55

Subconsciously, I compared the feeling I felt as Ian spoke to me so intimately with how I felt when Mike held me. I was deeply confused on which was greater. Or, maybe I knew, and didn’t want to accept it.


 I turned my face, and softly pecked Ian on the lips. I had to know if I would be able to feel what I had felt for Mike. I felt nothing at all. It was definitely not the same, but still, I held on to the fact that Ian was my first crush. If all else failed, this much was true.


 “I’m glad you do,” I whispered against his lips.


 Ian pulled me closer to his chest, and slowly kissed me. His kisses were so different from Mike. It was sloppy without it feeling rushed. I tried to meet up with him, and not feel completely at a loss with all the kisses being showered at me right now.


 He softly made me balk-walk to somewhere at the back, without stopping his kisses. I forced myself to enjoy it despite the fact that I wasn’t feeling the high I felt with Mike.


 It was like