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101. The One Where I Unravel
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2023-02-28 03:30:32Related chapters
Always is not Forever 102. The One Where Things Are Different
[ A L I N A ' S P O V ]Words. Too many words. Too many sentences and yet my eyes couldn't concentrate and grasp any of it.Narrowing my eyes, I made myself comfortable with the book, leaned back and took a deep breath. Start again. Forcing myself, I tried to pay attention to the letters inscribed in the second para of the book and was reading through it when again, my concentration halted and I drifted off to some other part, some other nightmare.Why she did it? If she never loved me, she could've said it. Why couldn't she show her real face like Rishi had done? It would have been such a relief to see the reality than the lie hidden beneath it.Had I done something to offend her? Had I come off as a spoiled girl that she wanted to ruin me? Her words reeled back, her actions ran through. Again and again, she turned the blind eye, and again and again, I acted as if she was my mother.Was my love too false? At the back of my head, I knew the truth. Why couldn't I get a bad feeling f
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 103. The One Where I Run Away
"I got the right apartment." But my concentration was on the clothes he wore. What the actual fuck? Who wear formal clothes for a simple working of a gown? Controlling my gasp, I bit my lip to stop the smile. "What are you wearing? Are we going in a party?" Frowning, he looked down at his clothes, shrugged his shoulders. "I was in the hotel." That explained nothing. "Business, bookworm. I wasn't joking about working." "Aren't you feeling hot?" "Truth? A bit, but I can't wear casual in office. People don't take me seriously." "Serious?" I chuckled. "You're twenty-one. Who takes a kid as serious?" Scowling, he leaned at the door. "I'm an adult. I work. And invite me in." "Yes." Stepping back, I allowed him to enter the apartment and pass his gaze through the apartment which was nothing as compared to the one he owned. I preferred a small one. Why have such a big apartment when I would be living alone? "Nice." His words flew out of my head as I took in his blue tailored suit wit
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 104. The One Where I Friend Zoned Him
"I hated them too." That brought my attention to him. "I despised them. Everyone acted as if it was fine when nothing was fine, but Alina, you know what I have learned? That faking everything is fine for a while makes it feel real." He placed his hand on top of mine. "I know everyone flaunts it, but we ignore them. I need you there with me. This is a first time I'm going and I wouldn't have gone if the host hadn't personally invited me. You're not a trophy girl. You have a personality of your own." He flicked my nose. "Remember those days when I was known as Alina Gupta's boyfriend? I still get. Just come. Trust me. I won't make you who you're not. As long my work would be done, we'll leave. It's just a party and we'll enjoy.""There will be strangers," I whispered."I will be there as I said. I won't leave your side like your parents. I won't flaunt you around by putting someone else down. I won't suffocate you. I won't let anyone suffocate you. And you'll be Alina, the same selfless
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 105. The One Where I Shoot
Write, Alina.I ordered, screamed, yelled and shouted those words in my mind but none worked as I tried to further than the word The or the date I had put up or the heading.The blank page stared back at me, waiting to be filled up but my fingers didn't move and I shut the lid of the laptop with a bang. Staring at the silver lid laid on my lap, I threw the laptop across the room, frustrated by my own behavior.Alina, you were not spineless. You were more than what she had said.Irritation pricked and jabbed at my sides as I stared at the almost destroyed laptop and every other document of mine destroying itself if I didn't check it out. Alina, care about it. Your book was in there.But I didn't.I fucking don't care.I wanted to care, but something in me wasn't satisfied with it. Something in me was snapped down to the ground, killing all the urges I had stored in my heart. Something in me felt dead to even breath anymore.Rubbing my hands on my face, I laid down on the bed, staring a
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 106. The One Where We Start Again
"Do you want something?" He asked, lightening the apartment. Shaking my head, I wondered my eyes around the apartment. Three months. I hadn't been here for three months. Automatically, my gaze swept to my room's door. My previous room.I didn't live here anymore.He lived alone.I lived alone.Friends didn't live together as couples.I shouldn't have agreed to come with him after the shooting academy, but it felt tiring to go back to my apartment and lay down to watch the boring ceilings, blaming myself for not doing something productive.Being with him at least divert my mind, but the impact of seeing what I had left three months ago was a blow to my gut.I had thought he would have sold it, taking he wasn't going to come back and I had given my key back to his mother when I had gone to his house during summer vacations.Good thing he didn't sell it. This apartment held too many moments of us.Kabir dropped the laptop bag on the couch. "You should start this." Nodding, I revealed the
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 107. The One Where She Forgives Me
