I tried to make myself comfortable sleeping on my side, my back facing Caelum. I'm already hyper aware that he's inches away from me in this bed. I'll probably hyperventilate again when I actually see him."Are you sure you're okay now?" He asks."Yeah. Things like this just pass like nothing has happened," I say."This isn't the first time it happened?""Nope. The first time it happened, I was 8. We were in a school play, and I thought it was just being shown to our parents. When I knew it would be shown to the entire school and everyone's families, I panicked. I panicked more when I realized it wasn't just a normal panicky moment…but a full-blown, anxiety-induced attack," I sighed."Everyone laughed at me. They thought I was just being a crybaby. But when I was gasping for breath and our teacher came rushing to my side, they realized something was wrong. But as a bunch of 8-year-olds, no one really knows what a panic attack is. Everyone was scared and panicking, too, thinking I'm dy
Waking up next to Caelum is something I haven't prepared myself for. I kind of forgot that he was in my room, in my bed. As soon as I opened my eyes, I saw him, still sleeping peacefully, lying on his stomach.I pulled back, shocked to see him beside me. What's even more surprising is that he's half naked.I looked under the duvet to make sure I had my PJs on–I have. Then, the early hours of the morning came back to me. The nightmare. The panic attack. And Caelum stayed for the night to make sure the panic didn't return.I sit up and rub my face. It's too early in the morning and my heart is already beating so fast. Seeing Caelum is one thing. Seeing him early in the morning, in my bed, is another thing.But seeing him in my bed? Half naked? No wonder, I'm worked up."Oh, hey. Good morning," Caelum groaned, and his morning voice was deep and gruffy…something inside me just wanted to leap out."Hey, good morning," I replied, trying to keep my voice even, turning my face towards him but
I asked Caelum where the Palace of the Clouds is, and why they call them that. But he just smirked and told me that I'll have to see it for myself."But how will I pack if I don't know where I'm going?""Let Agatha pack the clothes. She'll know. Just bring your necessities and don't worry about anything else. We'll have to make it a surprise for you," he answered, clearly excited about the prospect of leaving the palace.I relented.As I returned to my bedroom, Agatha and the ladies quickly began to work packing some stuff up. I followed them around, trying to figure out where this palace might be based on the clothes they were packing. Of course, Maia led it, making sure I still looked stylish wherever I went."Please, my lady, don't just pull out clothes and wear them however. I will trust in you to at least make them look good," she looked at me.I scoffed."Maia! I may not have your sense of style, but I don't dress that shabbily! Or do I?"She smirked, and I kinda got the idea th
I was tired, but restless. It's still a little early, at least by my standards, so I had a nice hot soak on the massive tub.It was nice to draw my own bath, which I haven't done since I moved to the Palace. I would always try to run it, but as soon as I get to the bathroom, it's already done, complete with rose oils and petals and bath salts.But I have to say, this bathroom is intimidating. It's definitely smaller than the Palace bathrooms–still so much bigger than the normal ones at home–but this one also had that glass wall. I've been assured by Caelum earlier that the glass walls can only see out, not in. But it's still weird to drop my robe and climb onto the tub, naked, when it's conveniently facing the wall.Still, once you get over the initial paranoia that someone might be controlling a drone to look into the bathroom, or someone from the town has a telescope to see into the Palazzo, it's quite nice looking outside while soaking.I can see the outline of the trees now, as we
The first couple of days in the Palazzo were spent on the terrace. I read a classic book I chose from the library, and even lunches were served there.Caelum mostly spent his time with me, in his own little world with a book, or a laptop, or a small portable gaming device. We would sit in companionable silence until the afternoon, where he would take me out into different spots on the mountain with a little picnic basket Sarah and the chef, his husband Marko, had prepared for us.We would sit in meadows or lookout spots until the sun set and the stars appeared. Then, we'd return to the Palazzo, have homemade pizzas and wine, and we'd watch a movie. Caelum picked a fantasy film the first night, I chose a scary one the next, and he was so terrified that we would both jump and scream.When it's time to go back to our own bedrooms, he would always wait for me to get inside my own room with his dimpled smile, and I would listen by my door so I'd know he'd entered his. Then, I would draw a
I cried and kept wiping the tears away. I wanted to stop crying but the tears wouldn't stop and I grew more and more frustrated.Thankfully, Caelum didn't run after me and bothered me. At least he didn't at first.It was about an hour until he finally knocked on my door, just enough time for me to finally stop crying, too. But I wasn't in any mood to talk."Skye? Please, I'm sorry," he called from the door.I wanted to yell at him to go away. I also wanted to yank him in and hug him. But I have no energy to do any of that. Instead, I played my conversation with Caelum earlier over and over and asked myself if I shouldn't have reacted the way I did.In this entire debacle, I just hated myself.After around 15 minutes of knocking and calling out to me with no answer, Caelum stopped.I don't even know how to face him anymore. Sure, he shouldn't have sounded so angry and pissed. Or maybe assume something worse about someone he didn't know.But was my reaction warranted? Why was I so angry
