Working on my last house for the day, it’s the most nerve-wracking one. A married couple with three kids under the age of nine, and the wife has OCD. I know, why would anyone with OCD hire someone else to clean their house? I’ve already caught her recleaning a few areas that I’ve cleaned, but I’ve been working for them for the past two years, so I guess I’m still doing a decent job. The Morrison’s are good people, though, and they have always been really nice to me. Sometimes they ask me to babysit for them, but I always have to pass, because I don’t trust myself around little kids. I used to babysit all the time when I was in high school, but the way my attitude has changed over the years, I don’t want to take it out on any child. I like kids, although I doubt I will ever have any of my own. There’s no way I in hell I would want to bring an innocent child into this fucked up world.
When I’m done with the Morrison house, I say my goodbyes, and then head to the bus stop. I used to drive mom’s old Toyota, but it finally took a shit a few months back, and I have no money to fix it or get a new car. Besides, it’s cheaper taking the bus or walking. I don’t have to worry about gas prices or having the extra money to fix something when it breaks down. I enjoy walking, and when I do have to take the bus, I just keep my head down and mind my own business. Nobody ever bothers me this way and I don’t offend anyone by looking at them the wrong way. Keeping to myself has worked for me so far, no need to change things. Before my mom got shot, she was always bugging me about getting out and hanging with friends or telling me that I need to start dating. Who has time for that when you’re trying to just get through life in one piece? My mom was my best friend for years. After Knox moved away and decided to never contact me again, I had a few close friends, but then we lost everything, my friends were included. So, it was always just mom and me. That is until the shooting. I still think back on some of my younger days when I had a normal childhood. Knox and I were glued at the hip. I know he had it a little rougher with his home life, but I tried to make up for it by always being there for him. I always thought that we would be friends forever. I still remember the words he whispered to me all those years ago. I look down at the twine that I still wear around my right ring finger. It is not the same exact one, I outgrew that one, but I made myself a new one, keeping the original in an old jewelry box at home. I am not sure why I continue wearing it, when I haven’t seen him in about eight years. Maybe it is just to remind me that there are good people in this world, even if they can only stay for a little while. I had ten years with my best friend, and I will always cherish that time that we had together. Sometimes those memories are what helps me get through the lonely times. My thoughts are interrupted when the bus pulls up to the stop. I greet the old driver with a smile as usual and walk to the back of the bus. It is always less crowded in the back, and I can take a quick fifteen-minute nap before I get to where I’m going. I sink down into my seat, and just before I close my eyes, I see a familiar pair of light blue eyes. I blink quick, but the person has already gotten into the parked car across the street. I shake my head and chuckle to myself. It was only my imagination. A lot of people have light blue eyes. Besides, the guy I saw was over six foot and looked mean. I cannot imagine my old friend growing to be that big, or that mean-looking. I relax back into my seat and close my eyes. Memories taking me back to when I once was happy.Walking into the hospital that my mom is at is depressing. It is not the new big one on the other side of the city, that one is for the people who have money. No, mom’s hospital is rundown and in need of new equipment, but it is cheaper. Most of the staff are nice and they seem to know what they are doing, but they aren’t paid as well as the hoity toity docs at the new hospital. As long as my mom gets the care that she needs, I’m okay with it.
