Chapter 44 Hospital

(Lydia)

Mama was still awake when I entered the hotel. She dragged a long puff of a cigarette and then tipped it against an ashtray, which was full already. An empty pack sat on the table next to it. She had already opened a second one. How come she didn’t get lung cancer?

She looked briefly at me and then turned her gaze away, staring off into the distance.

The silence stretched between us. I could not help but stare.

I knew that what I had done was hurtful, but had she not pushed her boundaries? And was she not, at this very minute, acting like the same cold and distant person that she had been to me all her life?

What would it take for her to, just once, treat me like a daughter? To display some warmth and affection the way she had when I was a very small child?

It dawned upon that perhaps that person had frozen still deep inside of her. Maybe, it was my charge to bring her back to the surface.

“I’ve booked an appointment for you, Mama,” I said, “with the best oncologist in the sta