It's not my first kiss. I have kissed boys before Finn, too. Just two, actually. And then Finn.But all those moments were nothing compared to this. It felt like my atoms have dispersed across the universe and have felt all the pleasures the stars have to offer, and then arranged back to create this version of me.My heart burst in my chest, it's almost painful.Caelum's lips were soft and gentle and warm. He is warm. His hands snaked their way to my back and pulled me into him and I wanted nothing else but to melt into his arms.Now, I know what it is like to be kissed by someone you love and love you. It's so much better than all those kisses made in the darkness of cars, or theaters, or under the bleachers.We pulled apart, and as soon as we did, I wanted more. Craved for his touch."I thought you'd never had someone before?" I asked him, almost breathlessly."Never. Why?"He looked confused. And he looked so beautiful even when his brows were furrowed together, lips slightly parte
Breakfast at the diner was amazing. The pancake was fluffy and the sausage just had the right amount of spice. We also had eggs cooked just how we liked it and a cup of hot, creamy, and rich chocolate.It was so simple, yet so satisfying.All the while, people would come and go, stopping by our table ever so briefly to greet us and tell Caelum how big he has grown.They were also so very sweet to me, and I can sense they were all just genuinely good people."I love it here," I sighed happily as we left the diner."It makes you fall in love with it, doesn't it?""You know what this town reminds me of? Those little villages in snow globes. My mom tried collecting them once, but after Serenity broke one when we were kids and had to have stitches, she gave them away. I missed those snow globes," I said."Funny that you mention that. I'm taking you to the gift shop. They do have small snow globes that I've fancied ever since I was a kid," he said as we walked towards the Rover. He opened t
There were several things that happened all at once: royal guards were pulling Duke Fontaine from me, there were loud gasps from the audiences, Caelum running towards me, and flashes of bright lights.The latter was the first one to pull me back into my body.Fucking hell. The media is on a rampage, and I will most likely have my face everywhere from newspapers to magazines to news channels both on TV and online.But before I could react, Caelum was beside me, his back from the audience and blocking me from the cameras."Are you okay?" He worriedly asked."Get off me, you scoundrels! I'm assaulted and you hold me?!" The Duke was screaming. He looked at me with such rage. "You filthy peasant!"He tried to lunge at me but the royal guards held him back. Caelum stepped in front of me, holding me back."Get him out of here," Caelum said, his voice low but full of authority.As the royal guards dragged the Duke away, who was still screaming obscenities and lashing out at the guards, I look
"I'm surprised! You did a decent job on the interviews, my lady. I think they liked you. Well, maybe not Harrison but he doesn't like anybody except himself," a scratchy voice from a man said as the press were walking away.I looked behind me and saw an overweight old man clearly in a toupee with an attractive young woman by his side. She was pretty, but she kept bowing her head, as if she's trying so hard to disappear into the shadows.Meanwhile, the man wore a general's uniform with dozens of medals pinned on it.Judging by his arrogant stance and condescending tone, he did not earn those medals.I smiled tightly."Ah, pardon my manners. I'm Duke Anton Fontaine of Michestershire. I thought you would have known me, but clearly you didn't take the time to memorize the faces of your soon-to-be family?" He tsked, but held his hand out to me and looked like I should be grateful to be in his presence.I looked at his outstretched hand. I took it ever so slightly and shook it.Then, I stre
For the past few days, it was the same routine: Madam Roserta in the mornings, lunch, Gonzalo sessions in the afternoon, dress fittings to finish my dress, and awkward dinners with the royal family.According to both Madam Roserta and Gonzalo, I have improved a lot. Gonzalo even said he can see me in interviews and I felt a sense of pride.In fact, I've started to believe my own lies, which is kind of good, but also not really. I just kept reminding myself that this persona is only for the cameras.It's also been raining a lot, so we don't go out for a walk that much.But I do like hanging out in the seating room near the fireplace and reading. Caelum would sit opposite me and do his own thing, and just like in the Palazzo, we would mostly sit in comfortable silence.The day of the Charity Gala is as hectic as the engagement party. It took hours to get me ready, but I didn't complain.For some reason, I have a nagging feeling that something will go wrong. I have been anxious about the
