A SHADOW WOLF

ROSA'S POV

With shaky hands, I combed my fingers through my hair. I wasn't trying to appear more presentable, no. I was simply nervous. Actually, I was scared.

Tonight was the shadow moon festival. It was a very significant event that was celebrated annually in our pack, and today, the shadow wolves were to be chosen. That was why I was nervous. The pack's priestess had somehow selected me as part of the few wolves who had the potentials of being shadow wolves.

It came as a surprise to my step mother and siblings, seeing as they never thought that I had what it took to become something great. I guess my father was more shocked because he knew that my wolf was deformed. So how could I possibly be a shadow wolf, when my wolf could hardly defend itself, due to its deformity, talk more of being a part of such a formidable army? If not for anything else, I was grateful to my father for not having said a word about the deformed nature of my wolf, to anyone.

It had been a year since I had my first shift, and the goddess knows I wouldn't have been able to survive the mockery that would have most definitely come from my step family, had they an idea about it.

"I guess you have had enough time wasting ours." I heard my father's gruff voice, and turned to see him standing by my door. I may have been grateful over the fact that he remained quiet about my wolf, but that was it. I was grateful for nothing more.

I had been stupid to think that he had finally come around, when I had my first shift. It came as a shock to me, when he returned to his old ways the following day. In fact, it was as if he became worse. I guess my shift had been a huge disappointment to him, and that was probably why he had begun to treat me much worse. This past year had been my worst, and I knew the subsequent years were gonna be much horrible.

"I'm sorry, father." I muttered, and stood up from the chair that I sat on. I took some steps towards him, and didn't miss the manner in which he looked at my outfit. I knew it wasn't a great fit. Atleast, not as good as the clothes I used to wear when mother was still alive. But had he forgotten that new clothes were something I haven't had the pleasure of receiving, for the past year?

After my shift, it was as if I began to grow so rapidly and now, most of my old clothes looked undersized when I wore them.

"What is your plan? To show the entire pack that your family doesn't cater for your well being?!" He blew out in rage. Too scared to say a word, for the fear of being hit, I remained silent. "What nonsense are you putting on?"

"This is the best of my clothes, father." I muttered, tears stinging my eyes.

"Honey, what has you yelling?" I looked up to see Lena standing beside my father. She turned to look at me, and let out a mockful laugh. "I understand that you dress so homelessly on normal days, but on a day as such as this?"

"This is the best I have, ma." I repeated the same thing I had said to my father.

"Not surprised." She shrugged, releasing an exaggerated sigh as she looked at my father. "Darling, she's had us waiting for a while now, I'm tired already."

"I'm sorry love, but...." He trailed off, glaring at my dress.

"Come ooonnn, don't worry about her dress." She tried convincing him, but he still looked a bit bothered. Releasing a sigh of frustration, she rolled her eyes. "Fine, there may be a remedy to this."

****

****

Remedy. Remedy. Remedy.

That was all that went through my mind as we all walked out of the house. When I had looked at myself in the mirror, I didn't know how to react or feel. Lena should have just left me wearing my undersized clothes. But I guess that for some reason, father thought that oversized clothes were better off than undersized ones. Apparently, Lena had given me a very old dress of hers, to change into.

When she had talked about having a remedy, I thought she probably had in mind to borrow one of Eva's outfit, for me to wear tonight.

Eva was my step sister; Lena's second child. I was older than her by 2 years, but because she was very well fed, she looked bigger than I was.

Through out the short trip to the pack house, where the shadow moon festival was anually hosted, Eva had not stopped making snide remarks as to how I looked. What could I do, than remain quiet and simply swallow her mockery?

"Finally." Lena sighed, the moment we got to the pack house. Our house wasn't too far off from there, so it had been a stroll of about 15 minutes.

I could already hear the high pitched cheers and laughter from outside the gates, and a part of me wanted to just turn and make a dash for our house. I couldn't understand why, but that Iittle part of me knew that the day was going to end disastrously for me. Of course, today was going to be the day I finally showed my wolf to the pack. It was unavoidable. And worse still, I had no idea how they were gonna react to its deformity. I guess my own father's reaction had provided more than enough hint as to that.

'I'm sorry'. My wolf sulked in my head, and I released a low sigh, feeling bad that I made her feel so useless.

'No, I'm the sorry one. I shouldn't have thought that'.

'But it's the truth. I'm useless to you. I've made your life miserable.' She muttered almost inaudibly.

'No! If anything, you have been the best companion to me. We both know I wouldn't have survived this last horrific year, without you'.

"Why the hell are you walking so slowly?" My father's angry voice interrupted the little moment with my wolf. I looked up to see that they had all walked a good distance ahead of me. Not being able to make out a word, I timidly ran and joined the rest of them.

"Maybe she is having double minds already." I heard Duncan say.

"Same thing I thought, brother." Eva chuckled. "Maybe she has realized she possibly cannot be selected as a shadow wolf."

"That's enough, you two." Came father's gruff voice, and I looked up at him in shock.

