Share

A new start?

Author: Luna Sads
last update Last Updated: 2022-04-23 13:10:20

Lies were always meant to give rise to pain and anguish with every ounce of self-detested that one could feel. I suddenly felt the same. And probably this was the reason why I despised Alphas this much. The power, the command, the intimidation they held, I was too naive to grip. My past had been a crucial subject of conversation for me, not that I was scared to open up, but I was frightened of the aftermath that truth would bring. The pain, the sufferings, the hatred.

What was I supposed to tell? That these were what my moon blessed gave me? That his fingers had inflicted these marks of ownership, his claim over me?

"I told you, I fell." This time, my voice was calm and the tone was more stable. He didn't seem to grip the lie I fed him instead he gritted his teeth, I could see the muscle of his jaw twitching and with a vague shake of his head, he retreated his hands. The sudden lack of warmness in his body brought a cold gush of wind to settle over me.

His fingers lingered for a moment over the bruises before he locked his eyes with mine.

"Alpha, the arrangements are made. We're good to-"

This man surely had very good timing indeed. Augustus groaned with irritation and I looked over his shoulder before I was met with the dark eyes of a man from yesterday. Avi, I suppose. Today he was dressed more maturely and sophisticated. The black button-down enhanced his caramel skin whilst the lighter-washed jeans cladded to his muscular thighs. This male looked nothing like the man I had seen yesterday.

With one glance at us, he stopped. His brows narrowed in confusion at our intimacy as he tilted his head to the side not understanding why his alpha had cornered an unknown woman to the wall. My eyes lowered to the floor, suddenly feeling more self-conscious. The bruises over my flesh were now for every other to see, they would know my past, and that would lead to the ultimatum of imagining things and false assumptions. I hated it. I hated this feeling of self-loathe. I was no good, no saint, ruined for any other male and my soul. How sicken was it to know that my moon blessed was the reason my soul was bleeding, the engravings his actions and words perished upon me, how would I ever forget that? Was there any escape for me, or I was too delusional to even ponder that?

"I'll bring her medicines." James interrupted breaking the awkward and tauten aura surrounding us. My breath hitched as Augustus gave me a hard glance before he turned around. He needed answers and he would get them no matter what. I gulped. And before that, I would be gone.

Augustus was reluctant to follow James before he glanced at me once more.

Avi looked more confused than ever as his eyes landed on the same place where my bruises stood. I uncomfortably shifted on my left foot as my hair fell over my face, shielding my embarrassment. Wolves of Xerxes's pack never cared if I had bruises or cuts over my body. I was barely treated like his mate back there. The shame, the humiliation, Xerxes had made me go through was intense, wild, and dark. From owning my flesh to conquering my soul, he had destroyed every bit of me. I suddenly didn't recognize the male he had turned into.

"I-" Avi cleared his throat for he had sensed my resistance and looked away. "The preparation of your arrival has been arranged." He tried to break the awkwardness between us and all I could do was merely nod.

****

The ride to the packhouse was tensed and filled with uncomfortable silence. I did my best to not look his way whilst I could sense his intense gaze now and then over the nape of my neck. It was kind of relieving in a way that someone cared about my bruises but also I was intimidated by the way he would usually glance my way. I was not used to kindness.

After Augustus talked with James about my medications, he helped me to settle in a black truck. Avi had some work, so he had to stay with James, and now all I left was this alpha to deal with.

Fidgeting my fingers over my lap, I looked outside. I had to admit it. The surrounding view of the pack borders was soothing. The tall green canopies, the sunlight making polka dot effect on forest grounds. The wild calm breeze and soft aftermath it brought.

It suddenly reminded me of my home.

And also a pang of pain in my chest.

I shrugged away the thoughts. What's gone was gone. After fifteen minutes, we pulled in front of the three-story modern house. The majority of it looked to be made of fine wood and glass. It reflected the color of sunset, making it look as though it was made of fire.