After a week of mostly bliss in the Palazzo, I'm back in a little study hall with Madam Roserta. I guessed the whole vacation also practically threw me in square one because she kept shaking my head every time I stood or walked or sat.At least I still have the cutlery memorized.But that's not even the worst part. Mornings are for Madam Roserta on basic palace and royalty etiquette, and afternoons are for Gonzalo, a famous media reporter who always interviews royal families and nobles of not just Arcadia but the world.He's now sitting in front of me, going through his tablet."Alright, Lady Vivienne, these are possible questions that the media will ask. I want you to take a look at them and really understand each question. Then, I'll ask a few at random. Understood?"I nodded my head. I opened the document he sent me on my tablet and I just stared at the list of questions."They're too many," I whispered, mostly to myself. But Gonzalo heard me."Well, it has been a while since we ha
A day after the pool incident, things were a little awkward with Caelum and I. It's as if every time I looked at him, I'd remember how much I felt wanted and how I wanted him.He tried avoiding me all morning, and it left a bitter taste in my mouth and a pang to my heart."Hey, you okay?" I asked, finally walking up to him on the terrace. He had just finished a game and it was quite obvious that he was frustrated. If it was because he didn't win or something else–like what happened last night–I'm not entirely sure.But he jumped when I walked to him. It's as if he forgot I existed and he was in deep thought."Skye. Of course I am," he replied, albeit a bit awkwardly. He tried to smile, too."No, you're not," I tell him as I plop down the chair beside him. "You've been avoiding me all morning.""I'm not…"I just looked at him to say "you think I believe you?""Look, I know you're avoiding me because of last night," I told him. He blushes. "It's really not your fault. Or mine. It's just
Breakfast at the diner was amazing. The pancake was fluffy and the sausage just had the right amount of spice. We also had eggs cooked just how we liked it and a cup of hot, creamy, and rich chocolate.It was so simple, yet so satisfying.All the while, people would come and go, stopping by our table ever so briefly to greet us and tell Caelum how big he has grown.They were also so very sweet to me, and I can sense they were all just genuinely good people."I love it here," I sighed happily as we left the diner."It makes you fall in love with it, doesn't it?""You know what this town reminds me of? Those little villages in snow globes. My mom tried collecting them once, but after Serenity broke one when we were kids and had to have stitches, she gave them away. I missed those snow globes," I said."Funny that you mention that. I'm taking you to the gift shop. They do have small snow globes that I've fancied ever since I was a kid," he said as we walked towards the Rover. He opened t
It's not my first kiss. I have kissed boys before Finn, too. Just two, actually. And then Finn.But all those moments were nothing compared to this. It felt like my atoms have dispersed across the universe and have felt all the pleasures the stars have to offer, and then arranged back to create this version of me.My heart burst in my chest, it's almost painful.Caelum's lips were soft and gentle and warm. He is warm. His hands snaked their way to my back and pulled me into him and I wanted nothing else but to melt into his arms.Now, I know what it is like to be kissed by someone you love and love you. It's so much better than all those kisses made in the darkness of cars, or theaters, or under the bleachers.We pulled apart, and as soon as we did, I wanted more. Craved for his touch."I thought you'd never had someone before?" I asked him, almost breathlessly."Never. Why?"He looked confused. And he looked so beautiful even when his brows were furrowed together, lips slightly parte
I cried and kept wiping the tears away. I wanted to stop crying but the tears wouldn't stop and I grew more and more frustrated.Thankfully, Caelum didn't run after me and bothered me. At least he didn't at first.It was about an hour until he finally knocked on my door, just enough time for me to finally stop crying, too. But I wasn't in any mood to talk."Skye? Please, I'm sorry," he called from the door.I wanted to yell at him to go away. I also wanted to yank him in and hug him. But I have no energy to do any of that. Instead, I played my conversation with Caelum earlier over and over and asked myself if I shouldn't have reacted the way I did.In this entire debacle, I just hated myself.After around 15 minutes of knocking and calling out to me with no answer, Caelum stopped.I don't even know how to face him anymore. Sure, he shouldn't have sounded so angry and pissed. Or maybe assume something worse about someone he didn't know.But was my reaction warranted? Why was I so angry
The first couple of days in the Palazzo were spent on the terrace. I read a classic book I chose from the library, and even lunches were served there.Caelum mostly spent his time with me, in his own little world with a book, or a laptop, or a small portable gaming device. We would sit in companionable silence until the afternoon, where he would take me out into different spots on the mountain with a little picnic basket Sarah and the chef, his husband Marko, had prepared for us.We would sit in meadows or lookout spots until the sun set and the stars appeared. Then, we'd return to the Palazzo, have homemade pizzas and wine, and we'd watch a movie. Caelum picked a fantasy film the first night, I chose a scary one the next, and he was so terrified that we would both jump and scream.When it's time to go back to our own bedrooms, he would always wait for me to get inside my own room with his dimpled smile, and I would listen by my door so I'd know he'd entered his. Then, I would draw a