I follow Faith to the front door calling her name as loud as I can but it dies the moment it leaves my mouth, only to drown in the loud chatter and music that seems to be pouring into every orifice of the house. I curse under my breath trying to decide what to do. Do I follow her and tell her exactly what's on my mind? Or do I apologize for taking it too far? Shit. I don't know how to do this stuff. I shouldn’t have to apologize, I didn't do anything I didn't want to do and it didn't seem like she was all that averse to it either.
This is all because of Angela. Damn it. If I had just dumped her yesterday like I planned then she wouldn't have had a right to interject. Then Faith would have stayed in my arms and not worried about the fact that I have a girlfriend. Not that Angela was a real girlfriend. I mean really she just wanted the perks of being my girlfriend and I could do whatever I wanted with
“Hey,” I say like a moron swinging my arms as I walk up to her awkwardly. Faith sighs heavily. “Cameron.” she says emotionless by way of a greeting and the deadness of her tone strikes me hard as my chest begins to ache from her lack of emotion. “Listen. I’m sorry.” I say, rubbing the back of my head and dropping my gaze to the grass she is strangling. At Least she is showing something. Even if it is anger. “It’s fine. I was drunk when I kissed you. I had a momentary lapse in judgement.” she says not looking at me. Again with the lack of emotions. This girl is going to kill me. “Faith, look-” “Cameron. You have a girlfriend and you screw everything that walks with boobs. I’m just some game to you.” She says matter of fac
*Faith POV* The stream of sunlight glares in my eyes as the wind blows through my partially propped open window. I groan reaching for my phone to check the time only to realize I had shut it off last night. I roll to my back and take a deep breath as I click the power button and wait for it to come back to life. Within a moment my phone vibrates twice. 2 missed alerts from Izzy. nothing from Cameron. I scoff at myself and my wicked train of thought. Why would I ever imagine that Cameron would reach out? And why do I even care? I can't help but tsk in disappointment at the message. Izzy thinks he took it too far. That's what he thinks I'm upset about? Men are so dense, they just assume we are not perceptive at all. I can still clearly see the way he shuffled and tried to hide from Angela when she came in like he was so embarrassed to see me. A little tear stea
The doorbell rings and I call down to Mia telling her the cash for pizza is on the entryway table. I can hear voices downstairs in a low hush and the door shut as I come bounding down the stairs. My wet hair perched on my head in a messy bun with an oversized stained sweatshirt and some spandex shorts underneath. When I put my foot on the landing I teeter and almost fall over when I see who is standing in my foyer. “Cameron!” I say shocked. Looking over to a confused and mildly amused Mia. “What are you doing here?”. “I need to talk to you.” he chokes out slowly as his eyes travel the length of my exposed legs and up to the old ratty high school football sweatshirt. I cross my arms and try to hide my pleasure at the way his eyes are devouring me even in my disheveled state. “About what?”
*Cameron POV* I groan sitting up trying to find the source of the knocking that pulled me from my slumber. I hear a quiet tapping on my door and leaning up to check the time on my phone. “Yeah?” 4:36 am. Holy shit. really?! “Cameron, Your mother is here.” Says one of the butlers. “Ok,” I grunt as I swing my legs to the side of my bed tossing my blankets back. The cool air swoops in, making me shiver as I hop up from my bed. With a little added speed I walk to my closet tossing on a pair of sweatpants and my black hoodie. I grin a little thinking about how the last time I had this hoodie on Faith was in my arms. I wish it still smelled like her. Slipping my feet into my plush slippers I walk out of my room and
7:15 rolls around and I sit waiting near Faith’s locker. I check my watch every 5 minutes hoping she shows up soon. She skipped her run club this morning and I have to see her before class today. I've been waiting for 2 hours just to see her face. I know I can't talk to her about this, not when she is struggling with her own things, but just being around her seems to have a calming effect on me. I'm finding myself growing more anxious and worried about my Grandma and angry and murderous about the manipulation Angela and her father are pulling off on my family. How am I literally stuck in a relationship with the world's biggest gold digger? I hear a fake girly giggle and my blood runs cold. Angela. Shit. I start to walk hoping she won't see me. She chats away about the new birthday present I am supposedly getting for her to confess my undying love. I toss my hood up over my head and pretend to be getting i