Nervousness filled me as I witnessed several unknown wolves standing in front of the front door. The engine was turned off and my panic grew. I never felt welcomed among wolves. I heard Augustus's door slam shut before I felt the one on my side clicking. My breath hitched when I looked his way. The warm sunlight fell upon his face, the chiseled jaw of his twitched, his sharp jawline looked more prominent and his orbs glistened brightly.

"Come," he extended his hand and I suddenly felt more anxious. I did not want to go outside. It felt like I was going to go into full panic. Xerxes had made me loathe every single wolf even though I was one myself.

"You don't have to worry, no one's going to hurt you." Augustus sensed my discomfort for he assured me with his soft words. Maybe. Maybe, it wasn't as hard as I portrayed it to be. Moreover, it was not like I was going to live here for eternity. I needed a cover, and it was perfect.

Shaking, I placed my hand over his. The sudden contact made my skin tingle and I snapped my eyes towards him for he felt the same as his eyes sparkled.

"Come, cupcake."

My feet stumbled as I stepped outside the truck. The harsh sun did nothing to calm me yet I felt strange feelings leveling through me. The atmosphere around here was more lively, less conservative. My hands were sweating profusely between his palm. Now that he was so close to me, I could barely keep up with his long strides and tall posture. He was a man in his prime.

Ignoring the blaring sensations, I looked ahead. My eyes first landed on a beautiful woman standing a few feet away from us. She wore a tight pair of dark-washed jeans and a white crop, off-shoulder top. The shining long blondes of hers were draped down her back in waves of sunshine and more. And when my eyes landed on her porcelain face, I was taken off guard by the charming smile on her red-painted lips.

"Alpha Augustus, good to see you here!" She beamed with excitement as she clasped her hands together and bowed slightly, giving her respect to her Alpha.

"How are you doing, Mikaela? Where's Kral? I wonder what that little devil is up to this time." Mikaela's face brightened up at the said name and she threw her head back chuckling.

"He's probably sulking around. That little devil of mine wanted to visit his Dad. James was suddenly called when he was playing with Kral and you know how demanding Kral becomes." James? Was she talking about the same James I think or some other? Augustus laughed and I watched in awe as his lips curled upward and he wholeheartedly chuckled.

I wished to laugh the same way.

"He'll probably hate me thinking his father is occupied because of me. But if it isn't for an emergency, I would have never called him immediately." Augustus's tone suddenly dropped to a hard one. His palm tightened around my hand and I held back the urge to flinch.

"It's alright, it's his duty as a doctor to serve his pack. This is the least we could do after what you've done for us."

Augustus's eyes softened.

"Anyways, this is Katarina. Katarina, this is Mikaela, James' mate, and his wife." His hand left mine before it found a way to my lower back to push me in front of him. My eyes widened.

"Y-you're beautiful." The words stuttered out of my mouth before I could think. Damn! Why did I have to embarrass myself like this? Now she would probably think I was some kind of freak. I clenched my eyes shut, suddenly wanting the lands to open and swallow me wholly. My eyes lowered to the ground, waiting for her to snicker at me and probably embarrass me further.

Instead, I heard two distinct laughs. W-were are they laughing at me?

"She's a shy one. You were right." Mikaela muttered in between her laughs for her blue orbs softened at my sight.

"I know, right. That's why I trust you with her."

"You don't have to worry, Alpha."

****

"And this is the library. If you need anything and I mean anything, just seek me. You don't have to feel uncomfortable around me or any other wolf. You're welcomed here and don't hesitate to use the kitchen to your liking."

"T-Thank you."

She smiled.

"No worries, sweetheart. You can rest now since your injuries are still healing. Feel free to take a bath, I've arranged a few sets of clothes for you in a drawer and other necessities."

After Augustus received a call from Avi, he left me with Mikaela. Not that I minded, I was starting to like her personally. She was a fun-loving and cheerful woman. Everything I was not. I was introduced to a few rules of the pack and she happily gave me a tour of the house. The packhouse was quite large from the inside. With a touch of modernity and subtle ancient crafts.

