to hold them back. Her hellfire expanded without control and hit Vlad who thought that he had been standing out of her range.

Vlad sucked in his breath sharply out of surprise and pain. Her hellfire hurt a lot more than usual. He knew that she was acting strange but still thought it better to ask, "Vanora...? Did I perhaps do something wrong...?" He said with an awkward smile while he gestured to his left leg that was still on fire. 

However, Vanora still stood frozen in the same position with the same spaced out look.

"Vanora?"

He finally noticed, through the raging hellfire, that her eyes were watery. He immediately checked in on her emotions while he dove in to interrupt her practice. "Vanora, can you hear me? Vanora?" He cupped her cheeks with both arms.

Vanora gasped as his face suddenly filled her entire vision, and his hot hand warmed her cold face. Realising that everything around her, including Vlad, was burning, she immediately called back her flames.

"Vanora, you did it. Your aura's at its peak form. You found out what the issue was?" He intuitively encouraged and praised her, thinking that the source of her unhappiness was her strength.

Vanora looked at him but felt tears coming back up. His face only served as a painful reminder of how pathetic she was. Afraid that she could not hold her tears this time, she quickly looked away. /So what if I figured out the problem? I can't even control myself now. What a joke. I hate this. I hate me. I hate it./

She balled her hands as tight as she could. Her nails dug into her skin but she did not care. Her jaws were clenched so tightly that it hurt. Taking slow and deep breaths no longer helped because she could not empty her mind as usual. She had no idea how to maintain control while feeling so much. Was it even possible?

/Ah... This isn't good. I should just move on and fight those darn angels./

She kept her head down and away from Vlad while she spoke, careful not to reveal how she felt in her tone, "Let's move on to the angels now."

"Without eating?" He asked with a frown.

She nodded. He thought of insisting that she should eat something, but everything about how she was right now signaled that this was not a good time to push her. So, Vlad quietly and obediently took one of her clenched fists into his hands. While he held it tenderly, his thumbs gently stroked the back of her palm.

Meanwhile, BaoBao was completely lost and distraught. The barrage of negative thoughts had taken him by surprise. Although he had caught glimpses of it before, he never expected the full blow to be so debilitating. He understood the need for it after adding her current performance to his database, then identifying a trend. [So this is what she meant... What can I do...? Is there anything I can do to help her?]

When the fog cleared up, Vanora noticed that they were in a forested area that she did not recognise.

"There are angels nearby. We'll join in the fray whenever you're ready." Vlad explained.

"Let's go." She said, still without looking at him.

"Follow me." He sprinted off and she followed closely behind. 

They soon reached and stopped at the edge of the forest to observe the fight in the large clearing before them. Three angels were fighting an equal number of dark orange ogres. Everyone was around two meters tall. A sparkling white dome-shaped barrier protected the three angels inside it. They held hands with their eyes closed, while they continually chanted something that Vanora did not understand. Something odd about the demons intrigued Vanora. "Is the reason why the demons aren't finding other more accessible targets related to why they're glowing white?"

"You're right." Vlad looked disgusted. "Those angels are doing what they call purification of our souls. Sounds nice, but it basically kills us. Doesn't matter how far they run from the angels. Once you're afflicted, it will continue to weaken you until the one who inflicted it is killed."

Vanora nodded, then sprinted off without warning. Although Vlad was a beat slower than her in taking off, his teleportation allowed him to arrive a moment sooner. The demons stopped in confusion to see someone they did not recognise. However, once it registered that the newcomers had no angel wings, they roared in excitement. Just as they wanted to continue bashing the barrier with renewed fervor, Vlad ordered, "We'll settle this. Go back up another area."

The demons found themselves unable to disobey, and so left the scene.

Vlad stood to one side with the intention to observe Vanora's battle, ever ready to lend his assistance if her life was threatened. Unexpectedly, he turned to see Vanora already punching the weakest spot of the barrier. /She figured it out so quickly? Or was it her enhanced instinct?/

When Vanora arrived at the battle scene, she did not think too much about the combatants nor paid attention to what Vlad was doing. She only had one thing on her mind - To break the barrier and kill the angels. She moved without much thought or plan. This was a very different and new style of fighting for Vanora. However, it proved to be effective. After a mere few punches to the top of the barrier, the first crack appeared. Although her skin stung from the contact with the barrier, it was a worthy exchange. More cracks appeared with each successive punch. The angels relaxed, but focused, expressions finally changed. The stress they were put under showed on their faces. Once the barrier shattered into white sparkles, the angels split up to surround Vanora who landed on the ground where they had been at. Without wasting a second, they faced their palms at Vanora, then chanted to begin the purification of her soul. While they did that, Vanora also wasted no time in randomly choosing one of them to be her first target.

Vanora's speed shocked the angel, but he still managed to dodge her punch. Vanora immediately followed with a kick to the angel's head. Unable to keep up with her flexibility, the angel's head got smashed to smithereens.

When Vanora moved on to the next angel, there was a warm itchy feeling inside her. It was annoying because it was an itch one could not scratch. As annoying as it was, there was also a sedative effect. Her energy and emotions were gradually draining away. She gritted her teeth in frustration and knew that she had to finish this as soon as possible.

The second angel had better reflexes and was more nimble, so Vanora had a harder time catching the angel. The angel was obviously pulling Vanora further away from the other one. Something told Vanora that she could end this immediately if she used her hellfire, so she did. Her hellfire traveled through the ground, then shot up like a pillar, completely catching the third angel within it.

A sharp agonising scream filled the skies. It shocked the angel facing Vanora so much that Vanora got a clean strike through her chest. As Vanora stared at the second angel falling to the ground, she realised that she was still glowing white. The agonising scream was also ongoing. She looked back at the angel who was convulsing on the floor in pain. When they made eye contact, the angel shouted angrily, "What a sadistic and cruel power this is! You're so horrible!"

Vanora reached her in one leap, then peered into her eyes with dead expressionless ones. "Yes. I'm horrible." She whispered. Vanora's gaze felt so consuming that the angel forgot about her pain for a short moment. When the angel's body convulsed uncontrollably again, Vanora stomped down on her head and watched it burst like a smashed watermelon.

Hearing a slow clap behind her, Vanora glanced at Vlad from the corner of her eye. He was walking towards her with a very pleased expression. "You did very well for your first kills! Your first contribution to the war! Marvelous!"

[Vlad's right! I was worried because your thoughts seemed a little jumbled and distracted during the fight. But it all turned out great in the end! Did you already get used to your enhanced instinct? Ahhhhh! You're so awesome!] BaoBao could not help but gush over her as well.

/There's nothing to be happy about. If it was Vlad, he would have finished this in a blink. I'm nowhere near awesome./ "Where's the next battle?" Vanora killed their enthusiasm without hesitation.

[Ya, but... It's not fair to compare yourself to him...] BaoBao said in a small voice.

Meanwhile, Vlad gestured around him. "We're on the fringe of the main fight. We can take our time to clear this area, then slowly move inwards."

Vanora focused on her hearing, but could not pick up any sounds of battle. /I'll just keep a look out while we move./ "Let's go."

Vlad nodded with small smile.

They then headed back into the forest together, where the orange ogres from earlier went.