“Hey Mama, it’s a beautiful day outside!” I say cheerfully, as I walk into her room. I don’t expect a response, but I like to think that she can hear me, so I always try to sound happy. I drag the chair over to the side of her bed and take her hand. For the next hour I sit and chat away, telling her make believe stories about how my life is going. I don’t know if she will ever wake up, but I don’t want her hearing how sad my life is and making her feel bad about it. So, I lie. Just as I am getting ready to leave, her doctor walks into her room. “Ah, Aria! I am glad I caught you. Do you have a minute?” He asks, hopefully. Dr. Hildreth is a good-looking guy in his mid-thirties, unmarried, and no kids. He is one of the nicest guys I have ever met and has a big heart. He has hinted around about meeting up outside the hospital a few times, but I am not interested in him that way. I don’t have time for guys, and I really don’t want to ruin his soft-hearted nature with my blackened heart. I answer his question with a slight nod before stepping outside of my mom’s room. “What did you want to talk to me about, Dr, Hildreth?” He grins, “I’ve told you that you can call me Steffen. No need to be so formal.” I grit my teeth but continue to be nice, “Oh yes, I forget. What did you want to talk to me about, Steffen?” Me using his name must really make him happy because he gives me the biggest smile, flashing his straight, white teeth at me. “Well, I thought maybe we could get a cup of coffee and go over your mother’s care.” He sounds very hopeful that I am going to say yes, so it doesn’t give me any pleasure to know that I’m going to disappoint him once more. “I’m sorry, Steffen, but I’m terribly busy. I need to head to the diner for my next shift.” I try to sound like I am really sorry, but I don’t know if he buys it. The sad smile he gives me almost breaks my heart, but he seriously needs to give up. He waves his hand back and forth between us, “Of course you’re busy. I should have known better.” Tucking his hands in his pockets, he continues, “I just wanted to discuss your mother’s options again.” I know exactly where this is going to lead to, so I hold my hand up, “Steffen, I’m not taking her off life support yet. I have already told you this many times. It hasn’t been that long, and you said yourself that there is a possibility that she will wake up.” “That was over a year ago, Aria.” He looks sad, “The chances have slimmed since then, and to be honest, I don’t think she is going to wake up.” He then pulls her medical chart out of its slot on the wall by her doorand flips through a few pages, “Her last scan shows that there has been no improvement. I’m sorry.” Instead of standing there and listening to what he is trying to tell me, I turn and start to walk away. I hear him call my name but all I do is raise my hand in farewell, and walk through the double doors, leaving Steffen standing outside my mom’s room shaking his head.I make it to the diner with ten minutes to spare before my shift starts. Patty and Beth are finishing with the dinner rush but they both wave and smile at me as I make my way back to the employee breakroom. There are only three servers and one night cook. Patrick is both owner and day shift cook, and one of the best bosses that I have ever worked for. I rotate shifts with Patty and Beth throughout the week, so we can all have the opportunity to make generous tips during the rush hours. Tonight is my turn to have the more laid-back shift. Not too many customers come in during the night shift unless it is the weekend.
Bobby, the night shift cook greets me with a fist bump on my way back to the front. I really like working here, but only because of the awesome crew. It helps the time go by faster, no matter how dead it is. Even Patrick is fun to work with. He is only in his late thirties, so he tries so hard to remain cool with the rest of us. It is kind of cute in a way. Tying my apron around my waist, I wait until Patty and Beth are finished counting the register and refilling the condiments on the tables. Once they are done, they throw their aprons into the dirty bin and clock out. That is my cue to clock myself in and take a few minutes to catch up with the girls before they leave me on my own. This crew is the closest thing to friends that I have, but I still keep them all at a distance. I feel it is best this way; no need to have more heartbreak when they decide to leave my life like everyone else.It’s Friday. Most normal people would wake up and be happy because it is the end of the work week. Not for this girl. I groan as my alarm starts blaring beside me. It takes me three tries to shut the damn thing off. Finally, I yank the plug out of the wall and the noise stops. It was a late night at the diner after some high schoolers came in and decided to have a food fight. They were sneaky little bastards, being quiet, so they would not get caught. By the time I made my way over to them with their ticket, it had looked like a war zone. I don’t think any of them actually ate. I made them pay and then kicked them out. Lucky for me, Bobby offered to help me clean it up once his kitchen was in order. We were finally locking up by two in the morning. Since it is Friday, the diner stays open until the wee hours of the morning, so the bar patrons can come in for their greasy food cravings. I offered to take Beth’s night shift so she could go out on a date with Erik, a guy she met
After the morning I had, keeping my mind off the disturbing images that are now permanently in my head, is actually not so hard while working the diner. The lunch hour rush was a doozie and now we are heading into the dinner rush. My co-workers got a good laugh at my disastrous morning, and every so often they break out to the Girl on Fire chorus. Why I thought it was a clever idea to tell Patrick and Patty about it is beyond me. I definitely won’t be making that mistake when Bobby comes on shift. “Table nine’s order is up!” Patrick yells from behind the counter. That’s me. I grab a tray and load the four plates on top of it. When I get to the table, I carefully unload the tray. I almost wear the last plate of mac and cheese when the toddler tries standing up on the bench and hits the tray. Luckily, I have been waitressing for years and can handle an out-of-control tray. It doesn’t make me any less annoyed, though. I just put on a smile, and say, “It’s okay, kids will be ki