Walking past the workout room for the 3rd time this week I quickly peek in looking for Faith. The past two days she has skipped her usual running club workouts. Thankfully I was able to see and speak to her all week as Cameron but she still refuses to respond to my messages as Izzy. Thank God there are so many different apps for messaging and calling people and that I had the foresight to use those in place of my real phone number as Izzy. It was much less stressful giving her my number as Cameron knowing she wouldn't be able to discover my secret. At least not based on messages and phone calls. Berry and Mariah come out of the weight room holding hands and giggling, narrowly missing my nose with the door as it swings open. I can see Faith on the leg press machine through the swinging door. I take a deep breath adjusting my hoodie and wiping my sweaty palms on my gym shorts as I walk in head slightly down
*Faith POV* I can't help but feel like I'm on cloud 9. I'm actually friends with Cameron, Izzy likes me, I mean really likes me. And though I have feelings for Cameron, knowing Izzy feels the same way I do for him is enough to make me think about a possible future with him when he finally reveals himself. It’s weird how this year has turned out so far. Here we are a few months into senior year and I’ve kissed 3 different guys, gone to a party, had several mental breakdowns and made two new guy friends. Oh and Noah came back. I can slowly feel myself opening up, letting people in. ok not very many people and both of them are secrets, but hey it's a step in the right direction. I mean I'm going to have to be friendly at college if I want to make it through I suppose, We will just call this all a learning experience. I try to keep the smile from my face as I wal
The bell dings as I slip out of the janitor's closet, closing the door behind me softly. Twice now I have sought out the solitude of this closet. I might as well move in at this point. I spent the better part of the last 50 minutes trying to make sense of what was happening with dad. Should I tell Mia and Noah? Do I call mom? I have no idea how to handle this and I hate even more that I'm starting to care. I pull out my phone as I stare at the screen trying to contemplate which move is the right one. Is there even a right move in these situations? A hand comes flying into my peripheral vision right as it lands softly on my forehead. Looking up startled my eyes settle on the corner of the lockers that are right in front of my head.. I gasp looking up and following the long muscular arm to see the hand belongs to Cameron. He offers me a confused and concerned look as I step back from the corner and he remov
Warm water trickles down my leg as another contraction squeezes my insides in an invisible vice grip. I groan loudly, clutching the counter and leaning over. I hear a clattering beside me and I look over, seeing Izzy holding his little stuffed puppy, his eyes wide in fear. He looks so much like Cameron right now. I smile through the pain as he tentatively steps closer. “Mommy, you peeped your pants on the floor?” he asks in his sweet 3-year-old voice and I chuckle. “No baby, mommy is going to have a baby. Do you know where mommy’s phone is?” I ask, hoping he might remember where I had it last since I never can recall these days where I put anything. “Um. Yep!” His tiny little legs work hard as he runs out of the bathroom and bangs around in the living room. “Iz. Izzy?” I call to him. “Yeah, mommy?” “Did you find it?” He walks into the bathroom, holding my phone, and I nearly fall over with rel
4 years later, *Cameron POV* I wipe my sweaty palms on my khaki pants. Faith’s name rings through the speaker system and a single graduation cap rises from the sea of green as she makes her way to the stage. Noah and I jump to our feet, screaming and cheering for her. It doesn’t matter to me that every man and woman graduating is wearing the same robes and hat. My Faith looks a thousand times better than all of them. Her auburn hair shimmers in the sunlight as she climbs the stairs, a stunning, excited smile on her perfect face. There is no doubt in my mind that this woman is the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. She shakes the dean’s hand and pauses for a minute while photos are snapped. Noah and I take our seats and he leans over to me anxiously. “Ok, dude. I’m freaking out for you,” he whispers. I shoot him a scowl, and he just chuckles and shrugs. Noah and I quickly became good friends and then, as fate wou
*4 months later* * Faith POV* “Come on, Faith!” Cameron shouts “Run faster!” Mia screeches “Yeah, pretend Mia is coming for you!” Noah adds. I can hear an oof from him, which makes me smile, knowing Mia probably whacked him. I try to tune them out as I run by them on my last lap, hurtling towards the finish line. I need to hone in and focus. Currently, I’m sitting in second place with Mariah right on my heels. My heart is racing with the sheer adrenaline of the race and my legs are exhausted. They feel like jello but I push harder, faster than I have ever gone before. Little by little, I gain on the girl in front of me. Each step vibrates through my leg, pulling me closer to my last victory.
