We woke up with the sun high in the sky, meaning we overslept again! Shit! I didn’t realize how exhausted we would both be. Tamisra didn’t seem too concerned, so I guess it didn’t throw us off schedule too much, but I really did not want to spend the night in the rogue areas.
‘You worry too much; if we get started now, we can clear the area by nightfall.’
‘Yeah, that’s great and all, but I was hoping we could eat. We’ll need energy if we encounter any rogues, and we haven’t eaten since breakfast yesterday morning.’
‘Fine, I’ll block you out and catch us a quick snack. Any preferences? Deer, fox, maybe a wild boar?’ she said while snickering at me as I gagged. She blocked me out, and I just went to the deep recesses of my mind and curled up.
Now that I had time to let everything sink in, I didn’t feel so broken over this. I worried my mate would still want me if I bore another man’s mark. I would explain everything to him and hope for his understanding. Most people don’t save themselves for their mates; some do, but not all. I had no desire to be an almost 21-year-old virgin, and Felix didn’t care that I wasn’t “pure.” A lot of the men in our packs wanted their women to be pure for them, but no one could really get mad when they fucked around too. Our mates are meant to be the perfect match for us, and if the true mate bond is anything like my mother and Sophie described, the pull is impossible to fight. Chosen mates and rejected mates are scarce because the level of attraction is supposed to be beyond the charts, making it extremely rare to be able to defy a bond. Thinking this made me feel even dumber for not questioning my lack of attraction for Felix.
I kept pondering what my true mate would think and if he would reject me simply for being a dumbass when Tamisra eventually called me to come forward again. God, I hope she at least ran away from whatever she munched on before I take my sight back.
‘I thought about making you see it just to fuck with you, but we’ll be coming up near some rogue camps soon, so I need you not to pass out. Next time though.’
‘Gee, thanks. Ever the considerate one you are’ I rolled my eyes.
It wasn’t long until we caught the scent of rotting leaves and decay. We slowed down, making sure to stay downwind from the rogue camp, and tried to pad quietly through heavily bushed areas, all of our senses on high alert. We cleared that camp, only to be hit in the face with rogue stench even stronger than before, meaning they were closer. We paused, locating the source of the stench to our left. Probably 100 yards away, a sickly-looking rogue was staggering, trying to walk a path. His fur was wholly matted, and saliva dripped out both sides of his mouth. We continued to move, deciding we could easily take him if he spotted us, but he didn’t even react if he heard something.
The thing about rogue wolves is that they lose their sanity very quickly. Wolves are meant to live in packs, and although some rogues collaborate to attack other packs, that still isn’t enough. Being a rogue is dangerous; they’re always a target, even in wolf form, so shifting back to their human form is inevitable suicide. Eventually, the wolf part of us goes rabid, losing all of our humanity. It’s not a life anyone hopes for; rogues are typically wolves who were banished from their packs. It’s infrequent nowadays that a wolf is born rogue. It wasn’t always that way, there would be women and children who were rogues, and it got to the point that there were so many rogues around that if one day they all conspired against packs, it would be an easy takeover. So to prevent this, most packs would give asylum to rogues so long as they weren’t rogue for committing a crime. Eventually, the only rogues left over were the criminals, but they were few and far between. However, that being said, if we encounter one while in these lands, that means it will be a sure fight. I was not a trained warrior, thank you, Red Moon Pack, so my only hope is to get through here unnoticed or, at the very least, not be swarmed. I have enough training under my belt to take on one or two, especially if they’re already weakened.
I’m pulled out of my thoughts when I hear a feral growl right toward where we’re walking, and Tamisra freezes. I see the rogue sniff the air and mentally slap myself for not spraying more anti-scent spray on me, it shouldn’t have washed off because we haven’t been in any water, but clearly, this rogue smells something. We’re practically not breathing when he starts sniffing the area, coming up right to where we’re hidden. I brace myself for a fight when another rogue jumps out of the bush across from us onto this one, and a brutal fight starts.
‘Quick, take off while they’re still distracted! Go go!’ I urge Tamisra
She wastes no time skillfully running through the dense forest we’re hiding in. Obviously, she can’t go too fast, but she’s fast enough to get us away without them noticing. I let out the breath I was holding as we jumped out of the bush and ran through the forest, not smelling any rogues around Tamisra, running as fast as our legs would take her. We run until we scent another rogue way off in the distance and jump back into the foliage. Still moving skillfully so as not to make any noise. We pause again when we can smell the rogue getting closer and wait until he’s walked past us before moving again.
