The Lost Blood

"Serenity, hon? Where are you?"

I heard my mom calling me downstairs, but I'm still inside the bedroom, staring at my reflection in the mirror.

I don't want it. I don't want to be married, nor entertain the mere thought of it.

"Serenity?" my mom called again, the impatience evident in her tone. "Are you still inside your room? I told you to move quickly. The Continental family was waiting for us."

My stomach churned upon hearing those words. It only made me freeze in my spot, wanting to run away as fast as I could. But if I do that, my parents would surely be disappointed at me. 

After I work hard to please them, I can't let everything go in vain just because of this marriage.

"I'm coming!" I replied, forcing a smile as I opened the door. "Sorry if I took longer to fix myself than expected. I-I'm nervous, maybe because it's Hans."

It's true. I'm nervous, but not because of Hans. I'm nervous that I might mess with that date they had set up for us. I don't like him as a person, what more as his wife?

"Silly. Why would you be nervous? You look great. Vien successfully enhanced your features with the make up," my mom replied, encouraging me with her words. "I'm sure that if he sees you in the restaurant later, he'll want to marry you."

My God. One more thing I hear about that, I'll vomit.

"Well... That's a good thing, right?" I asked, forcing a laugh. "I heard the Miller and Continental Group were forming an alliance to compete with the other high-ranking companies. Is that... the reason for this marriage?"

Please, say no. Please tell me that this marriage was for my sake, and because you love me and you wanted to protect me.

Maybe if I hear those words, it would help me to endure this arranged marriage longer.

"Of course." Mom grinned from ear to ear. "You know that the easiest way to form an alliance is through an arranged marriage, right? Your dad and I were lucky to have a daughter. What could have happened if we didn't have you?"

Hearing those words shattered my heart into pieces. 

For them, I was just a puppet. A robot they could use whatever they please, and dispose of me when I'm not useful anymore. 

I knew that even before, but I still tried to gain their approval. I always try to make them happy even if it means losing mine.

How could they do this to me? How... could they endure seeing me suffering for the sake of their greed?

"Serenity..." I heard my mom call in a sweet, gentle tone. "You're thinking this is unfair, aren't you? Because we're choosing the man you're going to marry?"

"I-It's not like that, Mom." I sighed, my gaze fixated on the floor. "I just thought... I could decide when it comes to this aspect."

It was them who chose everything for me. My clothes, my friends, my college course, and even how I should eat and sit in front of friends... They all taught it to me. 

At this point, I don't even know my likes and dislikes.

And now, I don't even have the chance to choose the man I'll spend the rest of my life with?

My mom's brows furrowed, looking at me with confusion. "Who told you that?"

"Who told me what?"

"That you have a say in anything when it comes to your life?"

Her tone suddenly grew cold and intimidating. It sent shivers down my spine. 

Every time my mom or dad gets mad, I'm the one they use to release stress with. Although it only happened back when I was a child, I can't help but tremble as those horrible memories resurface.

"Serenity, I'm the one who gave birth to you and raised you. And your father is the one who paid for the food you eat, the dress you wear, and even with your studies and other hobbies. So... What made you think that you can decide on your own?"

I swallowed hard, the pain of her words cutting deeply into my heart.

I know that this is what they had thought about me... yet why am I still hurting?

"Don't ask about nonsense things and just fix yourself. Make yourself presentable, and seduce him to your best ability. Do you understand?" Mom said and glared at me. "Once he calls off the wedding, I don't know what we might do to you."

Suddenly, her phone rang. Her lips curved into a smile, seeing who the caller was.

"Hello, Mr. Continental?" Mom greeted, her tone ingratiating. "Ah, is that so?"

I frowned, looking at how her smile faded, yet she maintained her composure.

"No, we're not ready yet... My daughter was just about to fix herself," she added to say, glaring at me. "It's fine. Maybe this isn't the right moment for them to meet yet. I'm sure there will be a next time... Yeah. Right, have a good day."

I looked at her in curiosity. "Mom, what was that?"

"Our appointment with the Continental family was cancelled," mom said, suppressing her rage as she massaged her temples. "This isn't the first time they did it to us. Who the fuck do they think they are?!"

It was bad news for her and dad, but I can't help but smile. She's right. This isn't the first time it happened.

It only means that Hans could not also be interested in me, or in this marriage.

That's great!

"Hey, where are you going?" Mom asked as she saw me going downstairs. "You don't have any appointments with your instructors today, nor with your friends."

I reached for my phone and showed Mia's message to me. "Now I have one."

***

Thankfully, Mia invited me to drink at a bar with her. Her family was filthy rich, almost the same as the Continental family, and we're also in alliance with them. 

That is the only reason why my parents are letting me hang out with her, knowing how alcoholic and rebellious she was.

"Serenity! Heyyy!" Mia called me, her tone already tipsy. "Where have you been? I've been waiting for you!"

"I just went to my dad's company." I sighed and sat beside her. "If I don't tell him my whereabouts, they scold me, or worse, lock me up in my room."

"God. Lock you up?" Mia asked, looking at me in disbelief. "What are you, a child? Goodness gracious, you're already twenty three years old!"

I sighed again, feeling all the weight on my shoulders. They won't let me decide on my own, yet they're willing to marry me to someone I barely met. 

What's wrong with them?

"Give me that," I told Mia as I took the glass she was holding. I drank the beer until the last sip. "W-What the hell? Is this what beer tastes like?"

"Yes, Missy." Mia took the glass away from me. "Damn, girl. We've been going to a bar together for a long time now, yet this is the first time you drank beer. You're dealing with a very, very bad problem, aren't you?"

I didn't answer her question. No, I couldn't. My stomach churned as I couldn't digest the beer properly. Shit, I think I'm going to vomit. I want to release everything.

The expectations, the pain, and the fact that I can't fight against my parents although I wanted to.

"I don't want to be married..." I said as tears cascaded down my eyes.

"Then don't!" Mia responded, her tone laced with worry. "What's with the random topic? Are your parents trying to force you to marry anyone or something?"

I remained silent, letting the alcohol consume my body. I only drank a little, yet my head is starting to spin.

So much for all the make-up and the beautiful black dress I have for today.

"They did?!" Mia asked, her eyes widening in disbelief. "What the! We're still in college! How could they do that to you?!"

"I-I'm leaving," I said as I stood up. I need to breathe.

"Let me accompany you—”

"No. No, please... I want to be alone for now," I told her, my tone low.

Mia doesn't want to let me go, but upon seeing the sadness in my eyes, she loosened her grip on my arm.

"Call me if something happens, okay?" she said, showing a genuine smile. "Don't think about them for now, and let yourself breathe." 

Mia caressed my hair gently instead, comforting me. "I'll cover up for you this time. Don't worry about anything."

"Thank you, Mia." I smiled before going outside.

I saw a bench nearby, so I sat there for a while. I was planning to have a good rest here, but to my shock, a man sat beside me.

"Marriage, huh?" a man in his black and white suit said, his tone intimidating and alluring at the same time. "Why don't you want to be married, princess?"