Nightmare (Before Confession)

              I felt my back collide with a solid wall, pushing all the air out from my lungs. I gritted my teeth as a hand came across my face, a sickening smack sounding off it. Pain burst across my face from the force of the slap I received. Tears welled up in my eyes as I tried to push the pain from my head. Do not show weakness, do not show them you fear them. Stay strong Alliah, you can do this. A wicked laugh came from the Knight in training that had smacked me. It was almost maniacal as it resounded off the walls and falling back to my ears. In this moment I felt truly terrified because I was outnumbered and out muscled.

              “So, this is the Great Crowned Princess Alliah. Look at the way you cower. I can’t believe they let someone like you train to be a Knight. You are so weak it’s pathetic. Your father must be so disappointed to have you as his daughter. Why don’t you just drop out already and go home.” The voice was dark and sinister. It made my skin crawl just listening to him speak. My heart pounded heavily in my ears as I felt two hands wrap around my wrists. I cried out as the nails bit into my flesh and ripped my arms above my head forcefully. A hand wrapped around my throat and I was forced to look into my assailant. Uriah Weldon. He was a year older than me and came from a very wealthy noble family.

              His father had a seat on the Council that over saw all the Kingdoms, so he was regarded almost as high as a King. He was respected immensely just by title, but no one saw how much of an actual prick he could really be. Even if I wanted to complain about Uriah, no one would believe me anyway because I was a woman. It would seem like I was trying to play the system, a woman crying because a lowly man was being mean. Especially if you where to bully a royal, it would be an immediate execution. If I where to get Uriah, son of a Councilman, there would be a huge conflict. So, I took the beatings they would give me every time. If anyone would ask, it would be the same answer for everything. I was a klutz. Of course, being a woman that was an acceptable answer. No one would think that a woman would be anything more than an issue, despite how accomplished or skilled I as. So, here I was, dangling just barely off the ground by my wrists as this stupid Council kid continued to beat me.

              “Now now Alliah, you don’t really want to alert the others about where we are do you?” The Uriah sniggered. His other buddies laughed darkly as well. I said nothing as Uriah balled up his fist and launched it towards my stomach. I couldn’t help but feel the vomit rise in my throat as the impact made me loose my breath. Pain seared through my lower abdomen and I clenched my teeth, trying not to scream out my pain. My eyes continued to tear up as my clenched teeth gritted together. Why did they have to be so mean to me? I wouldn’t show them my pain, I wouldn’t let them win.

              Another blow to my abdomen and I couldn’t help the small gasp of pain that escaped my lips. A shared dark chuckle sounded around me as they all took turned landing blow after blow. My vision started to swim around the edges. I didn’t know how much more I could take. Finally, the blows stopped, but not before the hand around my throat tightened and I couldn’t breathe. Already too tired to fight back, I was barely able to gasp for air.

             

              “It’s really to bad you chose to become a Knight Alliah. You are really so beautiful, I would have made you, my wife. But no one would have a female warrior as their other half. You are a disgrace to your kind no matter what your title is. Like I said, you should just drop out now.” He let go of my throat and I gasped for air. The cold air filling my tight and deprived lungs. I continued to say nothing as they let my wrists go and I painfully fell to the ground. The floor was hard and cold as I sat there wheezing, holding my stomach as I tried to regain my strength.

              “How pathetic. To think that this is going to be our future ruler. I will never bow down to the likes of you.” Uriah spat on me as the other two of his goons laughed. I clenched my teeth together as I continued to listen to their words. They where right. Why would anyone want to bow down to a Royal who couldn’t even defend themselves? I was weak and pathetic. There was no hope for me. Having had their fill of amusement for the night, they left me alone in a small training room. The silence growing thick as their bitter laughter slowly faded away. I coughed and heaved as I pulled my self into a sitting position and slumped against the wall. 

              What hope did I have if I couldn’t stand up to a few bullies? Let alone a few kids who weren’t even at my level. In class I excelled and was the top student. But outside the eye of the teachers, I was the weakest link. I pulled my knees weakly to my chest and cried. The pain was unbearable, and all I could do was pity myself.

              The door to the training room opened and I froze. They weren’t loud and obnoxious this time around. They never came back for seconds anyway, so why would they come back in here? I tensed as the footsteps came closer, quietly and cautiously until the stopped right in front of me. I feared that if I looked up, I would be face to face with Uriah’s smug grin and he would beat on me once again. I don’t think I could handle a second bout of pain.

              “Alliah, what are you doing in here so late at night? You didn’t show up for dinner, so I came looking for you.” Nicklos. I didn’t even care that he was a Prince. I didn’t care that I was a Princess. I launched myself at him and clutched at his chest, sobbing like a child. I was in so much relief that it wasn’t Uriah and his goons that it didn’t matter if he looked down upon me. I just didn’t want to face Uriah again. I felt him pause at first, completely thrown off by my sudden and abrupt behavior. I thought he would push me to the ground and yell at me as well.

              So, it came to a surprise when he tried to wrap his arms around me. But I flinched away from his touch, letting go of him and falling back to the ground. The pain they inflicted on my body was too much. I also didn’t want him to see what they had done. I didn’t want him to see how weak I was outside of the classroom. I tried hiding my face in my hands, shielding the bruises I knew that covered my face. Maybe he would just leave me alone and I could carefully crawl my way back to the barracks. If no one saw me, they couldn’t ask me questions.