We keep up that same dance for another 2 hours, thankfully never being noticed. Knowing we would soon be on safer lands, Tamisra sniffs the air before jumping out of the bushes again and taking off full speed. We’re so close to being off rogue lands, so close. But then we run straight past a large clearing with a small hideout. I watch their heads instantly shoot up at the noise and start to panic.
‘Run, run faster! They spotted us; if they get here, we’re fucked’
Tamisra doesn’t respond and starts running faster, we both hear the thudding of paws coming in our direction, but we don’t stop. We’re fast and always have been, so I hold onto that and hope it’s enough to get us out of here alive. But apparently, I dream big because I feel someone snip at our ankle a second later. It’s not enough to make us lose our balance, but it slows us down enough for them to pounce on our back.
Everything moves in a blur; Tamisra is snarling and trying to fight back. Eventually, all the other rogues catch up, and we’re swarmed. I close my eyes and wait for death when someone takes a nice bite out of my shoulder, forcing me to shift back to my human form. I scream in pain, feeling my blood gushing out of my wound. I scream louder when I feel my calf in another rogue’s jaws. This is how I die; at least I could see my parents. But as I continue to scream, I feel something snap inside of me, and a cold feeling so intense rushes through my body as I shoot my arms out, trying to get it off me; I feel it shoot through my fingertips, and the ground shakes under me.
Then, everything is quiet. I must be dead. I’m still in excruciating pain; I thought that went away when you died? Fucking false advertisement. This shit still hurts like a bitch!
‘Amara, open your eyes.’ Tamisra says, unamused by my inner monologue.
It takes me a minute, but I groan and open my eyes, expecting to see nothing, or maybe the Moon Goddess Realm; I don’t know; I’ve never been dead before, so I’m just guessing here. But I don’t; what I see before me is utter chaos. Blood is everywhere, and body parts are thrown throughout the forest. It looks like someone set off a bomb in the middle of us. I look down at my hands and rub them together; they still feel colder than any ice known to Earth. What did I do? More importantly, how? I thought the cold feeling was death forcing its way through me, but I’m very much alive, and the rogues are very much unlived.
‘Tamisra, do you have an explanation for this?’ but she seems just as shocked and confused as me as she peers through my eyes and looks at the carnage.
‘I don’t know, Amara…I felt you do that, I felt the power for the split second we had it, but I don’t know what it was.’
Still confused, I go to feel my shoulder and hiss when I touch it. My werewolf healing stopped the bleeding, but it’s still very much an open wound. I look at the rest of my body which is covered in gashes from claws and a couple of bite wounds. They’re healing slowly, but it would probably take at least the night until I’m back to normal. I don’t even think I could shift right now; both Tamisra and I are far too weak. But we have to get out of here; I’ll figure out whatever weird witchy thing I did later when I’m not vulnerable to even the weakest rogue.
I spot my duffel bag and limp over to it. I get back into the bushes and start to crawl through, sending a silent prayer to the Moon Goddess to let me go unnoticed because I am nowhere near as graceful as Tamisra.
She must have heard my prayer because eventually, we get far enough out of the rogue lands to where Tamisra and I feel comfortable enough out of the bushes. No other werewolf scents are around, so when I spot a stream, I hide my bag and go get in it to rinse off. The blood was making me itchy, and the decaying dead leaves scent made me feel like my stomach would swallow my insides and spit them out.
I didn’t bring any soap for obvious reasons, so I spent a long time trying to get the blood off me. Deciding I did what I could, I crawled out of the stream and let the wind blow on my skin to dry me up. It’s sunset now, and I’ll need to find a safe space to sleep if I want to make it through the night. I still don’t think I could shift, and even if I could, it would slow down my healing, so I throw some clothes on and walk until I find a small thicket. It’s probably a deer’s hideout, but I don’t care. Sorry, Bambi, you have a roommate tonight. I squeeze myself in as far back as possible, and I’m asleep before I can even lay my head down.