[ K A B I R P O V ]"I'll be there," I talked into my phone. "Is it my mistake the dry cleaner ruined his clothes? Where is the manager?""Just handle it," Jennifer insisted. "Give him an extra stay.""Then convey to the manager," I said harshly, leaning my back on the elevator's cold wall. "Give the guest anything. Transfer him to the presidential suite for a night, gift a white wine bottle and end this. If he still troubles or threatens, then get him another piece of cloth.""Yes, Mr. Oberoi," She clipped.With the ding of the elevator, I walked out to the direction of the apartment and instead of using the key or ringing the bell, I entered the code. "I will come in an hour or so. I can't even stay in college in peace.""You only wanted to join," she sassed. "Your dad said it wasn't easy. You're complaining about this. Imagine him.""What's the status of New York?""Good. Better than the start. No doubt, your dad was shocked by your performance. I will meet you soon.""You can le
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 108. The One Where I Talk It Out
[ A L I N A ' S P O V ]"Can we talk?"Kriti swirled her face to stare at me, the shock apparent visible there. For three weeks, we hadn't talked with each other even though I had shed off the anger. I couldn't carry the guts to go to her and apologize for my behavior on how I had acted with her for past few months.She had nothing to do with my life and past, and I had been venting out on her without caring how she must be feeling. I was back on the track of pushing people out of my life because I thought it was easier that way. Less people, less trouble.But I missed her.Nodding, she stood up from the chair and cocked her head to the door. Sparing a glance at Kabir from across the canteen, I followed her to the benches resting outside the canteen. Sitting next to each other, we avoided looking and stared at the floor.What should I say? How should I confess about the apology bubbling in my throat?Just go for it, Alina. Get over with this."I'm sorry," I said quickly, pulling my
Last Updated : 2023-02-28Always is not Forever 109. The One Where I See A New Him
"Suck in more," Kriti shouted from the back. Glaring at her and the artist, I sucked my breath to create space for the corset to be tied around my back.As Aabha's assistant pulled the strings to tie the knots, I squeezed my eyes shut to ignore the stinging pain wrapping my abdomen."I told you to wear a lingerie corset beneath," The assistant grumbled, fumbling with the knots. "It would have been easier that way."Glancing at the oval-shaped red skirt with a cut in the half starting from my hip to provide space for black ruffles, I tried to control my annoyance. Rich people. Rich parties. And here I had thought, I wouldn't be dragged into that part of my life anymore.I had been avoiding them ever since, only attending where the whole family was invited. I never knew dating Kabir would be like dashing into that world again. I never knew he was part of the world I used to despise. I never cared about it. But as we were growing up, I realized we weren't teenagers and as adults, respons
Last Updated : 2023-02-28
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Always is not Forever 120. The One Where He Proposes
Rubbing my neck with the hand, I felt his presence on my back. "What is he doing here?"I turned to face him. "Kabir--""Alina, no." He cornered me, caging between his body by placing both of his hands on the counter table. "It's ten at the night.""He came. I couldn't say him to leave.""Or you could have said it's not ideal for him to come," He shot back, straining lines visible on his forehead. "You looked uncomfortable. Did he say something?"Nothing just confessed it to me and I had no idea why he thought he loved me when he knew nothing about me except the things I shared in the support group when he had no idea how needy I was, how I seek for attention."No," I whispered. "You got late.""Work." Pranit voice from the hall echoed in the kitchen and Kabir's eyes darkened. "I hate him. When I see him, I see how you said you loved him." But it was a lie. I was trying to hurt you, make you see how you leaving had impacted me. "I know you both have same past," He dragged a shaky brea
Always is not Forever 119. The One Where I Reject Him
"Come again?" Dr. Sha asked, her hands flying from right to left, hitting the ping pong ball with the red colored bat.Hitting with my bat, I tried to dodge her attempts to make me lose a point. "Why are we playing ping pong?""Don't you get bored staying in a room?""Kind of."But this wasn't what I had expected when she called for an outside meeting instead in her building's cabin. I had thought a café maybe, or someplace quiet but she had surprised by calling me to a club and assured nobody would come in this room."Your dad was ready to allow it.""His friend owns the club," I mumbled dryly, the sound of the hitting echoing in the four walls."And he loves you," She pointed out, smashing the ball and before I could hit, it flew from my side. "And you lost a point.""Funny," Grumbling, I walked to one of the corners, picked the ball and started the game again. The sweat had started forming on the forehead, my grip on the handle of the bat was losing, my wrists were aching. What was
Always is not Forever 118. The One Where I Face It At Last
Yawning, I closed my books and stretched my legs. Getting up from the bed, I walked out of the room to find something to eat. Switching on the lights, I found a note stuck to the refrigerator.Food is in the microwave. You were sleeping. Must be hard practice 😝 Ps. Heat and eat.Chuckling at her handmade emoji, I crumbled the note and threw it in the dustbin before opening the microwave and found the plate in it. She never forgot about me. Twitching my lips, I brought the plate out and grabbed a spoon.Cold food was better than hot food and she wouldn't understand that.She wouldn't understand why I had gone straight to the bed after coming back from college, she wouldn't understand how much it was killing to know that how deep secrets we both were holding.Before I could take a spoon, the kitchen walls were invaded by the screams.Alina.Dropping the spoon, I sprinted to her room, opened the gate and saw her struggling in her bed. She hadn't gotten any dreams since she had started s
Always is not Forever 117. The One Where He Knows