I was given a room on the second floor. Closer to stairs and between Mikaela's and James, and Avi's room. I was also informed that Augustus didn't live her though he had the entire third floor to himself, he preferred to keep his privacy in his place.

She said she'll show me his house next week after I heal fully.

Probably, I wasn't going to be here for that long.

I was yet to introduce myself to other wolves but Mikaela suggested I should rest first. And since there was a feast tonight, I would be introduced at that time.

I just wish for that feast to end soon as I was a complete introvert. People scare me more than ghosts. A yawn escaped my lips. But first, I need to sleep.

Related chapters

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Hard to breathe

    "This dress seems kind of short." "Nonsense! It's just the perfect fit." I sighed. I realized I've done it a lot recently. My eyes keenly assessed my figure in the full-length mirror. Though the emerald fabric looked enticing on my caramel skin, it also highlighted my curves and bring out the brown of my orbs, but it still was a little conservative from the bottom. The rim barely crossed my knees. Moreover, I was glad that the neckline was more sophisticated and provided false coverage for my scars. Mikaela still hadn't witnessed them, but I was afraid of what she might think of me when she does so? "Okay then." I voiced my decision. Soothing the wrinkles out with my palms, I grabbed the flats before wearing them. "This dress used to be my favorite when I was your age." "My age? How old are you?" Confusion laced my doubts. A low chuckle filled the empty walls of the room as she twirled in front of the mirror. Her eyes set over her reflection as she assessed herself."I'm thirty-

    Last Updated : 2022-04-29
  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   A sinner

    The rest of the dinner went rather smoothly. I was introduced to some of the wolves whilst before Mikaela could make me acquainted with the rest, James had excused her. I sighed at the sight before me. Their pup had caused some trouble for them and by the looks, James looked quite displeased with his male. I felt pity for the little wolf for his eyes were squinted down with his hands crossed in front as his head hung low. It was infuriating how I couldn't hear them despite being a wolf. It felt like, the longer my wolf was in hibernation, the more senses I was losing. Kral sniffed back his tears as James stood with hands over his waist as he scolded the poor soul while Mikaela stood beside her mate with glistening eyes. What had this poor male done to deserve his father's wrath? "Kral can sometimes get hard to handle." I jumped startled to look over my shoulder. Augustus stood just behind me, his face close to the side of his face as he looked at the scene in front. His body merel

    Last Updated : 2022-05-08
  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Rasmus

    It was suffocating. Even when I tried to breathe normally, I couldn't help this lingering feeling of devastation inside me. To elucidate my sentiments at this point seemed to be difficult for me. It was supposed to be this way. I should've known the consequences. However, I was younger than Augustus, I was supposed to be the mature and wise one judging I was the female. It was shameless of me to even think about a mated male. One with a child.I again tried to take a deep breath as I watched the duo conversing silently with their eyes and emotions. Augustus had an ingenious look mauled over his features. Whereas, the younger male looked to and fro between his father and me now and then. It was so intriguing how much identical he looked to his father. Unrealistic in a way that I had barely seen any child looked as bewildered as this young male. The only difference I could point out was the innocence in his sparkling eyes unlike his father, the small pout of confusion on his soft pink l

    Last Updated : 2022-05-24
  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   All the stars we stood under

    Losing someone dear to your heart always brought enormous pain and life-long drive, a sole remembrance of devastation, plastered with hundreds of sleepless nights and restless days. I've been through it, not only when I lose my parents but also when I watched my brother dying and the worse, my moon blessed killed him. I could feel his pain surprisingly. The look he had on his face was once on mine, tears that were souvenirs of our sufferings. I wanted to reassure him, to hold his fragile body in my arms, and alleviate him that everything was going to be fine, but I knew none of this mattered, knowing neither his mother was ever going to come back nor my brother. They were gone, for different reasons, in different ways.Still, I placed my hand on his back, and before I knew it, I was rubbing his back soothingly. Despite my consolations, I felt his body tensing and he hung his head low when I noticed his fingers interlaced with each other with tear drops falling over his lap.My heart

    Last Updated : 2022-06-14
  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Lies and truth.

