Chapter 13 - Uncertainty

Sera’s P.O.V

Cold sweat was plastered to my face. My long curls stuck to the back of my neck waking me with a start. I looked around an unfamiliar room with a panic building fast. The sound of my mother’s snoring reminded me where I was. I closed my eyes trying to slow my breathing before I woke anyone else up while trying to remember the nightmare I had just experienced. I remembered a silver wolf, I knew she was a female but did not speak to me. Her blinding blue eyes flashed with… understanding? Before shrill screams echoed through my mind as her once silver fur turned blood red. Her canines had been fully extended at me, a low menacing growl emitted from her throat before she lunged... I tried to run my fingers through my hair momentarily forgetting they were mattered from my sweat. Groaning I pulled my sheets back getting out of the now damp bed before feeling my way to the bathroom.

It was still dark and there was no way I was going to wake up anyone. I bit my lip tempted to wake Emma, she would know how to comfort me. After all, she had many nightmares through the years. But, after revealing my secret yesterday I really didn’t know how to talk to her. A sensation of sadness and regret filled me as I thought back to her fear-stricken response. I knew deep down that was always how she was going to react. But a part of me had truly hoped she would understand. That she would know I wasn’t like the monster that haunted her dreams for so long.

I closed the bathroom door slowly hoping not to disturb anyway before turning on the light. I yelped in pain, blinding myself. I blinked quickly frustrated that I had done that before looking at the damage my restless sleep had caused. My once bouncy sliver curls were mattered together in a form that could only be described as that old pile of dirty clothes I hid behind my door back home. My eyes were puffy from lack of sleep with black bags underneath showing the world how stressed I truly was. I frowned at myself wishing I could be as flawless as Emma. No matter how dirty or messy her hair got she always looked good, like a princess.

 I turned on the shower, thankful that for once I could use as much hot water as I wanted without disturbance. While I soaked my hair with probably way too much conditioner I let my mind wander back to that handsome stranger. Damon? Yes, that was his name I thought remembering that cocky smirk that made me want to kiss his full lips. How sweet and tender his embrace had been, I bit my lip imagining him hold me again. Touching me. What was hiding behind that bulge I had spotted in his tight shorts…? I slapped my leg wishing away such thoughts, someone as hot as him would never truly be interested in me. He was probably with someone way hotter than me now. A pang of jealously hit me as I imagined him looking at someone else like he had looked at me… What is wrong with you? I thought to myself, picking up a shower scrubber I tried to distract myself. The foamy bubbles that formed on my skin as I scrubbed felt good. I couldn’t help thinking back to how good Damon looked without a shirt, how good would he look fully naked?  My heart fluttered thinking about how maybe I would see him again, not that I would admit it.

My thoughts shifted to Erik, my father. Maybe he wouldn’t be too bad. Maybe just maybe I had built him up in my mind as a monster.  I don’t know if I could forgive him for hurting my mother, I did know that I needed him. I had not told anyone about the changes I had noticed happening within my body, I knew they would not be able to help me. Some of the changes were scary but most were kind of cool. Like my senses were getting better, I could see better in the dark for one. Not perfectly but like I had a really dull torch. My agility was way better. I mean I had always been pretty good at sneaking as I liked to hunt but now… now it was like I was a silent ghost. The scary changes were my eyes, sometimes I swear they would change to an icy blue. Like the wolf that had been haunting my dreams. They only ever did that when I was really mad or upset. It was a hard one to hide but I managed. The other change that scared me was I finally got my first period. It had been a painful experience, but I managed. I know I should have told someone, but I was scared. Mother would have insisted she take me to a doctor and I really did not want anyone knowing about what was going on till I knew. Mum had kind of assumed all was good in that respect after I had slept with my ex, the first time was messy and I couldn’t hide the evidence.

I gaged in repulsion thinking of my ex, the basted. Stanley. I have no idea why I was with him, sure he was moderately attractive with his tall height, muscular build, and good looks. But he was the most arrogant, up himself jerk I had ever had the displeasure of meeting. Always obsessed with how ‘hot’ he was, how women would throw themselves at him and how lucky I was that he was into me. He even had the audacity to blame me for him sleeping around. That because I didn’t dress up or spend enough time with him what should I have expected.

“A man has needs Sera”

His cocky, stupid voice rang through my head as I gritted my teeth before slapping the wall. Damon would be just like him. Arrogant pricks. No. I must not think of things that will upset me, not today. I stopped the shower sighing, I needed to get a grip on my thoughts. Today was going to be hard enough without letting my mind wander. I got dressed into a comfortable pair of black sweatpants and a simple dark blue tank top before leaving the hotel room. There was a little bakery down the street that surely would be open for breakfast.

“Thank you, Sera!”

Emma was eating one of the pastries I had bought before waking her and our mother up, my heart was a little crushed at her using my actual name. But I was thankful she had even spoken to me.

“No problems EmEm.”

I gave her a small but warm smile in return, she ignored me turning away. That hurt too but I let it go. I needed to give her time to adjust. She would come around, she had to. We had a little over an hour left before my father’s Beta, Rodrik would be here to collect us. I looked over at our mother to see her staring at the wall deep in thought. I wondered if she was nervous, angry, or scared but I didn’t dare speak. I was nervous enough as it was and did not want to give it away.

“Are you excited Sera?”

Emma’s voice was back to its bubbly self but I did not like her using my actual name, I suppressed my urge to correct it back to my pet name and tried smiling back to her.

“A little I guess.”

She nodded before looking towards our mother.

“Mum, do you think I’ll be able to go explore or with the Alpha force me to be hidden?”

Mother looked at her appalled and at first, I thought it was because of the aggressive tone she used when referring to my father.

“Why on earth would you think he would ‘hide’ you? Like some sort of prisoner?”

I raised my eyebrow, honestly, I had not considered how he would feel about Emma. Surely he wouldn’t have any hate against her… Emma held up her hand with 2 fingers extended.

“Well, first off I’m human. Secondly, you have not spoken to him in years. Wouldn’t he assume I am your birth daughter?”

Emma responded calmly looking at our mother expectantly like it was the most obvious thing in the world. What she was referring to clicked in both my and mother's heads at the same time.

“Wait… no he wouldn’t… surely he…”

Mother was lost for words as Emma frowned, I giggled internally seeing her pull a facial expression so close to my own. Before frowning myself, surely mother would have told him? But when would she have? Emma was right…  

“Mum, come on.”

She rolled her eyes.

“As far as he is concerned, I am the product of you sleeping with someone else. Of course, he is going to hate me.”

I couldn’t argue with her logic. Mum had told us both he was her ‘mate’, a bond similar to that of soulmates. He would hate her.

“EmEm, he wouldn’t dare say OR do anything.”

I growled upset at the idea of anyone hurting my sweet sister. If he even dared to say anything I would not hesitate to lash out.

“I know Sera, but I don’t want to have to be around someone who hates me”

Her eyes were pleading as I looked at mother with her waiting for a response. Mother sighed before putting her hands over her face in frustration.

“I promise girls, nothing bad will happen.”

Emma looked happy with this and continued to eat, I was not. How could she promise that someone she had no control over would not hold any malice? Of course, he would take one look at us and assume she had slept with someone else. Not that she shouldn’t have, mum deserved to have someone love her truly. But if what she had told us about mates was true… I made a mental note to keep myself glued to Emma, at least for the first few weeks. Just to make sure she was safe.