"I still think you shouldn't go," Kabir's voice brought me back to present.Shaking my head, I tried to remove the memory. It was before I had started imagining him as Rishi, it was before when we were happy and there used to nothing other than nightmares to trouble our relationship.Now we had to be careful. This careful was getting on my nerves."It's fine," I stated, changing the song on the stereo of the car."Here." He passed me his phone, connected it to the black aux cable. "Listen any you want."Taking his phone, I went through the songs, ignoring the EDMs he loved to hear and settled on something soft to not make him hyper."Now, Dhruv and you. You're traveling too much.""I'm not. He needs me. He's all alone, handling Ria." I curled on the seat. "She's too small. She needs to see people love her despite her father leaving for jobs. And Dhruv deserves a break.""I get you're worried. We all are." He dabbed his palm on the horn. "But look at yourself. You're squeezing your sch
Always is not Forever 116. The One Where I Miss
[ A L I N A ' S P O V ]Gripping the pen tightly, I wrote down the explanation of the sonnet, completing the work that had been due last night. I blamed it on my over-worrying boyfriend who couldn't keep his mouth shut on why I was traveling this much. From past two months, I had been pacing back and forth between Bangalore and Delhi every weekend.He was getting angry.And I was getting pissed.Sighing, I placed the pen between the pages. Just two more lines, Alina and then you could go and shower to remove the aftermath of mediation and yoga."What you writing?" Hearing him, I levitated my head to stare at his face, but then, my gaze dropped to his chest.Where was his shirt? And why the hell wasn't I changing my gaze?Gulping, I paid attention to the white pages, overwritten by my hands. "Sonnet explanation. College work. You didn't go to GYM?""I'm taking a time off for a while," he answered, moving across the kitchen to grab a bowl for himself and picked the milk carton from m
Always is not Forever 115. The One Where Reality Is Out
***"You!" Shouting, I shut the door of her cabin. Jennifer looked up from the files. "In my cabin now."She raised her eyebrows in amusement and nodded. Who told her to tell lies to Alina? I got her teasing on me, I accepted it but feeding lies to her wasn't acceptable. I was an inch away from losing Alina again. Inch away to destroy all the progress we both had made after getting back together.Taking a deep breath, I entered my office and turned to face her. Yesterday, I had spent all my day to get new clothes before selling my old clothes and helping Alina with the packing.She was moving back with me. Good. I could see clearly how she was scared of me.Jennifer stepped in. "Now that's the Kabir I know. Angry and dominating one."Rolling my eyes, I nodded my head to the money placed on the table. "You're leaving India in next twenty-four hours. This is your pay. You're no longer my assistant.""I answer to your father, not to you." She crossed her arms over her chest. "He sent me.
Always is not Forever 114. The One Where The Past Begins
Staring ahead at the scene, I smiled and tapped my fingers on her arm. She turned with a smile and slipped her hand around my waist."I missed you.""You did?""Yup," She grinned. "Don't go again."Laughing lightly, I was about to reply when her figure disappeared from my arms and all I could see was the face of her house perched in front of me. What was I doing here? I was in our apartment, meeting her after a long time.A hand tugged on my shirt. Peering down, I stared at the girl."Kabir, save me." Confused by her statement, I wondered what she was talking about me. "Save me, Kabir," She cried, thumping her hand on my chest. "You promised you'll save me. Save me now."She took a run inside the house. Frowning a bit, I followed her inside, took the flight of stairs and entered the room I hadn't been into for past three years.Wasn't it burned? Wasn't it locked?My feet thumped on the old familiar room, looking for the small girl but, all I found was Alina standing at the corner, sta
Always is not Forever 113. The One Where We Solve
Presenting a smile, I stood up, took the clothes and strode to her bathroom. Shedding the rest of my clothes, I entered the shower and cleaned the disgusting things sticking to my body. When I checked for a shower gel and shampoo, I found the girly stuff and sighed. Looks like I would be smelling like her until the morning.As I was washing my hair, all the previous month we had spent together started biting my places. She was too distant from me. Her words seemed to be held and assessed carefully. Maybe moving in with me would change everything, maybe we would be different then, maybe we would back to our love life.But what about the insecurities? How would I solve them?"Kabir, are you done?" She knocked the door. "Was I too harsh? Is it not removing? Do you need my help?""Yes, it's not removing!" I shouted back, smirking. "Help me.""Tie a towel."Looking around the shower, I grabbed the towel from the upper shelve and tied it around my waist. "Done." My eyes remained glued to th
Always is not Forever 112. The One Where I Become A Joke
Alina's expression didn't change, her hands remained still at her side, her eyes narrowed at me."You're lying." Again, the same sentence. "She saw you without clothes.""I'm aware," I confessed. "Once she came in my penthouse. I was roaming in my briefs and she saw it." Seeing her expression, I added quickly, "I did yell at her for disturbing my privacy. I changed the code too. I didn't know she knew about it. She purchased the penthouse. I should've been aware.""But you kissed her." She clutched the arms of the chair tightly. And that was the reason I didn't want to tell her. "I can't stop imagining when you kissed her." She dragged a long, shaky breath before facing me, turmoil residing in her black eyes. "You wanted to forget me?" With reluctance, I nodded. "Was I that bad?""No, I just love you too much," I replied honestly. "Wouldn't you have done anything to forget me?""True." Standing on her toes, she trudged to my side, caught my face in her hands and inched it closer to he