“Do you guys think it's stupid of me to keep doing family therapy?” I ask Mia, Noah, and Cameron. They all look around at each other, waiting for someone to talk. “That’s up to you,” Mia says. “If you think you need to do it to get the closure you need, then I think it’s exactly what you need,” “You have to remember that you are un-hashing a lot of heavy stuff. You are reopening old wounds so that you can heal appropriately. It’s going to be tough in the beginning.” Noah adds. “You said Uncle John is back to actually showing up, right?” Mia asks, and I nod. I forgot how long it’s been since we’ve sat and had a serious conversation about it all since she spends most of her time with Noah and I’ve been busy with Cameron. “Did he give a good excuse?” Cameron asks. “He went back to visit his AA mentor and talk about everything. His mentor helped him find a therapist here and Dad claims he is going daily now.” I say, sh
*Faith POV* The car idles as I sit and stare at the garage door. A stray tear slowly weaves its way down my cheek as I swipe at it furiously. I hate feeling like this. My therapist keeps telling me that healing is a process and even when I ‘heal’ I’ll still have moments when I’m not ok. And today I’m not ok. I feel emotionally drained, and all I want to do is sleep for days. I hate these scars that make me feel so ugly and imperfect. I have done so well compartmentalizing all my shit so I could help and be there for Cameron. And it felt amazing to do that. I regret nothing. But now I’m being bowled over by my own insecurities and internal pain and I feel so alone. I have people I can call who would be here in a moment for me. But I feel terrible for bothering them with my sob stories. Mia called me the moment I left Cameron his food to ask if we could reschedule our girls-only night. Of course, I said yes. She is in love and happy
The arcade is bustling and the sounds of the games surrounding me remind me just how alive and vibrant this place is. I sit at one of the tables towards the back with a now cold pepperoni pizza as I watch everyone move around me. A young girl is crying because she lost the game while her older brother chuckles and tries to console her. The boy to the left sits at the table drinking his soda while being engrossed in some random comic strip in his hand. I look to the center of the store and I swear I can see her. Standing there in front of a young boy who looks just like me. I blink back the burn of tears, letting the memory play itself out before me as if it’s a movie of my life. “Oh, my sweet little Izzy. I promise the machines are clean,” she assures me with a sweet smile. & year old me just smiles in excitement. “Shouldn’t I be at school?” ten-year-old me asked her. “Not today. Today we are celebrating yo
“How’s Edith?” Noah asks as he walks up to Faith and me. It’s been a few days since her stroke and there still isn’t much change. Though she woke up, she still looks like she is not completely there and it’s slowly killing me inside. “She’s hanging on.” Faith answers for me, entwining our hands and offering me a supportive smile. “Well, that’s good to hear,” Noah says, trying to make conversation as he sits at our lunch table. I like Noah. He seems to be a genuine guy who thinks the world of his two best friends. Who doesn’t respect a guy who can put up with two polar opposite girls at the same time? Ever since the time we all hung out in Faith and Mia’s living room, he and I have had a new mutual respect for one another. One that I am certain will grow into a wonderful friendship. Which is refreshing since I really only have Faith. Being the popular guy comes with a lot of things, one of them being lots of acquaintances but no
Each blip on the monitor is a reminder that she is still here, still fighting. It’s been a whirlwind since we arrived. Flurries of medical personnel bustle in and out checking vitals, changing liquids, offering water for Faith, dad, and me. She had a stroke, that’s what the doctor said. He said extreme stress brought it on. I rode here with her in the ambulance. I just knew she would wake up if I left her alone for even a minute, and I couldn’t miss that. Yet she still hasn’t opened her eyes or even squeezed my hand. I know she will recover. It doesn’t take a medical genius to know that she is just too amazing to leave me. She would never do that to me. Faith walks up behind me and snakes her hands over my shoulder, hugging my back and giving me a kiss on the cheek. “Hey, how are you doing?” she whispers. The heat of her breath tickles my ears as I turn slightly to see her face. She looks exhausted and stunning. How
“Well then, I will find a job and buy us a double-wide to live in,” Dad smirks. I choke on my laugh when her face falls, and she grows pale. “Fine. I’ll sign them and go to John.” She says. It’s blatantly obvious that she is trying to get a rise out of my father, but the only reaction she gets is a bark of laughter from Faith. “My dad?” Faith is trying to contain her laughter while my mother grows red with anger. “I’m sorry. You think he wants you after you tried to destroy him by getting him addicted to drugs?” “Woah, what!” I look at my mom as she stands looking guilty. Now it’s my Father’s turn to turn red with anger. “You gave him drugs?” My father says, his voice rising as it echoes through the house.”