I don't know how long we slept, no sun was peeking into our little hiding spot to give me a hint, but I didn't care; there was no way I could continue this journey being severely weakened. I move my shoulder, it's a little stiff, but the discomfort doesn't bother me. I try to look at my other wounds, but it's dark in this thicket. My werewolf sight gives me a general idea that they've all closed, though. When I go to get up, I realize there's a warmth sitting next to me. The fuck? Did Bambi come home last night or some shit? The little ball of warmth moves, and I realize it's a cat. It stretches out and then comes up to me, purring and rubbing itself all over me. How did a cat get in here? I knew we were near a pack and not in the middle of nowhere anymore, but I didn't expect to wake up to a cat next to me. But regardless, I pet the little furball anyways."How did you get here, little one? You know I don't have any food for you." I say while scratching its chin. The mention of foo
We're only about a mile or two away from the Ivory Moon's border when Tamisra tells me to shift back to human form and walk the rest of the way. Her legs were obviously tired, but she kept us going throughout the night. I would guess it's around 5 am because the sun is just starting to rise. It would only take me 20 minutes to get to the border, so I shift back and put on some clothes. I probably smell horrible and don't even want to know what's made its way into my hair. I get Nisha out of the duffel bag, and he stretches his legs before plopping on his side. "Seriously? You've been in that duffel bag for how long and still don't want to walk?" I say as I pick him up and hold him in both arms. He meows at me but then starts purring as I pet him while we walk. I eventually can make out the border, where two wolves and a female in her human form are patrolling. Luck is on my side; I thought I would have to wait around until border patrol crossed this way. As I approach, the wolves ra
His ice-blue eyes are cold and calculating. I feel like he's staring right into the depths of my soul. Refusing to show weakness, I hold his gaze, but Tamisra is going crazy in my head. 'Let me out, let me out! I need to see,' she says while pushing her way forward to share my sight. I'm too shocked to shove her back; she never acts like this. Her dark blue eyes must be swirling into my green because I see his ice blue eyes start to bleed brown, showing his wolf must have also come forward. I'm frozen as I take him in. He's all Alpha male, he has chestnut brown hair pulled into a man bun, and the scruff on his face is the same color. His jawline is so sharp it could slice through glass, and yeah I wouldn’t mind sitting on those perfect plump lips. His muscles are clearly straining against his black shirt and I do my best not to stare too hard at those delicious arms I feel my cheeks turn pink because of my dirty thoughts, and Tamisra sending me…interesting images of him isn't help
I watch as the girl and Seth walk out of my office. I was a little taken aback by her; I didn't expect her to be so…interesting? That's an understatement because I want to follow her to her room and listen to her talk in that angel's voice for hours. No woman has ever caught my attention like that before. I've had my fair share, but it was always hookups. I've never had trouble getting a woman; they're always willing to bed an Alpha. I only kept affairs outside my pack, though. That shit can get too messy, and I have way better things to worry about than catfights between pack members over petty love disputes. I pour myself a glass of bourbon while I think about this girl. If she wasn't Seth's sister, I'd be suspicious about her; a fake mate bond is no easy feat. But I didn't detect a lie, and I've heard her brother talk shit on the fake mate plenty of times before he even knew the mating bond wasn't natural. I growl when I think about her and another man, my wolf Adonis only feeding
My eyes flutter open, and I feel like I'm sleeping on a cloud. I stiffen, waiting for Felix to wrap his arm around my waist before I remember my current situation, and I breathe a sigh of relief. I feel Nisha stir and rub his head against my hand, purring contentedly. I sit up, run my hand through my hair, and look around my new room. I notice a cat tree in the corner with a water fountain and cat bowl next to it, and I squint my eyes. Fucking Seth! I would have to punch him later. Obviously, I would follow up with a hug and a thank you, but he has already done too much for me! I get out of bed, skip my morning self-pity ritual, and head to the shower. I take a nice, long, hot shower knowing there's no way Felix will interrupt my peace. I get out and groan when I realize I don't have anything for my skincare routine. Oh well, I'll order some when I'm deemed worthy enough to start getting paid. I walk out in a towel, trying to find my duffel bag, but I'm interrupted by a knock on my d
The anger I felt when I saw that filthy mark on her neck made me lose control. I snapped at her and felt fucking guilty for it. So then I tried to cover my anger with a pathetic excuse about her mate tracking her through the mark and I saw the guilt cross her face, showing me that I only made it worse. Fuck, I’m not trying to show her how jealous am but I’m clearly making her think I don’t give a fuck. Which is quickly proving to be not true. I don’t know what it is about her but when she’s near, I just want to follow. I’ve had two conversations with her, and here I am worrying about her and being jealous. Fuck I must need to get laid. She’s hot, yeah, but there’s no reason for me to be jealous. ‘You like her, fuckwad. That’s why’ Adonis remarks in my head but I block him out, not wanting to deal with his shit. I pick up a phone to make a call to Blair, one of the spirit witches who resides in my territory. Thankfully, her afternoon is free and she’ll see Amara. She’s a powerful wi