Of all the days for it to rain, it had to pick my only day off. I usually work at the diner on Sundays, but Patrick closed it down for the day, due to the flu hitting three of the five workers at the diner, himself included. As much as I need the money, the time off is much needed, as well. I have been running myself rugged and need a little reprieve. I allow myself to sleep in until ten in the morning, and then I drag myself out of bed just to sit in front of the television for a few hours, drinking coffee and eating Cocoa Puffs out of the box. By one o’clock the rain has slowed to a drizzle, and I make the decision to visit my mom. Maybe I’ll get lucky and Dr. Hildreth will have a day off. Just once I would like to visit my mother without him accosting me about taking her off life support. I am so thankful that Mr. Sanders fixed the plumbing by the time I got home early Saturday morning. I make quick work washing my body and hair. I do spare a few minutes to shave my leg
Back in my apartment, I let myself drop to the couch face first, “Ouch!” I fumble under my hip and produce my phone. I just lay here in the silent space listening to the traffic outside. A clock is ticking somewhere, not in my apartment, but in a neighbor’s. That is how thin these walls are. There is a cat fight going on somewhere down the street, and a baby crying somewhere. “I hear you, kiddo. I feel the same way.” I realize that I am still holding the card in my hand, so I turn it over and examine it. It is matte black, but the name Scarlett is written in the middle of the card with a phone number below, all in a glossy blood red color. It is sexy in kind of a dark way. I remember the woman telling me that if I ever needed extra cash that I should contact her. I debate on whether or not I should call the number. What if she’s a loan shark? I can’t afford to pay any kind of money back. I can’t do anything illegal either, like sell drugs or be a mule. I shiver at the latt
The bus drops me off a block away from Scarlett’s Treasures at seven-thirty, so I have plenty of time to walk to the auction house and calm my nerves. I don’t know why I am so nervous. I have started new jobs plenty of times in my life. This one should be no different. Maybe it is the unknown part of it. Scarlett wasn’t clear on the phone what the job details are, so I would think anybody would be nervous in my position. The building comes into view. It looks a lot nicer than it did when I googled it. It looks like a really big warehouse except it’s made of brown stone. There doesn’t seem to be any windows in the front of the building, and there is no signage. There are quite a few cars in the parking lot, though, so that can be a good sign, I guess. I see one door at the front of the building, and there is a huge guy with a bald head standing by it, as though he is guarding it. When I walk up to the door, he literally puts his hand up to stop me. I look down at his hand th
Patrick opened the diner back up on Tuesday since both he and Patty were over the sickness. Beth is still under the weather, but because the diner was closed for so long, both Patty and I agreed to work double shifts to help make up the time that we both lost. Things were starting to go back to normal, almost. I still need to find a third job with decent pay. I’m tired of depending on tips. I really wished the auction house were a real auction house and not just a glorified brothel. I’m not judging anyone by any means, I was just really counting on the extra money that Scarlett had mentioned. When I check my phone on my break, there are multiple text messages from Frank, begging me to come back to the bar, and one new voicemail from a number that I do not recognize. I tap in my four-digit code and listen. I recognize Dr. Hildreth’s voice. Rolling my eyes, I am about to delete the message thinking he was going to try convincing me to let mom go, but I am wrong. He wants me t
It is the middle of the week and another long day of working. Dragging myself out of bed, I hop in the shower hoping to wake myself up. I literally catch myself falling back to sleep while washing my hair. How is that even possible? Only getting three to four hours of sleep at night, being on your feet all day, and not eating enough. That is how people fall asleep while washing their hair in the shower. My foggy mirror that the shower steam caused seems like a good representation of my life. I feel like I’m just walking through life without knowing where I am going, because I can’t see where I am going, when I’m in a daze all day long due to lack of sleep. Using my hand, I swipe the mirror, leaving streaks, but I don’t care. Throwing my now dull raven locks up into a messy bun, I proceed to brush my teeth. The face that stares back at me is no longer my own, but a shell of what it used to be. Dark circles hover below my eyes while my cheekbones protrude out due to lack of n
Before I sell myself to the devil, I have to see my mom just in case anything happens. Scarlett is so sure that all will be okay, but honestly, I don’t even know who Scarlett really is, either. I am beginning to have all these doubts about my decision, but I keep tossing them aside. This really is the only choice that I have left. I cannot go on the way I have been. The elevator dings, and the door opens. I greet the desk nurse, as always, and head straight to my mother’s room. The first thing I notice are the flowers. I smile and make my way over to mom’s bed, grabbing the chair as I pass it. Even the room smells nice from the floral arrangement. “Hello mom. I have some news to tell you, and you are not going to be happy about it, but it needs to be done.” I glance toward the door to make sure it had shut behind me and then I take her hand, “I made the decision to sell my virginity. I will be going to the auction house tonight and a buyer will offer me no less than o