He may not have stood up for me, but that was the first time he was asking them not to speak to me in that manner.

"Dad!" Eva exclaimed in disappointment. "You just ruined the fun." She gave a disrespectful scoff, and increased her steps. She and Duncan made their way in, through the gates of the pack house, and the rest of us followed suite.

All through the few minutes we walked to the event ground, I couldn't help but imagine being the one who had scoffed at father. I probably would have been seeing stars by now, from the impact of his slap.

We got to the event ground and I couldn't help but notice that this year's festival had more luxurious decorations. The seats were arranged in a circular pattern, just leaving 3 linear paths in between, for people to walk in and out. In the middle of the circle, was a very large space, with a bon fire in the middle of it. From where I stood, I could see our Alpha and his family, together with the pack's priestess.

I found myself smiling when Priestess Ivana spotted me, and waved at me. She was part of the few people who genuinely cared for me.

When she had selected me as one of the shadow wolf candidates, my step family thought it was simply because she favoured me. Regardless of the fact that I knew she was incorruptible, I had started to believe it too.

When all the newly shifted wolves had been asked to assemble at Priestess Ivana's shrine for the shadow wolf candidate selection 3 weeks ago, I didn't go because I had hope of being selected as a shadow wolf candidate. I went just to fulfill all righteousness. So you can only imagine the shock I felt, when she placed her hand on my belly, and insisted the energy within me was overwhelming!

I pulled myself out of my thoughts, and focused on night ahead. The pack house was really jampacked with a lot of excited pack members. It was no surprise, seeing as the shadow moon festival was the most anticipated event of the year.

The Shadow wolves were special wolves, tasked with the great duty of safeguarding and defending the pack, especially during rogue attacks. This was because of their ability to adapt to the colour of their surroundings, thereby taking their attackers by surprise. They were like Chameleons, but in form of wolves.

Why they were called the shadow wolves? It was because of the manner at which their abilities worked at night. They basically mixed with the shadows at night, making themselves invisible.

'What if we end up not being a shadow wolf?'

'What if we end up being a shadow wolf?' I and my wolf asked each other at the same time.

'Stop being so pessimistic'. My wolf howled in my head. 'What if we actually end up being a shadow wolf? What is so wrong with such thought?' She asked.

'Nothing'. I found myself admitting. If we ended up being a shadow wolf indeed, then I would no longer suffer as much as before. I would be opportuned to attend the shadow wolves academy. It was a special academy, solely designed for training potential shadow wolves. It was a 3-year training, afterwhich the wolves would graduate and officially become inducted into the Shadow Army.

Atleast for 3 years, I would not see my father or step family, since the academy was boarding. I doubted my step family would feel inclined to pay for a visit within those 3 years either.

Every year, a handful of werewolves graduated from the shadow wolves academy, and in the same vain, new students are also accepted into the academy. This night, we were going to be celebrating the recent graduates and officially induct them into the Shadow Army.

The night flew in a blur, and the next thing I knew, they were formally inducting the last of the just graduated Shadow wolves.

"The selected shadow wolf candidates would be called on soon." I heard one of the pack members whisper to her little pup, who giggled in anticipation.

I could feel my father's gaze on me, but couldn't bring myself to look at him. For all I knew, he was certainly glaring, and I didn't need anything else to dampen my spirits tonight.

Sooner than was expected, the candidates of the shadow wolves were being called upon, and my hands began to shake badly. I knew no one was staring at me, but it felt like all eyes were on me. It was at times like this that I missed mom, because she would hold my hands and pat them softly.

Taking in a deep breathe and hoping it would make me feel better eventually, I stood from my seat, and made my way out. Through the linear path in between the circular arrangement, I walked to the middle of the circle. There were up to 20 other people who stepped out alongside me.

"Take off your shoes and form a circle around the bon fire!!" I didn't need to look up, to recognize that was Priestess Ivana's voice. Immediately, the others began to form a circle around the bonfire, and I joined in.

After a few seconds, we had formed a perfect circle, and Priestess Ivana stepped in, inching closer to the fire. At some point, she had gotten too close to the fire, and I could feel my heart beating in worry for her. I could never get used to that part of her shadow moon rituals.

"Ye Shadow wolves!!!" She suddenly growled so loudly, as her head flung backwards. Her back was bent so low, and the tips of her black hair kissed the ground. I watched in awe as her body vibrated in that position, while she chanted some incantations. I was always going to be in awe of the woman, no matter how many times I watched her perform at the Shadow moon festival.

I was still lost in admiration, when the bonfire suddenly went off, making the entire place lose its illumination. I could hear whispers from the rest of the pack members, and my heartbeat accelerated. I knew it was time.

Almost immediately, I felt some drops of water splash onto my face, and I lost control. I felt myself hitting the ground beneath me, as I struggled to break free. It felt like I was trapped somewhere, and couldn't find my way out.

'Come forth!' I heard a deafening voice, and it felt like my head was about splitting in two halves. The next second, I blanked out.