    The stars shined brighter than ever, the frigid touch of wind that once was meant to calm my soul, now made me warmer than ever and the moon, how could I not admire it, for once, I thanked the moon goddess to letting a person like Augustus come in my life. It was not a purposeful meeting of ours, but something that moon must have prepared for me, to mend the mistake of making a cruel and heartless creature like Xerxes to be my mate.And then there was this feeling, something so blissful and in-between serenity, and peace, that now finally my life was becoming a little better. The thought that I was going to flee from here too was somewhat becoming a blur, the feeling I was coming to suddenly like.Augustus stroked his thumb over the back of my hand, delicate enough to let me feel his sentiments and tight enough to not let me pull my hand away, not that I was going to but I liked this. Not to forget the smile that was still there on my lips, something so strange to me.I could barely r

    Last Updated : 2022-06-17
  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   A glimpse to past

    "Pancakes or toast?"My sleepless eyes moved toward her and I mumbled with a small smile."Anything would be fine."She nodded and turned her back towards me as she mixed the batter of pancakes. I was never a picky eater. Though there were times when I threw some tantrums here and there for not eating the time I had to spend caged in Xerxes's pack, I came to realise the worth of the food. Of course, I would if it meant eating once in three days, not full but only two slices of bread with a glass of water.Xerxes was a cruel male, his antics, his ways, his words, everything about him was horrendous. Sometimes, I wonder if he ever felt any remorse or guilt for anything he did to me. It was torturous for me, but never he batted a lash on my condition. Instead of pain, my bloodied body caused him immense pleasure, my sufferings caused him joy. What deeds I had done to get him as my moon blessed, only God could know that."Katty!"I wanted to laugh, ironic how my brother used to call me th

    Last Updated : 2022-07-05
  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Poison

    Dread and shame washed over me and I couldn’t help but look towards the door now and then. My eyes flickered to and fro between the man sitting at his desk, as he frowned once in a while looking at my reports and leaving a deep sigh, and the door as I anticipated Augustus’s visit.James had already informed me that Augustus would be here anytime and I didn’t want to face him, not after knowing he knew half of my past. I took a deep breath to calm myself as I fidgeted with my fingers.“I can smell your anxiousness, you know, right?” I jumped as James closed the file with my reports and adjusted his glasses. I shook my head.“I’m not anxious, it’s just…I don’t know how to face him,” I mumbled rather quietly. I heard him sigh as he leaned back and crossed his arms across his chest.“Well, I would’ve given you some advice but looks like time beats me to it.” I frowned at his words and actions as he pushed the chair back and stood up to walk towards the door.“Where are you go-“ Words h

    Last Updated : 2022-07-19
  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Elena Lancaster

    “Aconite is more poisonous for hibernated wolves than a normal one. I need to get more of her blood sample for further clarifications.”“About the cure? Isn’t there anything of that sort?” My voice shattered at the end. When I finally got my freedom, my life was giving up on me. James hummed, flipping through pages of the book. His eyes glued on particular words, assessing, he mouthed the words silently as he nodded understanding the meaning before looking to my left.“Aconite is a poison. There is no specific antidote for Aconite poisoning. In primitive medical sciences, dehydrated borax is mentioned for the management of aconite poisoning. I have some stored in the hospital, but it is not a permanent solution.” James explained and my fists clenched and my head lowered. Augustus tensed beside me. “There have to be something, some plant, herb, anything at all. Every poison has its cure.” Augustus tried to reason. A sigh of defeat left my throat. Of course, I was born pathetic, and I