"The Alpha didn't give me any specifics, so what makes you require my services?" The witch asks me. I suck in a breath before telling her my reality. I should be used to it by now, given how many times I've had to discuss this, but I still hang my head in shame after I'm done. I look back up at her, and she grabs my hand. "I'm sorry that happened to you; this was a crime against your Goddess that should have never happened," she says before I feel calmness rush through me from whatever witchy thing she just did. My shoulders relax, and I let out a relieved sigh before she speaks again. "Come here; I need to touch your face to feel what kind of magic has been embedded in you," she says before reaching out and cupping my cheeks with her eyes closed. I feel a small buzz sound in my head; it's an odd sensation, but I don't fight it. After a few moments, her eyes open. I see a hint of nervousness cross her face, but it's gone as soon as I notice it, making me wonder if I only imagined
I lead Amara back to the pack house after we leave Blair's. We're both silent the whole way, other than her telling me she'll be in her room if I need her for anything. I wish I said something to make her feel better, but I was just as lost. I wasn't expecting Blair to say it wasn't witches' magic. There are a lot of possibilities on what it could be from then, but the question that remains is why Amara? I won't lie; I'm a little suspicious of her. It's possible that she really and truly has no idea what this is all about; she didn't even hesitate when I told her I was taking her to Blair; she actually looked eager until we found out it wasn't witches' magic. But I saw something cross in her eyes when Blair was talking to her. I've seen it plenty of times, and it looked like she was holding something back. I'll have to keep an eye on her and maybe spend more time around her. Which was certainly fine by me. I was also purposefully avoiding the fact that watching her in physical pain
I watch from the trees as Amara kills the Vampire King, staring at his body like a woman possessed. The feathers of the blue jay I shifted into ruffle in anger as I watch the Demon King, the man responsible for the destruction of my life, approach her and put an arm around her lovingly. I resist the urge to squawk in anger, remembering the loving arms of my own mother. The mother fled the underworld with her twin boys in tow because she was forced to work in the brothels, constantly being denied the position of a castle servant by the King. That was all we incubi and succubi were suitable for sex and slave work, in his eyes. So, my poor mother, unable to bear having her body used to keep me and Axel fed and safe, fled to Earth. Only we were worse for wear there, unable to blend in when we were amongst humans, and no hope of a werewolf pack or Fae court taking us in. So, we build a house in rogue lands, somewhere no sane supernatural being ever ventured to, and no human ever came
Surrounded by Violet, Serena, Cici, and Sophie, I look at myself in the mirror as Aylin finishes my makeup and Gemma does my hair. Aylin must hold more magic than I thought because she managed to cover up these bags under my eyes. I almost look like I did pre-motherhood, minus the breast pump milking me like a cow. Remind me why I insisted on having my Luna ceremony, the equivalent of my wedding, after I had Delaney? Because I wanted to drink at my own ceremony? It seemed so logical at the time. Now, I wanted to go back in time and slap me upside the head, Aylin style. Delaney screams in Sophie's arms in protest at how long it's taking me to pump. In the hospital, the nurses and pediatrician on the postpartum unit said she lost too much weight by the time she was 24 hours old. It was before my milk supply came in, so they put it down to lack of production, but when I filled up a syringe with colostrum, they had a lactation consultant come see me. She had said Delaney's latch wasn't
Three weeks laterI breathe through another contraction. They're coming every five minutes now, but I didn't exactly feel like going to the hospital just to be sent home for another false alarm like I did last week. 'Uh, you going to explain why I feel like I'm being ripped apart from the inside every five minutes for the last two hours?' I hear Roman's voice come through my head as I feel the contraction start to come down'It's still early labor, probably. No sense in going to the hospital yet, if it even is actual labor.' I tell him'Alright, well, I'm coming back in and getting the hospital bag, so we're ready. The books said once they're every five minutes, we should think about heading in,' he reminds me.I don't respond just as I'm hit with another contraction and suddenly feel like I peed myself. Oh, good Goddess, here we go. I put my walls up so he doesn't have to feel anything.'Scratch that, my water just broke,' I say, and not even twenty seconds later, he appears next to