              Hands wrapped carefully around my wrists and tried to pry my hands away from my face. I struggled at first, not wanting him to see me, but I was to weak to fight back for very long. So as soon as my hands fell away, I tried to look away from him. But he caught my face gently with the palm of his hand and forced me too look up at him. His golden eyes where filled to the brim with anger. His eyes wandered all over my face, and then narrowed when they fell upon my throat. I could see the adam’s apple in his throat move as he grew angrier.

              “Who did this to you Alliah?” He asked whispering. There was a dangerous edge to his tone, and I felt myself shudder underneath him. I couldn’t bring myself to speak because of how much my throat hurt. Not that I would tell him anyway. This was between me and Uriah. I didn’t want him getting involved, because having a man stick up for me would make me look even more weak. All I could do was just stare up at his angry face, his hair falling slowly off the top of his head. My silence only angered him further, his teeth clenching together as he watched me.

              “If you won’t tell me, then I won’t leave your side ever again. I will be with you always so they can’t hurt you. Do you understand Alliah. I don’t want to ever see you in this much pain ever again.” He placed his forehead against mine. I felt the tears roll of his cheeks and into the palms of my hands as he silently wept. Where those tears really for me? Was he that concerned that he would show vulnerability in front of me? I felt touched that he cared that much for me.

              “U-Uriah.” I tried to croak out. But it came out chocked and strained. I let my eyes close, angry at my own weakness. I should have said nothing to him. I shouldn’t have even tried. This was not his battle. “D-don’t do an-nything s-stupid Nicklos. T-this is n-not your f-fight.” I said straining once again. Nicklos pulled his head back from mine, his eyes narrowing as I fought to speak.

              “Stop, not another word. You are going back to your room and you are going to rest. Come on.” He said standing on his feet. He offered his hand out, and I took it weakly. He pulled me towards him and helped steady myself. But my legs trembled and wobbled as pain seared through me. I groaned loudly and leaned against him, wincing at the impact. I couldn’t stop from clutching my stomach as the bile once again rose to my throat. I panted heavily, hoping that I could keep it down and not embarrass myself further.

              “Those damn cowards. How dare they beat on their future Queen.” He spoke as he carefully and slowly walked me out of the room. Each step made my world more and more fuzzy. I couldn’t think or breath right as the darkness slowly clouded my vision. They really went all out this time. I don’t think they wanted me to leave the training room. At least not till morning. All I know was that the next time I saw them, I was going to make sure that they felt the same pain I was feeling right now. I wouldn’t let them get away with this next time. I was just thankful that this time Nicklos managed to find me, and like always, he was there for me. I really don’t think I deserved someone like him in my life, but I was thankful, nonetheless.

              “Maybe he is right, I really should just give up. I can’t even fend myself against three people. This wouldn’t happen if I weren’t stronger.” I grunted as he helped me down the hallways. A low, and annoyed sigh came from Nicklos. I could feel his fingers flex around my hip as I hobbled along side him.

              “Nonsense. Stop talking like you are ready to give up. That’s not the Alliah I know. The Alliah I know would squish this under her foot and keep moving forward. That’s what I like about you is your drive to keep going. You love when others get angry because that means you are doing good, you are accomplishing exactly what you want to.” He said that’s what he liked about me. I felt the smile spread across my lips at the warmth of his words. He was right about one thing though; I really did like to anger others. I only wanted to prove that I could just be good as other men.

              “You said you like me. Was that a confession?” I teased. Nicklos chuckled. It was soft and warm, and it made my smile that much bigger. I stumbled and tripped, but thankfully with his hand around my hips I was saved from falling forward. But that didn’t stop my world from spinning, I could feel the bile just at the edge of my throat and I coughed uncontrollably. Nicklos wordlessly placed me against the wall, and I leaned against it. Still pressed against the wall, Nicklos wrapped his arms around me.

              “Alliah, I will do what ever it takes to not see you this way again, I don’t care if that means we sneak out at night and spar until you are more comfortable with defending yourself. Your situation is unique, and I won’t always be by your side to defend you. But just know that no matter what happens, I will always have your back.” I hesitated against his hug at first, not because he made me feel uncomfortable, but because I really was in a lot of pain. But despite my body’s protests, I reached up and loosely hugged him back. I had never really doubted him for a moment that he would harm me in any way. He was the most reliable human here.

              “Nicklos, you dummy. Do you think that I question you and hate you in any way? This wasn’t your fault just like the last few times wasn’t either. Although I do think that the extra help will benefit me since I don’t grow up knowing how to fight to begin with. I am book smart, and I know that I will find an edge on him eventually, so just keep your head low. I want to be the one to settle this score.” Nicklos sighed again, but not with annoyance this time, more like he was accepting my request for him to stay out of this. I wasn’t going to prove anything if I couldn’t fend for myself.

              I woke up sputtering, my chest heaving. What a horrible nightmare. It felt so realistic that I felt like a teenager once again. If it hadn’t been for Nicklos, I really don’t think that I would be out here now with these men and trying to find a solution to our bandit problems. I know I was mad at him, but I really should stop treating him so coldly.