Chapter 3 - Nova

I stay in my wolf form throughout the night.  It’s the best way for me to heal.  My wolf’s metabolism is sped up which will help to heal the bruises to the point that I can at least cover them up with makeup tomorrow.  The bones will all shift back into place when I shift back, probably leaving a bit of soreness and ache behind, but nothing that I can’t deal with, even on heels.

            I’m used to pain.  It’s like a second skin that I wear, whether physical or mental, I always feel it.  I can fake like it’s not there and no one will know.

            And at least in wolf form, if Roy comes back I can defend myself better.

            Healing from major wounds like this always causes me to dream.  I don’t know if it’s because of the fact that I’m in my wolf form and closer to the Goddess or if it’s because of all the crazy amount of chemistry that’s going on in my body to heal myself.  Whatever it is, I find myself floating into a dream.

            I find myself walking in a familiar wooden clearing and coming upon a run-down cabin.   But the overgrown grass and general detritus of the forest had been cleared away.  A huge garden is off to one side of the yard.  The moon hangs low in the sky and lights glow in the cabin windows and lights glow in the cabin windows.

            The closer that I get to the cabin, the more it seems to repair itself.  By the time I get to the door, it’s beautifully painted and trimmed with flowers all around the stepping stones leading up the entrance.

            The door opens before I have a chance to touch the doorknob.

            And standing there is the one person that means the entire world to me.

            Cody.

            He looks amazing.  Especially compared to the last time I saw him, at the mercy of the pack guards.  Beaten to a bloody pulp. 

            Now, his golden brown skin is clear and bright.  His nose is straight and the curve of his lips immediately tips up into a smile. 

            “Nova!” he cries out.  His arms come around me and he pulls me into a huge hug, burying his face in my hair like he used to do.

            “Cody?  How…?  When…?”  I can’t even think any words.  Cody was the only thing that kept me going in the rogue encampment.  I thought that I’d lost him forever when the pack guards came three years ago. 

            But he’s here, with his arms wrapped around me.

            I don’t know how long we stand there, just holding each other tightly.  But eventually, Cody pulls back and says, “Come in, come in.”

            I follow him into a beautifully furnished and bright and warm and exactly the way that we dreamed it would to be.  A huge hammock is hanging on the porch.  A cuddle pile of blankets for our wolves to sleep and a long counter for u to experiment with cookie.  The fireplace is burning low and there’s a pile of marshmallows, graham crackers, and chocolate bars on the coffee table in front of it. 

            It’s exactly what I had pictured in my mind.

            My heart is beating hard, my smile so wide that it’s making my face ache.

            Cody’s smiling and laughing.  Well, he is until he sees my face.

            “You still have your rogue mark.”  It’s not a question, but a heartbroken statement.  It’s only then that I realize that the large, dark mark over his left eye marking him as unwanted and undesirable is gone.

            Some pack took him in and accepted him as one of their own, the alpha erasing the mark.  Something that my father hadn’t taken the time to allow me to do.

            And without a sponsor in the pack that was of age to vouch for me, I couldn’t get the mark erased from my skin.  I couldn’t be accepted.

            Using my long blonde hair, I cover that part of my face, ashamed of it in a way I’ve never felt before.  When I’m out among the pack, it’s not embarrassment that makes me cover my mark.  It’s fear of what they’ll do when they see that I’m a rogue.

            Other than that, I’ve had the mark for so long that it doesn’t really bother me.  I actually like that it’s something else that separates me from my father.  I might not be a part of a pack, but that just means that I’m not a part of something that accepts monsters like Roy.

            But with Cody being mark free, I’m separated from him.  And that is shameful.

            Cody’s hand reaches out to my face, turning me to face him.  “Don’t ever hide from me, Star.  We’ve been through too much for you to ever hide from me.”

            I can’t help but smile at Cody’s nickname for me.  When he found out that my name means a star that shows an increased brightness, he became enamored with the meaning.  He said that in the darkness of the rogue camp and how they treated us, he was always looking for the brightest thing around.  And it was me.

            Then he places his hand over my face, right on my mark.  I tingling sensation covers my skin.  The feeling is almost pain, but not quite.

            “What are you doing?” I ask, my voice rising in fear.

            “Accepting you as mine,” Cody tells me.

            I can only stare at him, my mouth opening and closing a few times before I can say, “But only an alpha – “

            “I know,” he says.

            When he pulls his hand away, he turns me to a mirror on the wall beside the door.  It’s then that I see something that I haven’t seen in 12 years without the aid of makeup.  My face has smooth, unblemished skin.

            And the brown eyes that I’ve had since the matemark was placed have been erased as well.  In their place are pale violet irises staring back at me.

            Suddenly, I’m woken from my dream by my alarm clock, still on the floor and in my wolf form.  It’s 2:00 pm and time for me to start getting ready for another double at work.