One week later That’s precisely what we did. We had funerals for those that wanted their loved ones buried and ceremonies for those who opted for them to be burned on pyres. Max, being a ranked member, was burned on a pyre with the entire pack present. We put some of his ashes in an urn necklace for Serena and then released him into the river. While I’ve seen Roman tear up, or get choked up, that night, he cried with his head in my lap. He fell asleep after hours, and I didn’t dare move a muscle all night. My heart was already broken for him; Max was Roman’s Sophie, but something about seeing my brooding Alpha mate break down like that killed a piece of me. Serena wasn’t doing any better; one of us was still with her almost all the time. I spent a couple nights with her, but mostly Cici was staying with her since they were always connected at the hip anyways. It was an effort to get her to eat or even go outside, but I wouldn’t give up on her; both she and Max deserved better than t
I hated battle, but I hated the aftermath even more. I made a list of all the fallen I could identify, so I could visit their families later. The ones I couldn't, their family or packmates who saw them fall would have to report to me, and I'd go from there. Aston and Seth took Max's body to the morgue before we were even back. Fuck that hurt. My best friend since we were fucking pups. Gone. Fucking gone. What was the point? The point of all this death and destruction? I stopped in my tracks, shutting my eyes as they became glossy. His death will gut me until the day I die. The day I die? I'm immortal. Fuck. I could live another thousand years, and I wouldn't have seen him for over nine hundred and fifty of them. How is that fair? And Serena. I have yet to find anyone who wasn't of Alpha blood, or royalty in Armaros' case, that lived past the first year of their mate dying. But we would do everything in our power to take care of and be there for her regardless. I wouldn’t let Max’s
I watch in horror as Silas grabs Adonis’ face, Silas’ red eyes glowing into the night, and Adonis…Adonis goes limp. I waste no time before concentrating on Silas’ body and start burning him. He screams, and Adonis goes absolutely feral and proceeds to rip his own body apart. I pull my powers back immediately, and they both stop thrashing. Adonis’ eyes are glowing red now, and terror, like no other, seizes me when Silas grabs him by both ears, twisting his neck, and Adonis does nothing to fight back. I look to my father, who is holding his own against the group of vampires attacking him, but can’t help me or be distracted without risking his own life. Then, I look around for Aylin, Az, Seth, or anyone to jump in and help, but no one is around. “No one is coming to rescue you this time, my sweet Amara,” Silas hisses I only stare at him and then at my mate. Maybe…maybe…I slam my mental talons into Roman’s mind, but he only whimpers and starts to thrash again. “Aht, at. You may be powe
It’s been four days, and Roman’s shadows still haven’t found any evidence of Silas moving toward his home; it looks like he will be coming to us. He’s been rallying all his people into one spot; even people from his kingdom were seen moving out, so everyone is on edge, including me. I suggested moving in once he had them all together, but Roman said it’s better to let him think he has the element of surprise, and it will give us the “home-field advantage.” I wanted to just get it over with; the stakes are so much higher now. Given that we’re unsure if he will lead with those half-Kudde beasts he made, Roman had the security system expanded so my family and I would have time to take off and neutralize that threat. Thayer, Dahlia, and all the troops he planned to send are here. Roman called and updated him on the situation, and he said he’d rather come now if an attack is imminent, so they could get familiar with the land. It was no question whether or not we would be attacked at night
I was finally discharged after my next ultrasound. My powers and Tamisra returned about two hours after my first ultrasound, so I insisted I was ready to go home. But considering it was already eight at night, Roman and the nurses convinced me to stay. I'm at least allowed to eat again, and goddess, I'm fucking ravenous. I feel like I can't eat enough. Roman and the nurse, Jess, tried to get me to slow down, but at my ultrasound, Dr. Crowen said as long as I can handle it, I should eat whenever I want to keep up with baby girl's growth rate. Speaking of, she gained another two ounces overnight. It didn't sound like a big deal to me, but I have no knowledge of anything in the medical field. Dr. Crowen said it was very significant, given that wolf pups are expected to gain two ounces weekly at this stage. Everything points to me going into labor at the end of the month, which I don't want to think about.But this isn't exactly something I can just block out. Thankfully, my dad offered
There's a knock on the door before it opens, and the same person who took me to my MRI, Justin, I think, comes in with a wheelchair. After my MRI, they brought me to a different room with a bigger bed that looked a lot more annoying to move. Honestly, I could have walked. Now that my supernatural healing kicked in, I feel fine. Starving, but fine. The doctors said I have to eat very slowly to get my digestive system working properly again and that if I ate an entire jar of peanut butter like I wanted to, I would just throw it back up immediately and feel like shit. So, my new best friends were crackers with peanut butter and a side of chicken broth. "Hello again, Alpha, Luna. Dr. Crowen is ready for you in the ultrasound room," he says as he locks the wheelchair. I sit up and swing my legs around to get out of bed. Immediately, Roman and Seth jump up, trying to help me. I roll my eyes. "I told you both, I'm fine!" I say, getting up and sitting in the chair Roman's nervousne