    Last Updated : 2022-07-21

Latest chapter

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   New beginning

    “Xerina! Stop right there! It’s dangerous!” Luca’s shouts filled the air as he chased after me. His voice was irritated and concerned as I laughed and ran through the forest. Jumping over the lodges of wood and hay, I was covered in mud and dirt. Everyone in the pack loved how energetic and relaxed I was even though I was going to get a better earful of scolds from my father later. But now he had gotten quite used to my tactics. “Hurry up, Luca!” I screeched dashing down the muddy road that led to the cave just between the forest. I stopped when my breathing become haggard and I could no longer hear Luca behind me. Where was he? Did I lose him? A grin managed to creep on my face at the thought. Now I would be able to enjoy myself-“Ah!” A scream left my mouth when Luca suddenly jumped in front of me. Faking a startled gasp I narrowed my eyes at him. “You scared me.”“It’s enough, let’s go back.” He panted as he grabbed my wrist and I jerked my hand back. Placing both of my hands on my

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Wedding night 2

    In that captivating moment, as he lifted one of his legs gracefully in the air, a surge of anticipation pulsed through me. It was as if time had momentarily stood still, allowing us to surrender to the intensity of our connection. His fervent kiss upon my ankle ignited a fiery passion that resonated with the same depth as his kisses upon my lips.With each deliberate movement, he embarked on a seductive journey along the contours of my leg, his tongue tracing a tantalizing path. A tender pause at my knee ensued, where his lips delicately danced, leaving an imprint of affection that sent shivers of pleasure cascading through my entire being. The sheer intimacy of his touch captured my senses, causing me to succumb to an all-encompassing desire that left me vulnerable and yearning.As he descended upon my thigh, his tongue became an instrument of pure ecstasy. Each stroke, each exploration, evoked a blissful surrender within. I, consumed by an indescribable hunger, felt my very essence m

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   wedding night

    There weren’t too many people, but I was so nervous all of sudden. I was mucous since morning, even Aurora had scolded me once in between that I was being paranoid for no reason. Well, damn her. It was not like I was getting married everyday. We had completed our rituals for the ceremony, and now I wa awaiting for my mate to come and take me to our shared chambers to consummate the marriage. I was fidgeting with my fingers when I looked myself in the mirror. Wearing a white wedding dress that reached my ankles and a deep cut over the neck that was decorated with lace. The door opened and I gasped as Xerxes stepped inside wearing his black tuxedo. I blushed. He looked so handsome and beautiful that it was almost unrealistic. I averted my gaze from his with embarrassment as he smirked and stepped forward. “You ready?” He asked in his masculine voice and I shyly nodded. Leaning down to my face, he brushed his lips against my cheek. “I can not wait anymore.” I could senses his arousal. P

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Epilogue

    “Papa! Papa!” I peered through the kitchen door at my three-year-old running through the lobby and rushing to her father. An unpleased frown on her face as she immediately looked at her father with a pout on her lips. “Luca scolded me.”Faking a frown, my husband scooped the little bundle of joy in his arms and cradled her in his lap. “Why?” He asked wiping the remnants of chocolate on the corner of her lips. Xerina was fond of sweets and probably Luca found her chocolate hiding spot, that’s why he scolded her. Xerina’s eyes visibly narrowed while she glared at her father. “He stole my choci-chose.” She complained and I chuckled knowing I was right. Xerxes’s laugh filled the air and my chest squeezed–as it did every time I saw him with our family. Joy. Unrestrained joy and happiness. I would never tire of seeing him like this. “He did? Where did you get those from?” Xerxes asked shifting her and caressing her stuffed cheeks. She immediately looked away. “I-I…from mama.” My eyes wi

