Chapter 86I grab fistfuls of the twelve thousand dollars Louis Vuitton dress Ash bought for this day and drag. The sound of it tearing makes me shiver with satisfaction as it rips from top to bottom. It's a slip of a thing, not even worth the amount it was paid for. I look down in disdain as it pools at my feet.Unfortunately, my satisfaction is short-lived.My chest is still on fire with shock, that damn tightness sat constricting my lungs to the point I almost can't breathe and have to drag short gulps of air in through my mouth.How will you feel if your fiancée didn't show up on the day of your engagement party?Yup! That's exactly what happened to me.Twelve hours earlierThe day dawns bright and clear. It's so bright, shards of sunlight peek into the room through the floor-to-ceiling length curtains, piercing my eyes in its brightness. I roll to the other side, noting the warmth and dent on it. Ash must
Chapter 87It's said that as time goes by, the pain of a broken heart reduces.Well. . . that's a bloody lie if I ever heard any. This pain sitting pretty like a gigantic log of wood on my chest never goes, never really leaves. Oh, it fades alright, it fades when I'm working and keeping busy, but then when I'm alone, it slams back into me with a bang. Worse still when I look into her face, it's like staring at another treacherous face."She's sooo cute. Look at those chubby cheeks and those dimples, oh my. She's going to break many hearts when she grows up, I guarantee it."I stare at Clarissa's mum and sigh, because what can I say? It's the truth. Lily is a beautiful child that brings me so much joy with her delightful chuckles and joyful personality, but staring at her every day gives me a pleasure-pain kind of feeling.I look at her dark hair which is in the exact shade as mine, quite alright, but when I st
Chapter 88After calling Dan and telling him I would be available for dinner at 7 pm, I slump into my chair, emotionally exhausted even though the day has barely begun. I try to dive into work, I really do try but it looks like the white roses, which seem to mock me from their perch on my table, are a constant clear reminder of my recent past.When I realize I can't take it anymore, I fling the vase at the door and watch as the flowers scatter onto the floor and the vase makes an ear-shattering noise as it splinters into many pieces. Luckily, it's lunch break and no one is around so I'm in the clear for the meantime to vent. It seems my chest has been torn open and there's this great chasm that needs to be filled.I shake my head and grip my hair in my two hands, despair filling me with anguish. My soul which had been full to the brim a year ago, screams with emptiness. I feel like a walking dead because I'm so
Chapter 89I met Dan on one of those nights when I wandered the streets of Clarissa's parent's neighborhood. I had just been discharged from the hospital with my daughter and could not stand to be near her at that time because she reminded me so much of her father.If I'm to be honest, she still does but I have come to terms with my fate and realize that anytime I look at her, she isn't just a part of him but of me as well, and can not be blamed for her father's behavior. I would wander the streets aimlessly until I walked into a park. I remember sitting on a seat and staring aimlessly at the children who played on the swings.I always got glared at by their mothers but I was too out of it to even realize at that time. A man walked up to me and politely asked if he could sit beside me. I'd said nothing at that time because I just wanted to be left alone. That man was Dan. He sat down anyway and introduced himse
Chapter 90The feeling of being in Dan's arms is bringing back dêjãvū and that puts a bad taste in my mouth. After eating - rather, forcing him to eat, he swept me into his arms and onto the dance floor and I had to painfully go through the memories of another time with Ash.I can't do it anymore."I'm tired, Dan." I grimace as his hand tightens around my waist but I release a sigh of relief when it loosens and he steps back with a jerky nod."You're right, I'm sorry. I'll take you home now.""No!" My voice comes out loud, so I paste a smile on my face hoping it looks comfortable, and shake my head. "No, please." I shrug. "The night is still young, and. . .""What are you saying?" I watch with a sinking heart as hope flares to life in his eyes. I'm not tired of being with Dan, but he shouldn't look like I'm the next best thing after God.What have I gotten myself into? Unfortunately for me, I can't stop now. "I
Chapter 91All around me, the theatre takes on thunderous applause from the people who are standing, clapping, and cheering. Within me, there's a different type of thunder, and even though the applause is enough to drown out the roar of a lion, I can still hear my heartbeat pounding in my ears.Dan is oblivious to the turmoil I'm going through as he's also a part of the crowd clapping and standing. The strobe lights are no longer bouncing all around as their focus is now solely on the stage and the men smiling and bowing.Yes, they did a great job, but my attention is now focused on the seat where the couple is, where I know Ash Thunder is. I fiddle with my bag to bring out my phone but my hands are shaking so badly it's difficult to get it out. On the third try, I succeed as I drag my phone out and manage to put the torchlight on as well.I flash it on the seat directly in front of me but it's empty. There's
Chapter 92He's slouched with his hands resting on the arms of the chair, his legs stretched out in front of him. Dressed in a crisp white shirt, pressed black trousers, and polished black brogues, his hair is slightly wet and slicked back. He looks like a poster boy for the CEO of a conglomerate and even though I hate him, it's a look he carries quite well.I've never seen him wearing such clothes before. It's like I'm looking at his clone and not the real person. He's like a totally different person.The air is weighty with something heavy and I sit up immediately when I realize he's here. Ash is here. He's sitting in front of me, and staring at me. In my mind's eye, I see him sitting close to the blonde woman and staring at her. I close my eyes, trying to unsee it. I feel as if many hands are closing around my throat as I begin to gasp for air. He's beside me in an instant holding a glass of water."Breat
Chapter 93The night seems to drag on and sleep seems to be elusive, a figment of my imagination, something that has refused to come even though I've willed it. Believe me when I say that I've done almost everything to try and get my brain to relax but it seems to be an exercise in futility.I've tossed and turned, trying to shut off my brain activities by counting sheep, I've even tried praying, but that has never really worked out for me so I just gave up and resorted to tossing and turning.Look at me now - it's almost dawn and I'm still awake. Wide awake, actually.I can't seem to get those pictures Ash threw on the bed for me to see, out of my head. Even though I locked them up in my bedside drawer, they're still imprinted in my mind.Why would anyone want to kill me?What have I done for that to happen?I haven't hurt anyone.Alright, yes, I did kill someone. Two people actually, but the first person I kill