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Remember

    Her life these past years or more had been akin to sprinting through fog. When she often feel to the core of her soul that life was sacred, when she conclude that the natural world was woven into her heart–illusions and diabolical, that their love was all part of this great tapestry of creation, then she would finally be home. Then her Mother Moon would feel that she had returned. Finally in her arms. She loves her children equally. “We haven’t seen Alpha, there’s no sign of either of them,” one of the wolves said through the door. “But wolves are searching for them, the borders are seized.” Marcus bobbed his head and then his eyes moved to the bed. Aurora had gained consciousness a few hours back and on James’s instructions, she had been resting since then. Daniella was traumatised and he suggested she go back, but the little girl was too stubborn, she insisted on being here with her injured brother and Katarina. Katraina. Marcus was worried for her. She had lost so much blood and

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Love is death

    “Hold them down!” Marcus growled as he ducked through the hoard of rouges coming his way. He snarled with anger as several of them tried to hold him down. The battlegrounds were bloodied, but it didn’t stop him from shedding more as he tore them limb by limb. Some were in their wolf forms while others were inhuman, Marcus shifted into his wolf form and roared like a wild beast before running through the pile and making his way to the house where he last left Aurora. Aurora. Her name should bring him anger, malice and betrayal, but right now he couldn’t think that way. He should be angry at her that sleeping with another man before him, she gave birth to a pup who didn’t carry his blood, and she spiked their mate bond. But strangely, right now all he cared was about her. Nothing mattered. Nothing. He realised he had been hating her for nothing. He loved her, even knowing she had betrayed him. Their relationship was not that was built upon trust and love, but he could change that. He

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   He was here

    “I didn’t want to do this, cupcake. I was getting fond of you.” His hands held onto the thick strand of my story hair and he sniffed it making me cry h my nose in disgust. “But power is power. This is the moment I always dreamed of–to be in charge of power.” I swam for the light and he did everything he could to take me into the abyss. He betrayed me, not the other way around.“Why did you lied to me?” I seethed. His eyes looked mockingly at me. It was fear that brought rage, that hot burning anger that seeked to harm. It was a biological button better left alone. When we see something that frightened us, a primitive part of the brain was activated to produce aggression. So, I, when I see all the things around me that make me scared... I was being deliberately triggered... as were my emotions. That rage destroyed me from the inside.“I never did. I really loved you.” He whispered. “You fucking psycho!” Rage filled my voice and I thrashed. Betrayal was a conscious choice for cold indi

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   Hatred

    “A-Augustus…” I breathed out stumbling a step back. His blue eyes narrowed as he assessed me with his gaze. Concern was an act of deep and real caring and as such was a marker of our intertwined souls. I sighed in contempt. If he wasn’t here- I didn’t want to think what would have happened to us. “I don’t have time, Katraina. You have to come with me.” He quickly looked around and motioned me to follow him. I gazed at Aurora as she groaned in pain. Leon crying as Daniella looked terrifyingly between us. She was but a child, this must have shocked her to the core. My first reaction should be taking care of my females than fleeing. I shook my head. “I-I can not leave them behind.” Augustus narrowed his eyes. I could see the worry in his eyes, but they seemed somewhat strange. What Madrei told me earlier flooded through my head and I pondered over it once again. It must be Andrei. Did Augustus know? He probably did cause then he wouldn’t be here. But still, something didn’t feel right.

  • ALPHA OF ALPHA'S (XERXES)   You in danger

    “Katarina…” his voice was as sharp as I last remembered, profound. I just couldn’t believe my eyes. Never before had I noticed how time was so much like water; that it could pass slowly, a drop at a time, even freeze, or rush by in a blink. The clock said it was measured and constant, tick tock, part of an orderly world; the clock lied. “What are you doing here?” My brain stuttered for a moment and my eyes took in more light than I expected, every part of me went on pause while my thoughts caught up. After a wash of reality, I stepped forward, feeling a new danger in my living room. “I need to talk to you, it’s urgent.” He stepped forward, his fists clenched on his sides and a frown resting between his brows. He looked tensed for some reason. I couldn’t believe a man as terrific as him would step foot in here only to talk to his enemy’s mate. I didn’t know much, but Xerxes had filled me with how much dangerous Andrei could be. The man seemed like he breathed in danger and lived on o

DMCA.com Protection Status